Friday, February 24, 2006

What a great day!!

And I didn't even have my baby!! :) I know, I know...if you've read any of this then you're wondering how it's possible that my miserable self managed to enjoy an actual day of pregnancy at this point. Well, it's hubby and my little boy did it for me.

We got up yesterday morning, lounged around, ate some breakfast and got Mitchell ready for school. Chris and I dropped him off together -- he did pretty good again, yay! -- and came back home. Neither of us had showered yet, so we did that and decided to try and eject Georgia with another DTD session -- obviously unsuccessful, but we did laugh through most of it. Finished getting ready and had a nice lunch at Quiznos. I swear, they have the BEST sandwiches, but my good gracious they're expensive. It was $17 for a kid's pack and our 2 sandwiches. At a sub place, but oh well...we chowed down. :)

We picked Mitchell up, who promptly informed us that he had a great day!! Hooray!! Oh, and EVERYONE was like "You're still pregnant?" Um, yeah...thanks there Captain Obvious and crew. (See me rolling my eyes.) Seriously, what do people expect your response to be? I'm SO over telling people about my last appt, how far I'm dilated, when our induction appt is, blah blah blah. Just wish us well and move on with your lives, people. Oh well, that was the last time I have to endure that torture, because he doesn't have school again until Tuesday and that will be baby-having day if she doesn't come before then!!

So, after we got Mitchell settled in the car with his lunch, we drove to the fire station to get the car seats checked. I've had M's seat checked there several times and got the information off of our hospital's website. Well, we pull up and I go to ring the doorbell for some assistance and there's this sign on the door. "Due to city budget cuts, the educational programs and car seat checks have been discontinued." :( Isn't that sad? We called my mom to have her look on the internet and the only other place doing any checks yesterday was like a 45 minute drive. No thank you. (Besides, Chris wouldn't waste the gas -- hee hee.) So, that's still on the ol' "to do" list. I think there's a place doing them today so we might swing up that way and get it done.

So...Chris asks if I want to go see my Grandpa at the cemetary. I was talking about him earlier in the day and how much I miss him, and we didn't end up making it out around Christmas so I said sure. Mitchell fell asleep in the car, so we just left him in there while we visited the gravesite. (It was like 100 yards away -- don't worry.) Usually I just like to go see, remember some special memories and say "Hi". Well, I got really emotional yesterday -- just kept thinking about how much he would LOVE spending time with Mitchell and how he's probably hog the cuddling of one Miss Georgia Reagan upon her arrival. I just started crying -- poor Chris. He said he didn't mean to make me sad --well, duh. Not you making me sad, buddy. I just miss him a lot, but I'm glad we went to see him. I know he's watching over us.

So, Mitchell was awake when we got to the car so we changed his pull up and drove to the BEST park a few miles away. The boys had an absolutely FANTASTIC time together. They were climbing and sliding and running and jumping. Just having so much fun. The weather was absolutely gorgeous, so that was a bonus, too. We let Mitchell play for about half an hour and then decided to get some walking in. There is a little pond you can walk around at this park, so we headed that way. It was like paydirt for Mitchell -- TONS of ducks and geese flying in and swimming in the melted section of the frozen pond, and on the other side, a HUGE excavator and dump truck working hard. He saw the truck after hearing the "Boom" from the rocks being dumped in and said "Whooooaaaaa...look at that, you guys!! That's AWESOME." :) So, we watched the trucks for awhile, then we watched the ducks/geese for awhile. He would just giggle like crazy when they'd fly in. It was such a fun time! We took my 40 week belly shots in front of the pond, actually.

Then we coaxed (okay, bribed) Mitchell back to the car with the chocolate chip cookie from his kid's pack lunch. Drove home and we all just bummed around until we were hungry for dinner. I watched Oprah and took a nap, not sure what the boys did -- they watched the repeat of the Daytona 500 and played ball, I know that. Then we got up, went to dinner and came home. We watched the Olympics and read with Mitchell. (By the way, Mitchell loves to watch "The Impics." :) Put him to bed and called it a night.

It was such a fun day. Chris and I were talking while we were driving and I told him I was so sorry that he was missing work. He said that he wasn't sorry at all. He said the reason he works so hard is so that he can enjoy some family time without having to worry about having enough vacation or sick days -- he can take them when he needs them. Says he doesn't have one ounce of guilt about not being at work -- said this IS paternity leave. I'm where I'm supposed to be. He also told me that there's a big wide world out there that he misses every day by sitting in his office and to be able to see it through Mitchell's eyes and share it with us as a family is his favorite thing to do and he wouldn't trade it for anything. It was really nice to hear him say those things because I really felt like my little false alarm meant he was wasting his time -- he thinks he'd really be wasting all of our time if he was at work. Sigh. Love him.

Not sure what's up for today...and I kind of like it that way. Don't get me wrong...I'm still READY for her to make her entrance and join our family, but another day like yesterday wouldn't be so bad.

Thursday, February 23, 2006

Strange goings on...

Well, I had some pretty good contractions last night during Georgia's normal active period. Enough to make me stop what I was doing...and enough to start timing them when Chris got home. They were like 10-15 minutes apart most of the time. The funny thing is I got REALLY tired and just conked out, so I think I probably slept through quite a few of them last night. I'm HOPING this is the start of something, but who knows.

Chris was going to go to work today but decided he'd rather stay home -- doesn't want to leave me. I'm glad. We'll see what happens.

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

This sucks...

Okay, so EVERYTHING has annoyed me today. Mitchell woke up in a cranky, sassy mood and that pretty much put me in the same frame of mind, unfortunately. It's just hard not to start off on the wrong foot when you have a whiney, sassy kid following you around being mouthy at 6:30 a.m. Poor Chris -- I think he just really tried to stay out of my way today, which was probably smart. He took Mitchell to run some errands after lunch and they showed up at home with some ice cream -- even smarter move. :)

I don't know...I just felt sort of "on edge" today. Not mad, not upset, just very irritable. Mitchell didn't take a nap today so we're getting ready to head up to the bathtub and then bedtime early tonight. He's so cute...he's sitting there reading books to himself right now. I asked him if he wanted me to read to him and he said "No, mommy...I'm reading by myself." It's so cute to hear them read the stories in their own words. His favorite book right now is "The New Baby" by Mercer Mayer. He reads it probably 5 times a day. Hope that's a good sign.

We decided that Chris will go back to work tomorrow and Friday so that he can take 2 more days off next week and not go back to work until the 13th. That would be great if it works out like that...we'll just see.

I've had lots more contractions yesterday and today...when I have them now, it's strange. It's almost like it frames Georgia -- like I have a cinder block in there -- gets all boxy. They're definitely stronger and more obvious, but not hurting and not regular...yet. We'll see. Chris did leave to go coach his mock trial team...maybe that's all it will take!! Him leaving for that and threatening to go back to work and we'll trick her out! :) least we'll come home to a clean, much more organized house. We got a LOT of stuff done today...sorted through the toys in the living room, moved some up to Mitchell's room, moved books/office stuff out of the other half of Mitchell's closet, etc. I also did the floors again, dusted, and cleared out the junk mail. I think I'll throw a load of laundry in tonight after I put him to bed and then I'll call it a day myself.

Did I mention I'm ready for her to come out? I am...very ready. Sigh.

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Forget it...

I'm done trying to be happy and cheerful the whole time. I want my baby and I want her now!! I know in the grand scheme of things, a week is only a matter of 7 days. I know this...I'm a logical, rational, thinking person. I'm aware that a week's time is nothing. But you know what, when you've spent the last 40 weeks with this date firmly cemented in your family's future history -- a week beyond it DOES seem like a long time.

I mean, what if you had your dream vacation planned for the 20th and the 20th gets here, your bags are packed, the house is clean, everyone (and I mean the entire free world) knows you're "leaving", you get to the airport and find out your plane is delayed. Delayed? For how long? Well, not sure. It COULD be that things could go into motion on their own and your plane could leave anytime now -- go home and wait to see if that happens. If nothing happens before the 27th, then call us at 7:30 p.m. on the 27th and we'll tell you if THAT flight to Hawaii has room for you. If not, then we'll certainly get you in as soon as possible.

NOW does it seem like a long time, people????????? Because it sure does to me!!!!!! I think the thing that's also complicating things is that Chris had to schedule his paternity leave WAAAYYY ahead of time. I guess we should have anticipated this (hindsight-right?) and had it start NEXT Monday? But you know, then she would have been early.

Anyway... I know people just try to make you feel better, but in the moment, a week feels like an eternity to me.

Monday, February 20, 2006

Trying to enjoy it...

After we put Mitchell to bed last night, Chris and I were laying in bed watching tv and talking. I think he's probably so sick of hearing "Are you excited?" "Are you nervous?", etc. Seems like I'm always trying to see if his current emotional state matches mine. He's such a sweet guy though, never sighs or rolls his eyes like "Dang, woman -- leave me alone," which is what I'm sure he'd love to do. He indulges me and takes part in my little conversations.

We were talking last night about how rare a moment we might be enjoying. Laying in our bed before 10pm with no noise in the house, having a quiet conversation. I know that I've been so antsy for her to arrive, but I know once Georgia's here, it's gonna be all chaos and even when we *can* be in bed together at night, we'll both just fall in exhausted and sleep like logs. There will be middle of the night feedings, pumpings, diaper changes, blowouts/clothes changings, etc. Not to mention, I have NO idea if all that commotion will impact Mitchell since the changing table is on the same wall as his bed. You know what -- that thought never even ENTERED my mind until now-- I hope it's not a big problem. Good thing he's a sound sleeper -- guess we'll find out just how sound though. Might have to get another plan in place for middle of the night changes if she's a big crier.

Anyway -- I think instead of obsessing over how much longer until we get to meet her, I need to start appreciating what we already have. Not to say I'm not still excited to hold her and get her out here as part of our family, but there are still *some* advantages to having her in my tummy. Sleep and rest and quiet being three off the top of my head. :)

Today's my due date, by the way. Off to the doctor at 10:15, and hopefully we'll come home with a planned birthday for her, in case she doesn't choose her own before then.

Sunday, February 19, 2006


It's FREEZING here. Yesterday the high was in the teens and the windchill at night is WELL below zero. So what did Chris and I decide would be a great thing to do yesterday? Yes, that's right...we put carseats in the car. In the freezing car. Inside of the freezing garage. For like an hour and a half. As you can imagine, by the end of that time, there was a mix of laughter and snippiness with each other. I have no idea why putting that infant base in was such an ordeal, but for whatever reason, it was. By the time I got inside, my butt cheeks were LITERALLY frozen. Just so cold. So I sat on them...warmed them up nicely that way!! :)

I can't imagine not having somewhere to live right now and trying to deal with that cold. Just even walking out to get the paper puts a chill in your bones for at least a few minutes. I know there are shelters and places like that, but you know not everyone is able to get to one for whatever reason.

On that same topic, we were watching the Olympics yesterday and the announcers happened to mention that the bobsled hill cost $93 million dollars to construct. How in the world can Italy find that kind of extra money? Or Greece for the previous summer ones to build a big stadium? Or Salt Lake City? And then what happens to those places? Do they get torn down? Do they just sit? I guess I don't get it -- doesn't seem like the best idea to just keep building these random things in random places to get used for 2 weeks when there are so many better ways to use the money. I mean -- if you really stop to think about the Olympics and how much money it takes to put them on -- it's astounding.

Anyway...not sure why I was thinking about that, I just was.

I got all of the cleaning done, which makes me feel great. I was watching the video from when we brought Mitchell home the other day and GOOD LORD our house was nasty. There was stuff EVERYWHERE!! Now, true, it was the beginning of the Christmas season, so I still had some decorating boxes out and stuff, but it was clutter city!! Those were the days when we still had a coffee table (which is LONG gone now) and you couldn't even SEE it, there was so much stuff on it. I refused to have that happen again, so we're looking good now. Even all of our laundry (except for yesterday's stuff) is clean. Chris' dress shirts -- everything! Feels good. I think today I'll run the vaccuum again and clean the kitchen from top to bottom. I also need to sterilize my breast pump parts and the bottles and nipples so those are all good to go. I think I'll also get Chris to pull out the fridge and oven for me so I can clean behind there. Been bugging me for some reason. Other than that, we're good and she can come anytime now!! If not, we have a dr. appt on Monday morning.

In other words, don't look for a new post until after my appointment tomorrow. Sigh.

Friday, February 17, 2006

Well, if it means anything...

I cleaned like I'd never get the chance again yesterday. I'm a little sore today, but it feels good to have it done. I have several more things to check off of my cleaning list today, but we'll just see what the day brings. It sure would be nice to get it all done and bring her home to a nice, organized clean home. Ha!! Right. Like it will stay like this or something. Not.

With Mitchell I never had the "nesting" thing kick in. Might have been busy using that up at work, trying to get ready for maternity leave. With Georgia so far, it's just been organizing and de-cluttering. Yesterday though, I just felt like kicking it into high gear with cleaning. Plus, it was cold and snowy out, so that helped that we were in for the day. Same thing today, so we'll see what happens.

I'm at the point where the majority of our phone calls and/or emails are either daily checkins from family or "Is she here yet" inquiries from family/friends. It's nice to be thought of and prayed for, but it would also be nice to not have to say "Not yet" and tell how I'm doing 14,000 times a day. (Okay, maybe not quite that many.) Know what's funny? Even Mitchell asked me yesterday "Is she ready to come out of your tummy yet?" I guess maybe I must look like she can't possibly stay in there any longer or something, huh?

I'm really excited that Chris is done with work after today. Maybe she'll come this weekend on her own...or in the first part of next week? That would be GREAT!! We'd love that! Too bad we're not in charge. Funny how these babies run the show even before they take their first breaths, huh? Oh least we still have time to install the car seat! (Um, yeah...can you tell Chris has put that little task off? I'm ANAL about it so I'm about ready to do it myself!!!)

The waiting game continues...

Thursday, February 16, 2006

Stiiiiilllll going...

Had my 39 week appointment yesterday. No change. Nothing doing. It was with the doctor I'm probably least comfortable with in the practice. She's not very friendly...not unfriendly, just I always get the impression that she'd rather be somewhere else. She never tries to familiarize herself with me, my situation, anything personal like that. Just all business. I guess that's good because I'm sure she'd be great at actually delivering the baby -- but it's such a personal experience that I prefer someone who also wants to know you and a little bit about you. I would think it would be quite an honor and privilege to be part of helping someone's family grow and bringing a new life into the world. I guess that's just me...I'd try to make sure that the personal part of it was as as important to me as the medical/business part of it if I were an OB. Oh well... hopefully she won't be on call when I need to deliver, but if she is, it will be fine.

My friend gave me very good advice yesterday. She told me that as hard as it is, to try to take a step back and appreciate the experience. Focus on the amazing child I've been raising for the past three years and see him in a new light. Concentrate on what truly a miracle it is to have another little person growing inside of me and appreciate what a blessing it is to be able to do this. I think she's absolutely right. This is the last child for us, so these are the last few days I'll EVER be pregnant, and as miserable as I am at times, I know I'll miss it. As eager as I am to hold and cuddle and snuggle her, I know I'll miss watching her move inside of me...there's just something magical about it.

Anyway...I'm trying to not to be too big of a complainer here at the end, but sometimes it's just hard. It will be over soon and we'll have her to hold and this will seem like forever ago. I do remember that. Waiting is hard in waiting in line at the grocery store, waiting for a package to come in the mail, waiting for a phone call from a friend, waiting for a loved one to come home. I can honestly say though that waiting for a little person that you helped create and grow into a strong, healthy human being is the hardest waiting of all. That said, it's more than worth it.

Sunday, February 12, 2006

Random thoughts on a Sunday morning...

Well, if you'd like to know, the title for each new blog post is usually the stumper for me. Since I don't have a specific topic in mind this morning, thought I'd just call it what it is and be done with it.

I felt AWFUL yesterday -- bathroom issues. My dad and mom were sweet enough to take Mitchell to a friend's birthday party for me, which ended up being a good thing. I didn't feel okay again until I woke up this morning. The issues resolved like mid-afternoon, but I still didn't feel really great. I found out that not only did they go, but that my sister in law, brother, 2 nephews and my sil's sister all went too. I really couldn't believe it when I heard that -- who would ever think to do that? (My family, obviously.) I was of course concerned about how my friend received them. I mean, it was in a restaurant that has tons of kids anyway, but I just felt bad that the focus was supposed to be on Mitchell's little friend and here comes my herd of a family. Apparently they got their own table, but I feel bad about that. I think that Mitchell should have sat at the table with his buddy, not with my family. Anyway, nothing I can do about it now -- I just feel bad about it. My sister in law called last night and said she'd like to send my friend's little boy a book or something with a thank you note for being so nice, which is a nice gesture. Ugh. Oh well...can't worry about it now. I just left my friend a message apologizing for the crashing of his party. I really hope she's not mad. I had no idea that would happen or in all honesty, I would never have had them take him. I just know Mitchell loves that place (it's the same place we had his party), he was excited to see his buddy and we already had the gift. we're going to Sam's Club. I'm already cringing thinking about how much the total will be at the checkout stand. We have a hard time getting out of there for under 2 or 3oo on our normal trips, and we really want to stock up today. Plus, we've really run down our freezer and pantry supplies lately, so I think it would be more than usual anyway. Oh well...we've got it figured out, just those big numbers are hard to hear! It sure will be nice to bring baby home to a well stocked freezer and pantry though. At least for those first couple of weeks, or hopefully the first month or so.

Chris is excited because NASCAR starts again today. I'm happy for him, but my goodness, they just finished like 2 weeks ago, I swear!!! It's like the neverending sport season. This also means that we were in Daytona for the big race a year ago...strange. I was at my thinnest, having some beer, eating blue cheese, staying up late, etc. I think that's one of the things about having a baby...for the rest of the family, it really kicks in when baby comes home. For the woman carrying the pretty much start giving up things from day one. I want to try and breastfeed again for at least 6 months, so by the time it's all said and done, that's a good year and half or so of my body not being my own. I know it sounds selfish but I'm ready to have it back to myself.

Last night Georgia was a maniac when I was trying to go to bed. She was REALLY on the move, kicks and punches in my sides, in my ribs, out my hoo-haa (I swear!). Chris was downstairs doing some work, so I was all alone and silly as it sounds, I sat up after about 10 minutes and had a chat with my little girl. It was after 10 pm, I was wiped out and all those movements really HURT. I sat up and said "Look, Georgia. Either screw your head way down in there and break my water or settle down and go to sleep." 5 minutes later she decided to go to sleep. I actually only got up once to go to the bathroom last night and Mitchell slept till 7. I feel much better today...amazing what some rest can do for the body. I actually woke up because I heard her mobile playing music...he LOVES it. He was standing in there watching and listening to it. He said "Hi, Mommy. I like her mobile-wheel." :) He's such a cutie. It's just bizarre because the last time he was so in love with it, he was a little infant boy laying in his crib giggling every time the yellow guy went around. Sigh. How'd he get to be so big??

Okay, before I get mushy I'm gonna go. Let me just say that I wouldn't be opposed to a little help from the full moon tomorrow night. A Valentine baby would be fine by me at this point. I'm ready to have her here.

Friday, February 10, 2006

Heartburn bites the big one..

Just in case any of you weren't aware, heartburn sucks. Especially when you're a week and a half away from your due date, snuggled into a warm bed while it's snowing outside, and otherwise generally comfy (which doesn't happen very often). I actually had such bad heartburn last night that I nearly vomited...that's rare for me, so you know it was bad. It is now 5:20 a.m. and I've been up since 1:30. Lovely, eh? Should make for a SPECTACULAR day. Not.

Well, I had my 38 week appt yesterday...not very thrilling. I'm one centimeter dilated but still have a high, thick cervix. My bp was fine, her heartbeat was strong, nothing up with the urine... in other words, nothing doing. I have my next appt on Wednesday's with the one doctor I really didn't "click" with so much last time, so I hope I feel better about it this time. I also still haven't seen the doctor who actually delivered Mitchell, but with any luck she won't be the one on call when I deliver and it won't matter. Otherwise, I guess I'll just make my next appt with her just in case.

My new dilemma is figuring out if we should try to push for an induction on or RIGHT after our due date (the 20th). Since I went into labor on my due date with Mitchell, Chris' leave worked out great. This time, I'd really, REALLY like to have some time to bond as a family before he has to go back, so I'd really hate it if half of his two weeks off was spent just hanging out, waiting for her to be born. As of yesterday, the doctor told me that we have my next week appt at 39 weeks, then if I make it to my 40 week appt, we can schedule an induction for 5-7 days afterwards before I leave the office. I'm *hoping* it doesn't come to that, but thinking about asking for an induction instead of an appt at 40 weeks was my idea in the car on the way home. I wonder if they'd give me a hard time about that? I haven't had any issues along the way (health-wise), and she's measuring a few days ahead anyway. I guess we'll just see.

Next Monday is a full moon...I wonder if it might "pull" me into labor? I wouldn't mind a Valentine Baby...not at all. I wonder if she would enjoy it though? I know some people don't enjoy having their birthdays near holidays...I wonder if that would be one she'd hate to share. Personally, I wouldn't mind...never been real big into Valentine's Day as it is. It might suck as a kid though...the Valentine parties were always fun...decorating your little "mailbox", passing out valentines and candy. She would have to share her birthday treats as part of the party I bet. Oh's not for me to decide at this point! If she comes out then and ends up hating it, I'll tell her it's her own fault...she is the one who chose her birthday!! :)

Thursday, February 09, 2006

Just another Thursday...

Well, technically it's our anniversary, but in reality it's just another Thursday. Mitchell has school, I have a doctor appointment, Chris has to work, I have swim class tonight. Yep, just the regular Thursday routine. His parents are going to keep Mitchell for us tomorrow night while we go to dinner, but nothing major and very close to home. I swear, with all that has gone on, it feels like we've been married for 14 years, not 4.

I think there's a plus side and a down side to not having anything on the calendar these next couple of weeks. I think I thought I was doing myself and Mitchell a favor by staying here, resting, not planning anything so close to my due date, but now I think we might get bored. I think we'll still make daily trips somewhere...Walmart for a 99 cent treat, the library, etc. Sitting around and waiting...not sure I can do that for 2 more weeks. My dad offered to come out here 2 days next week to help me "chase Mitchell". I gladly accepted since getting on the floor and playing is not exactly a good time for me anymore. Mitchell has been pretty patient for the most part and a very good boy, but bath time sucks and so does picking up toys at night. (I used to do it before nap time too, but now we just do it at night because it's a big ol' chore for me and this belly.) Yesterday we went to pick up my thyroid meds at the pharmacy and I told him if he was really good, I'd let him pick out a treat before we left. He was good...for the first 13 minutes of our 15 minute visit to the store. Then he started jogging in front of me (I had to get some bagels/cream cheese for MOPS tomorrow and some sprinkles for his Valentine's party at school on Tuesday) while I was shopping and wouldn't stop. I just get REALLY paranoid about someone grabbing him because I know that stores are prime places for that type of thing and I'm not exactly agile.

Soooo...I had to grab him by the shoulder of his coat when I got close enough and pull him to the front of the store, plop the stuff I was carrying around in a basket by the door and wrestle him (screaming) into a cart. Picked up my stuff out of the basket, threw it into the cart and tried to make the quickest exit possible. Of course he was in full on tantrum mode at that point, but *patting myself on the back*, I kept my cool. I was PISSED but just calmly told him how his behavior was unacceptable, I was very sad he was acting that way, and no treat for him. He was of course crying and screaming...thought about biting me and got a look at my face and thought twice (smart move)...but calmed down about 2 minutes into it when he figured out he wasn't going to get out or get a reaction out of me.

Nice, huh? Of course, by the time we get to the checkout lane he's quiet, wiping his eyes, and trying to apologize. I thanked him for his apology and let him know that he did indeed blow it with regard to his treat. I knew the next battle would be for control of the music in the car, so I politely informed him that we'd be listening to mommy's music in the car because he made such bad choices in the store. That started a mini-wave of tears, but he recovered pretty quickly and apologized again (without solicitation from me, I might add). 3 years old is proving to be an interesting phase...more of a sense of entitlement on his part that I think, is driven by independence. That seems to lead to pretty intense, though much shorter tantrums, followed by remorse and apologies that I usually don't even have to coach him through. He's turning into a little man, I tell ya!!

The cycle is a bit exhausting for me at this point, but then again, so is putting on my socks.

Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Little Miracles

Kids are little miracles, aren't they? I guess the closer I get to meeting our little girl, the more in awe of our little boy I am. Chris and Mitchell were "playing wrestling" (obviously I've opted out of this activity for awhile now) and I was just blown away watching them. I'm feeling my belly and all these little baby feet and kicks and movements and watching someone who started out there and is now doing flying leaps onto his daddy's belly for fun. Crazy.

I think that's the biggest difference between my last pregnancy and this one. Last time I was running around (okay, maybe not RUNNING) like a chicken with my head cut off right up until like 4 days before going into labor. I was trying to get ready for a half year (ended up being year and a half, but same idea) maternity leave at a really bad time to do that in the schools. It was conference time, which for me meant 4 nights of parent-teacher conferences to prepare for and attend since I had 2 schools. PLUS, I was trying to train the woman who was taking my position and trying to get testing/reports done through like spring break. (Even though it was the end of November.) I remember my last day was supposed to be the Friday before Thanksgiving and I ended up coming in on Monday and Tuesday anyway to finish testing and write reports. All I would do is get up early, get ready, go to work, gut it out, come home, make and eat dinner and then fall asleep on the couch until Chris woke me up to go upstairs to bed. That was my life. That was it.

This, a bit different. No full time job to go job is here at home. Some days, if I don't want to get out of my jammies until noon (or ever), I don't have to. I haven't worn half of my maternity wardrobe...namely the dresses, jumpers, dress pants, skirts and dressy blouses. Save for a couple of dinners out, parties and things like that, I mostly wear jeans and sweats. Sad, but true. I mean, I'm coloring, painting, doing playdough, playing blocks, giving baths, going to the grocery store, etc. It's not like anyone but Mitchell sees me half the time anyway. The thing that goes along with being more comfortable and a slower pace (thank GOD for that -- literally-- by the way) is that I have had more time to contemplate this pregnancy. I feel like I have more time to think about everything associated with it...especially now at the end.

In addition to more time, I now also have experience on my side and under my belt which makes thinking about labor and delivery, bringing her home, and the whole newborn thing very different than when I thought about these with Mitchell. I feel like I know more, but at the same time, there's so much I don't know with this's a GIRL. We know boys. :) Besides, now we have Mitchell to contend with and worry about in addition to Georgia. Being able to handle that aspect of things (and get out the door when I need to) is probably what has me the most nervous. I've heard people say that it's REALLY hard to go from 1 to 2 kids...much easier to go from 2 to 3, which doesn't make much sense to me until I think *duh*'s this transition. It's probably similar to the difficulty in adjusting from being single to being married, I imagine...just OBVIOUSLY on a much bigger scale.

I'm looking forward to everything for sure. I've been a little nostalgic this week. I wanted to show Mitchell some of his birth video so he could see us at the hospital and what a teeny tiny baby he was. He loved it but couldn't figure out where Ryan was when he saw his Aunt Jen and Uncle Tim...Ryan is 4 months younger! :) He was intrigued and I was misty eyed. Could that really be HIM on the screen? Was he EVER that tiny? Hearing his little newborn cry brought back feelings and memories I didn't expect...very strange. I had the same nostalgic feelings when I was going through his baby clothes, too. I washed them up for my sister in law who is on bedrest and due 2 weeks after me (but will probably have her baby first, I bet) and was just in a pool of tears looking at and remembering all of those precious clothes. I remembered going places and doing things with him in those outfits. The outfit he wore home from the hospital, his first shoes, the outfit he wore to the hospital when Ryan was born, the little jean jacket he wore when we took him to meet my mom's friends at bowling, etc. It was all just flooding back.

I can't wait to meet her and see what she looks like and feel her cute little baby bootie all snuggled up in the palm of my hand and smell that wonderful baby smell. I can't wait for Mitchell to meet her and I already cry thinking about that moment. He's been SO excited about everything...picked out a special toy to take to the hospital for's the turtle from Baby Neptune. He's named it "Turtle the Turtis" by the way. I just am excited to see another little person start this big adventure called life and can't belive how fast it all goes.

Monday, February 06, 2006

I hate potty training...

and so does Mitchell, I'm pretty sure. I think the thing is...we've tried to be really laid back about the whole thing...making everything available and offering to help, but not pushing it. Usually we'll ask and he'll say "No thanks" or "Not right now" or something along those lines. The thing that Chris and I have COMPLETELY had it with is that the kid won't even TELL us when he needs a new pullup if he's pooped. It is just disgusting and nasty and the MOST irritating thing in my daily life at the moment. I mean, he's 3 years old, we haven't AT ALL pushed him in the potty training, we're not even requiring him to sit up there, we just want him to tell us when he needs a new pullup. That's it. Not hard. No punishment. But boy howdy do I get angry when I go to change him (if I haven't smelled it) and it's obviously been there and stuck on and mixed with pee and the whole 9 yards. Nothing guaranteed to get my goat sooner than that these days. Chris is right there with me.

We've told him OVER AND OVER that all he has to do is tell us, we'll get a new pullup, change him and be done with it. Nope. Not happening.

Well, I had reached my wits end Saturday night when he did it. I just told Chris we've got to start making something happen...I can't do this anymore. I can't explain why it makes me so angry/irritated, it just is a major hot button. (I'm sure preggo hormones factor in there somewhere, but it could be the fact that we've been doing this for so long now.) Anyway, Chris and I decided that yesterday, whether he liked it or not, Mitchell would be spending a good chunk of his day on the potty.

So he gets up yesterday morning and I inform him that before we go downstairs for the juice, cheerios, vitamins and cartoons ritual, he will be sitting on the potty. I got some minor whining and complaining, but nothing major. Sat up there, nothing happened, but at least he cooperated. Well, I also told him that I'd be setting the timer and when it went off, no matter what we were doing, we'd stop and go upstairs to try pottying again. "Okay, mommy." (Yeah, right...I've learned to add that mental response.) 45 minutes later, all hell breaks loose when the timer goes off. He just completely loses his mind. You know those hysterical crying, drooling, swatting instead of hitting, completely out of control meltdowns? Well, that's where we were when I was getting him on the potty.

Now here's the dilemma I I let him learn the lesson that if you throw a big enough fit, you'll get your way? Or, do I let him learn the lesson that he's going to have to start taking some active role in this even if he's not all that excited about it, and if that means stop playing with toys for a potty break, then that's what he needs to do. I do have to pat myself on the back and say that I remained super calm (on the outside -- I was really upset inside) but held him on there and told him that we could let him down when he calmed down. Chris was awakened by the commotion...I wouldn't be surprised if we woke the neighbors-- so he quickly came to my aid. He held him on there and it was a good 15 minutes or so of just freaking out on Mitchell's end. We asked "Is it hurting you?" "No." "Are you scared?" "No." If either of those had been yes...he'd have gotten down, but he was just being a stubborn little pill who didn't want to stop playing. (That's been the problem all along.) Now keep in mind that we have SEVERAL incentives built into the whole operation and we were reminding him of them...some are natural, some are tangible. When he finally stopped his freak out session, we talked a lot about why we were doing what we were doing.

We came back downstairs with the understanding that the next time the timer went off, he would again need to sit on the potty. We were really, really playing up the "big boy" part of all of this, as that's a big deal these days. Well, I'm glad we stuck to our guns and gutted out the 15 minutes of chaos because the timer went off and what do you know? He literally RAN to the stairs and said "Come on,'s time for me to sit on the potty!!" By the time I waddled up the stairs, he had his pants off and was climbing on the toilet seat. I about peed my own pants. Nothing productive, but was a start. Same thing the next 2 times the timer went off. And last night, there were two times he got this funny look on his face and said "I need to go potty." We got up there and you could tell he had JUST peed in his pullup, so I think he was starting to hook the two things up. This morning, he came over to tell me something and stunk to high heaven. I said "Mitchell, is there anything you need to tell me?" He said "Yeah, mommy. I pooped and I need a new pullup." I think my jaw dropped to the floor. I said "Well, please go get one and come right back." "Okay, mommy." And he did!!! Afterwards, he said "I told you mommy, I told you!!" He was so proud, heck, I was so felt really good.

This little teeny bit of progress makes me wish we'd been more forceful earlier, but the meltdown thing was always in the way. I just couldn't get past it because I had all of these "voices" (experts, friends, etc.) telling me that holding him up there and making it a negative experience was the worst possible thing I could do. Well, I tried to combat that by not letting him down until he was okay and it wasn't so bad anymore. I'm so glad we did because it does seem to have made an impact.

In the meantime, I still hate potty training. I think I need some tangible reinforcers to stay with it more than he does!!

Saturday, February 04, 2006

I've done this before, right?

You'd think I'd be more "sure" about what the heck is going on. I had an interesting night of playing "is it labor" vs. "is it not" last night. I've decided on it's not. My back hurt, but that came and went (same with Mitchell's labor) and I was really uncomfortable with some contractions and having to go to the bathroom way more often. I just was very, very uncomfortable. I also think I lost small parts of my plug two days last week, so who knows what that means!! I think the thing I just can't get over is how foreign it all feels. You'd think that everything would just come rushing back, but nope. I feel like I've never done this before and that I'm no more clued in this time than I was last time. It's all a waiting game and I know you just take it as it comes. I've said all along that I doubt I'll go before Valentine's Day, so we'll just have to see how this all plays out. For now, I'll just rest when I can and listen to my body. (Whatever that means.)

I guess I just expected to feel more like I knew what was going on, but I don't. I am hoping it's not like this when she's here -- I better know what the heck I'm doing there!!

Thursday, February 02, 2006


I'm just really tired. REALLY tired. I can't figure out what Mitchell's deal is with napping either. I took him to the ped today for his cold stuff and he said that he very well could be giving up his nap. :-( Not sure I know how to put into words my level of disappointment about that timing. I really, REALLY looked forward to the two hours of quiet time alone every day and was very much looking forward to having those with the baby or still to myself if God would allow them to actually sleep at the same time. Now I'm left with "quiet time" in his room, but he is a very busy boy and "quiet time" is a relative term here. Ugh. Anyway...not so thrilled about that development. The thing that's frustrating is that he'll TOTALLY fall asleep in the car, but not when we get home. I worked my BOOTIE off keeping him awake today on our way home from dr. appointments, but do you think he'd sleep in his bed? Nope. At least he played upstairs for awhile.

Guess I forgot to tell the Big Guy Upstairs about my master plan, huh?

Wednesday, February 01, 2006

I love my alert!!

I know I've been writing a lot about that lately, but I really do. I know that everyone goes through ups and downs in every relationship, but I've been so happy with the way that we've both worked so hard to stick together lately. He's been crazed (and I mean CRAZED) at work, I've been crazed at home, lots of holiday/family events, and of course trying to prepare Mitchell, ourselves and our home for a new baby. I think that there are times where it would be really easy to draw into ourselves and not work together...just kind of the "you do this, I'll do that" type of thing, but we really have worked as a team and rely on each other all of the time. I love it. Last night we laid on the bed and just talked for about 45 minutes after we put Mitchell down. It was so great...just talking about all sorts of things, holding was just so comforting. I have heard so many stories lately about people who have such difficult and awful relationships, so I feel extra lucky to be supported so completely.

I just love my husband and hope he knows how much. It means the world to me to be married to my best friend.