Never A Dull Moment...

Comfortable In My Own Shoes...

2010-03-19T07:21:00.000-07:00

During that day I recently told you about, there were several times that I thought to myself how nice it would be to be in someone else's shoes.

As I struggled to keep The Masonator from dismantling each and every tire display, I looked with envy at the woman who was sitting quietly by herself, getting things checked off of her to-do list as she waited. I thought about how nice it would be to swap places with my friend who is currently on vacation, visiting Las Vegas and Los Angeles. As I chased you-know-who around the waiting room, I looked longingly at the variety of moms who were able to sit and watch their child do gymnastics or read a book of their own during the class.

That night as I was going to bed, I started to think about just how lucky I am to be just who I am.

Maybe the woman in the tire store wasn't working on a "to do" list at all...maybe she was trying to figure out which bills she could pay and which ones she couldn't. I know that my friend who is on vacation right now is having some pretty significant stress in her life these days, and truth be told, she NEEDS that vacation more than I do. What if some of those gymnastics moms who were reading were secretly watching me with Mason, thinking of another baby they'd always wanted but were unable to have or the baby that they'd desperately wanted and lost?

I know from my own crazy experiences in life that you just do not ever truly know someone's story. People are usually beyond shocked when I share some of the things from my own past because truthfully, you'd just never guess that I have been through some of what I have if you didn't know me at the time. I have had similar conversations with other people I've met and have been left in such a state of surprise -- thinking to myself that just moments earlier, I'd had *no idea* that whatever had just been shared was a part of that person's life story.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that I am trying to keep a head full of perspective and remain thankful simply to be me...to be content walking in my own shoes, no matter how deep the mucky mud (too much Dora!) is along the way some days.

I recently got some new slippers and they are SO comfy. They're soft, they're warm, they're cozy, and now - after several months of wear, they are uniquely mine. My feet have molded them to fit ME, and I know that they wouldn't be as comfortable to someone else because their foot wouldn't fit just right into the groove that has been carved out by mine. I feel like life is also like that. No matter what is put in my path, my life and my experiences are uniquely my own. God has a specific plan for me, and I need to make myself available to receive the blessings and mercy that He has for me each day. I also need to remember that He is by my side on the days that are so easy to forget all of this!

I am blessed beyond measure, even on my worst days...I just need to remind myself of that more often!

Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Mini-Me Update

2010-03-18T07:38:00.000-07:00

Since it's been awhile since I talked about this whole "thing" I figured an update was in order. From July 2008 to July 2009, I lost 65 pounds. I have managed to keep 55-60 off consistently. I still have about 30-35 to go.

And to those of you who know me in "real life" and say "No, you don't!" -- YES, I DO. I will save you the trauma of seeing it for yourselves, just trust me. It's definitely there to lose. In several places that clothes thankfully hide for me. 'Nuff said there, I hope.

Anyway. I'm sort of in a rut and am hoping to bust through here soon. I think what happened is that I was part of a very supportive group, and the main focuses of the group definitely "clicked" with me. I stumbled upon it at just the right time and definitely put forth the consistent hard work and effort in all areas that I need to in order to be successful.

Since then, I have definitely been in maintenance mode. Lots of big life changes have happened and I've sort of weathered them by doing half-way things in the way of health and fitness.

I can say that the absolute KEY to my weight loss and health improvements were 150% God sponsored. By that, I mean that being in The Word, prayer time, encouragement with my friends, scripture memorization and truly putting Him first was what worked. Well, currently, NONE of that is happening consistently. And it hasn't for some time now.

I just came to this realization the other day and it was like DUH. What did I *think* would happen? If you don't have the KEY, you can't unlock the door.

So, here I am. Knowing where I am, who I am and where I need to go and who I need to be. Nothing has to change -- I just need to remember that I am first and foremost a child of God and live my life according to the purpose and focus I know that I have within me through His grace.

It will take some gut-busting willpower, prayer, and determination. I'm trying to regather my mojo and just get back into the groove. As usual, there are many things in my way every day to prevent this. I'm just trying to remember what is TRULY important each day. When I was in such a good place, not only was I losing weight, working out and getting healthy -- I also had more patience, energy and motivation to get the rest of my life healthy, too. I also weathered the storms that come our way in a much better way, too.

So, there ya go. There's your update. I think I'll go back to Mini-Me Monday updates to keep myself accountable. Ask me if I don't...I need some support and keeping me accountable is a great way to help. Thanks, bloggy friends!!

One of those days...

2010-03-16T18:25:00.000-07:00

Don't I start almost every post by saying I'm going to blog more? Yeah, I thought so.

I thought for sure I really would be blogging more right now, especially since I'm on a self-imposed Facebook break during Lent. The thing is, I've been so stinkin' busy lately, I haven't been much of anywhere. (Unless crazy is a place, in which case I have been living there.)

I thought I'd jump back in with a classic Never a Dull Moment kind of day. Nothing like a day full of chaos to get ya back in the bloggy mood, eh?

Currently, I am sitting at my kitchen table in half darkness. I am having a glass of wine. One kid is in bed, the other two are watching Wonder Pets. My husband is on his way home, and upon entry will find the following:

*five (yes, five) loads of clean laundry heaped on the couch waiting to be folded
*a sink full of dishes in soapy water
*a dishwasher waiting to be emptied
*gross kitchen/eating nook/family room floors
*the kitchen counter full of all of my work stuff

This is all before the poor guy goes upstairs. Yikes.

It has been, well...one of those days. No other way to put it. It was one of those days by 7:30 a.m. I know that if anyone still reads this thing, the majority of you (which probably means two out of three people - ha!) will be able to relate and I don't need to expand on that.

**Disclaimer: if you are lucky enough to be that one person who is thinking "What is this woman TALKING about?"... please count your blessings and move along. Take your clear mind and do *not* clutter it up with the mundane chaos that has somehow become my every day. You are more than welcome to read this blog, I'm just sayin' I will not be held responsible for the mucky brain syndrome that may come through osmosis.**

(Oh, and FYI - I still love my life, some days there is just a bit much of it for me.)

So...about today.

School dropoff. Got my first grader in the door just before the tardy bell rang. Accomplishing this meant asking my kids if they liked it when I yelled. (Yes, I really asked them that question and no, I wasn't kidding.) You see, this was the kind of morning where I started out as Patientloving Mom, asking the same things of the same kids - nicely, I might add - three times. Mount St. Crazymom erupted on request #4 -- and whaddya know? Instant performance by my little cherubs. Feels horrible to me and I know they can't stand it -- but there we were. All in a scruffy little whirpool of tension and yelling. No fun. (By the way, I do realize what a truly ridiculous question that was on my part. I absolutely know that they don't like it when I yell, but this morning -- I really was beginning to wonder. Again, I'm thinking 2 out of 3 of you feel me on this one.)

So, anyway - we got to gymnastics class. Late. By about 5 minutes, but miraculously, they were starting 5 minutes late so not a biggie today. UNTILLLLLL the door from the cubby room to the gym closed and Mason realized he was once again denied access to all of the fun stuff that taunts him from the other side of the big windows. It is pure torture for him to have to watch the kids run, jump, tumble, swing, hop, bounce, flip, climb and (just paused to yell again, fyi - the hits just keep on comin') skip. He wants SO badly to be in the middle of all of that fun, and yet he is stuck on the other side of the windows with all of the parents. Poor guy. Today, I took a bag full of toys and decided that I would not sit in the room with the big windows. Instead, I'd sit in the smaller, boring room of cubbies so that Mason could run and play. It meant not watching Georgia do her thing, but I thought it would be easier with Mr. FussyPants.

Wellllll, after first glaring at me as she stepped over Tantrum City on her way to the cubbies, another gymnastics mom then decided to camp out at the door of the cubby room with herself and her younger daughter. Did I mention that said camping was done with the door to the gym cracked open?? *sigh* REALLY?! Ugh. Sooooo...I pick up Tantrum City and come back for all of his toys and we move to the window room after all. So much for plans on that one! We survived the torturous hour of waiting and headed home.

As I was driving, I noticed the car pulling a bit to the right, but didn't think much of it since we just had our brakes replaced and they said that the shocks/struts are next and they might impact the alignment until then. (Good times.) After a few hours, some lunch, a whole bunch of laundry, etc. - it's time to go get Mitchell from school.

OF COURSE, both of the little ones are still asleep. (Yes, I sighed here, too.) Sooooo...I wake them both up, complete with two sets of sad little faces and matching tears. I was hoping that the sunshine (what?!), walk in the stroller and some playtime at the playground would cheer them up. Luckily, it did. When we got home, as I was breaking up fight #8943043 (this one about who would get the mail out of the mailbox), I noticed that the van looked like it was at like a 45 degree angle, sloping to the right in our garage. (Can you picture me standing on the sidewalk, tilting my head to the right to see if I'm nuts? It happened.)

I go look (after another giant sigh, of course) and sure enough, my right front tire is as FLAT as a pancake. Like, I've never seen a flatter tire in all of my life. (Granted, I don't have super extensive experience in this department, but still.)

Wellllll...isn't this a nice little insertion into the day?

It was 3:30 pm. Georgia had soccer practice at 5. The tire store closed at 6. I had to be at work, 45 minutes away from my house (and after dropping all 3 kids off at different places) at 8:30 am in the morning. NOT. A. GOOD. TIME. FOR. A. FLAT. TIRE!! On the plus side, it was in the garage and I wasn't on the side of the road somewhere. Also on the plus side, sunshine and no snow.

In the end, I called my dad. He got stuck in traffic, so the plan of him helping me take the tire off, loading everyone in his car, dropping me and the tire at the tire store and him taking the kids to G's soccer practice went by the wayside. (The tire store and soccer field for practice were about 1/2 mile apart.) What ended up happening was that the jack in my car was beyond irritating. After about an hour, my dad FINALLY got it to open up (it was stuck) but by then AAA was on the way. (He has a membership, I do not.) In that time, I'd strapped Mason into his carseat in the van, Georgia had the hazard lights going and Mitchell was playing "hockey" using a baseball bat and soccer ball in the front yard. Oh, and the lady coordinating Mason's upcoming speech evaluation called in the middle of all of this.

Might I add, I did make tacos and we all ate. So, ya know - my cape didn't COMPLETELY fall off.

As I finish this, it is now the next morning. I'm sitting by myself in Starbucks, sipping a latte and listening to some pretty relaxing music. I'm also the ONLY woman in here. What is that about?? Don't these men WORK?!

I ended up having to miss my first two appointments of the morning because the tire was beyond repair. I ended up getting four new tires, much to my husband's dismay. I also learned that they do not design tire store sales floors with 20 month old boys in mind. (Just in case you were wondering about that.)

Upon reflection of my day, I'm thankful for the following:
*a van to have flat tires on
*three kids to make me triply nutty
*a husband who loves me despite, well...everything you just read
*a daddy who still takes care of me, even though I am a *huge* pain
*sunny days
*the ability to pay for new tires
*food to eat
*clothes to wash
*a house to clean
*wine to drink (for real!)

Count your blessings, especially when they seem like anything but. Someone would LOVE to have your cruddy day because it would probably be the best one they'd had in a while.

I'll be back more often. I promise. :)

Unwritten...

2009-11-08T10:56:00.000-08:00

So. I have been running for an entire year now. This is truly a bizarre thing for me to say because, well, I really don't like to run.

Here's where I will take a moment and tell you that despite what I have been told by people, I can personally attest to the fact that not *everyone* who runs is "a runner." I think that holds true even if you've been running for quite some time and have made progress in your endurance and speed. To me, you are "a runner" when you SEE yourself as "a runner" and FEEL like you're "a runner."

Have I improved my endurance? Yes. Speed? Yes. Confidence? Yep.
Do I enjoy it any more than I did when I first started? Ummm - not so much, actually.

I still cannot say that I enjoy it. (Really not at all.) I will say that I don't *hate* it, but I enjoy the benefits of running and THAT is why I continue to do it. As for a runner's high or anything like that? Nope. Never. I think that my husband likes me running a lot more than I like me running.

So, anyway - last weekend it was absolutely gorgeous outside and I decided that rather than head to the gym, I'd go for a run. I got all ready to go -- my favorite workout shirt that wicks the sweat away, the undies that don't give me an eternal wedgie while I'm running, my favorite pair of capri exercise pants, my running shoes, my cell phone (in case I get hurt or something), and my iPod. I strapped on my music and headed out the door.

I decided to just "go" and not really plan my route like I normally do. I've gotten to know the basics of how to get around our neighborhood the past few weeks, so I was confident that I had a few different route options available based on how I was feeling. We were taking the kids out to dinner after I got back and I wasn't really all that much in the mood for exercise anyway, so I told Chris when I left that I didn't think I'd go very far. (In my old neighborhood I had an easy little one mile run loop that I did on days like that.)

When I did the couch to 5k program last year, the little guy in my iPod who told me when to run suggested that you *always* do a 5 minute warmup and a 5 minute cooldown. Being the rule follower that I am when it comes to this stuff, I still do it every time. As usual, with about a minute left, I started to dread my walk coming to an end because I knew it meant I had to start running. I get this almost panicky feeling inside, which is well - dumb - because no one is *making* me run. Anyway, I got that wonky feeling and shoved it aside and decided that I would just start and run until I wanted to stop. If it ended up being only five minutes, fine. My goal was twenty minutes, but if I just felt sort of BLAH before then, I gave myself permission to just walk. (Like I said, so NOT "a runner.")

I started off on a part of the sidewalk that was still covered with ice and slush from the previous week's blizzard. I put my foot in a puddle and thought "Greaaaaat. Love the way this is starting out." Ya know, all sorts of positive self talk and things like that! I fiddled around with my iPod until I found some music that made me want to beebop along. I think it may have been "Put a ring on it" or something classy like that.

So, the first part of the route that I followed was down a big hill, which is always nice to just coast along. The second part was relatively flat and up to that point, my biggest issue was dodging more slushy/icy parts of the path. I felt pretty good and wasn't feeling at all like I needed to stop -- I think when I looked it had been about 12 minutes or so. I typically run about 10 minute miles so I knew I'd done at least a mile by then and felt good about that.

And THENNNNNN I got to the bottom of the hill and looked up.

*gulp*

My old neighborhood was really flat and there was just one hill that was challenging and I tended to avoid it like the plague. Since we've moved, I've found that unless I literally run around in a little circle in my immediate neighborhood, I will be running on hills now. The one that I found myself faced with was pretty sizeable. It started gradually but then climbed quite a bit in a relatively short distance. I looked it up on my beloved Map My Run site when I got home (or as I call it, the website for people who don't have a Garmin) and found that I climbed 128 feet on my run, and I guarantee you that at least 100 feet of it was on that hill. That is a LOT for me. (Personally, I think it's a lot for anyone, but especially me.)

So, there I was. Feeling good about my run so far, not feeling like I needed/wanted to stop, was enjoying the weather and running through a new part of our surrounding neighborhood, and WHAMMO. The hill. As I turned the corner and started up the gradual incline, I tried to make a mental game plan. The first thing I did was decide that I was GOING to run up this hill. Not walk, but RUN. Why? Ummm, not sure, but that's what I decided. I also decided that I could not do it alone, so the second thing I did was switch the music on my iPod to what my hubby refers to as my "God Rock." (I believe that I chose "My Deliverer" by Mandisa.) The last thing I did was start reciting Phillipians 4:13 which says "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."

So, NOW, there I was. Running up a ginormous hill, God Rock blarin' in my ears, my power verse running through my mind. Still feeling like this just was not gonna happen because even though I was working as hard as I could at that point, I literally felt like I was almost standing still. I just kept telling myself - RUN. Then my power verse. RUN. Then my power verse. I was not at ALL concerned about a time, I just wanted to run up the hill -- the ENTIRE hill. About halfway up, the hill sort of went back to a more gradual incline instead of a steep grade for about 50 yards or so. It was almost like a little valley because it made my heart sink to see that on the other side of it was another steep grade. I thought "No WAY can I do that again."

Instead of celebrating how far I'd already run up the hardest part of the hill or the fact that I'd actually *kept* runnning instead of just deciding to walk -- I let my limited view of the next challenge suck the wind out of my sails. I accepted a defeated mentality before I'd even arrived at the next hard part. And guess what? When I got closer and started up that portion of the hill, I found that it wasn't nearly as steep as I had thought it would be! I also discovered that I was *really* close to the top.

I kept plugging away and kept my feet a runnin' and as I reached the top of the hill, it struck me how often I do the same thing in my life. Instead of taking a moment to gather my strength, draw on previous successes for motivation and confidence, and refocus my mind -- many times when I find that I'm facing another challenge, I mentally throw in the towel before I even begin. The thing is, just like the top part of that hill, I am pretty good at psyching myself out and making issues and problems bigger than they are or need to be. It's part of my recurring issue where I try to rely solely on myself and don't look to God for the strength, peace, comfort and guidance that I know I'll receive when I ask. Why do I do this over and over??

As I was contemplating those thoughts, I turned the corner and was now headed home. My legs felt like jello, my lungs were burning, and I was sweating like crazy. I just wanted to stop. When I ran in my old neighborhood, I had a few "finish lines" for myself. A tree and a stopsign. The end of a block. Things like that. I decided that I needed a new finish line for my run and decided on the end of the block that I had just started on.

At that point, I was really wanting to just walk. Like REALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLY wanting to walk. I could feel myself starting to play the whole "It's okay to stop here" game with myself because the end of the block (it was a long one) seemed so far away. I decided to put on my favorite motivating song, Unwritten. (If you've never checked out the lyrics, take a second and do it.)

As the first few chords started playing, I looked down and saw a trail of dried blood on the sidewalk. It seemed like someone had a bloody nose or something -- just a trail of drops that I was following. My power verse immediately surged back into my mind. "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." As I kept running, I found that I couldn't take my eyes off of the trail of blood. My heart swelled as I realized that it is *through* Christ and not my own efforts that I am capable of anything. (Obviously, I mean things within reason - I'm not going to try and fly or anything!) But really -- in every instance, when I look back on challenges I've faced in my life -- big ones or small ones, the times that I have felt the most safe, secure, at peace, confident, full of strength are the ones where I have focused on the Lord.

*I* am in charge of how I set my mind. *I* am in charge of how I handle challenges and adversity. *I* am in charge of whether I decide to go it alone or follow Him. He loves me so much that he paid the ultimate price for me, yet I routinely think that I am all I need. (My heart knows better, but so many times that's the way I live.) As I finished out the last part of my run, I found that the trail of blood stopped and I was left with a clean path again. He has wiped my slate clean and by seeking Him and His forgiveness, His mercy has washed all of the hurt and doubt and sorrow and pain and guilt away.

I felt such a sense of gratitude and accomplishment when I reached my new finish line. As I walked home, I put that song on repeat and just soaked it in. Every day *is* unwritten and it *is* up to me to invite Christ into my everyday life and not try to do it all alone. I am in charge of making that choice to follow him and not waste the gift of his mercy and grace when it is just waiting for me to take advantage of. That is my prayer, that I can remember that moment of following the blood stained path and use it to guide my way through challenges and adversity instead of trying to muscle my way through on my own.

Life and what not...

2009-11-08T04:16:00.001-08:00

So much has happened since I last wrote in my blog that I'm not even sure how to try and fill in what's gone on. I have an actual "thing" to write, so I'll catch you up here and then write that stuff separately. Here is the nutshell version of the craziness that has taken place over the past six months, and I'd like to just preface it with saying this: God is so good.

*I went on a trip by myself to Las Vegas with some friends in July. It was way too much fun and I wish I could do it about once a month. We also took a vacation to California in August. I felt really bad about not bringing Mason, but at that time, he was in the stage where he wasn't yet walking but wanted to be on the ground ALL of the time. We took the kids to Disneyland with my parents (well, actually they took us) and Mason stayed with Chris' parents. I felt better about my decision when we were in the park with two perky, energetic kiddos and we were surrounded by people with crying, miserable babies about his age. It was a fabulous trip and the kids had so much fun. We spent one afternoon at the beach and the rest of the trip was all Disney, all the time. There is just something about watching your children experience a feeling of pure joy and wonder that makes your heart swell. Walking through the gates and seeing Mickey Mouse himself standing there signing autographs was one of those moments. They just about burst from excitement and to actually GET his autograph?? Well, it was an event. They still look at their autograph books all of the time. So much fun!

*We decided to give the whole selling our house thing another go so the week before we went to California, we put it back on the market. (If you don't remember, we had it on the market for ten VERY long months right before Mason was born. Tons of showings, not even ONE offer.) This time, we got off of the plane, I turned my phone on and there was a message from our realtor letting us know that someone had made an offer. This was FIVE DAYS after we'd had it on the market. So bizarre! The entire first day of our vacation was spent going back and forth with our realtor through phone calls and faxing documents. We actually worked out the details of the contract while eating a sandwich on Huntington Beach! It was nice to get that all settled the first day and know that we could just enjoy the rest of our trip without fielding phone calls about showings and contract negotiations. It was a pretty stressful month and a half, but we did manage to find a *wonderful* home that we love in a great neighborhood, and closed on the homes on back to back days. We moved ourselves, so I will just let you imagine the fun that was included in that whole ordeal. It's been six weeks since our move and the only area that still has boxes is my husband's office, which I not so lovingly refer to as "The Pit." We don't have anything on the walls yet and have a lot of painting and decorating to do, but we actually feel pretty settled for having been here such a short time. It's nice to actually live in the same neighborhood that our kids' school is in.

*Mason turned one in July. Yes, that's right. Baby Loo is one and is very determined to keep up with his brother and sister at every turn! He's also walking, running, falling, crashing, and generally getting into trouble. He can now reach the top of the kitchen table and desk in the eating nook which in the last week has resulted in a broken dish, a cup of milk poured on his own head, and several tantrums from his sister over stolen princess figurines. I tell Chris that he is the one who will end up being our tattooed, sky diving, motorcycle riding risk taker. He just gets this look in his eye and has this almost cartoon villainish laugh that makes me ultra nervous. I always thought Miss G would be my biggest challenge, but I think ol' Mason is gonna give her a run for her money in that department! He is starting to try and talk more and more every day. He has a few signs that he uses a lot and has a couple of words he can say: bye bye, mama, dada, and uh-oh are about it at this point. Mostly we hear a whole bunch of very interesting, animated stories that sound like this:
Mason: DADABABAmamamaDABAMA!!
Us: Really? Is that true?
Mason: MAMADAbadamamamadadababaBAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! (These types of stories are also usually followed by a very mischevious "hahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!")

*Mitchell is in first grade and although it's only the first week of November, is now at his second school. He is doing fabulously and makes us very proud just by being the best Mitchell he can be! We had to move him from the school he started the year in when we moved, and it was a really hard decision for us to do that but has worked out great. He has made some really nice friends at his new school and is happy there. My current worry is that I don't have anyone's contact information. His teacher was so nice and sent a note home with some of the kids before they tracked off for three weeks, but obviously she can't give us their information without their permission so I am just praying that the parents feel motivated to at least email us with their email address. His birthday is in a few weeks and I would feel so badly if we had no way to get in touch with the families of the kids he wants to invite. We signed up for cub scouts but I totally underestimated the time commitment there. Most of the activities are from 6:30 - 8:30 pm and in addition to that making a very late night for Mitchell, many times it would mean I'd either have to get a sitter or take the other two with me, and well -- that's just not gonna happen. We are thinking about starting him in karate instead. I'm really looking forward to some special one on one time these next few weeks with him while Miss G is in preschool and Mason is sleeping.

*Georgia is back in preschool and loving it! The biggest day of the month for her is when it's her turn to be snack helper. I wouldn't be surprised if she prepared a speech. (The name of the snack helper and what they brought is also the first piece of news I receive when I pick her up from school each day. It's quite the snazzy position in her eyes, apparently.) She just started gymnastics and is super psyched to get back into that again. Her teacher assures me that klutzy kids make fabulous gymnasts, which is a relief since she managed to cut her forehead once and her right eye twice in about 6 weeks' time this summer. (Three scars, three stitches and one dermabond application resulted.) She is an expert at being three, especially when it comes to the associated drama and tantrums. Georgia is currently obsessed with rhyming and spends a lot of her day doing just that. "Shoe to who." "Me to he." Alllll day long. The trip to Disneyland took her love of all things princess to a whole new level and the little figurines that we brought back are her most prized possessions. She also has a very distinctive "princess voice" that she uses almost more than her actual voice. Her current favorite game to play with Mommy is "Cinderella." She loves it when I'm the stepsisters/mother and she's Cinderella, so it usually means I get to grab a magazine and a cup of coffee, lay on her bed and tell her to fetch me stuff. The other day I got realllllllllyyyy into my role and tossed the fake peas on the floor because they were cold. I thought she was gonna pee her pants from laughing so hard...she is my biggest fan and is really helping my acting come along! *teehee*

*Chris is still working hard! I can't really get into details, but his job has been VERY stressful lately, and it's just so hard to feel like you can't help at all. He is such a wonderful husband and Daddy...I just wish I could take some of the stress away from him. Anyway - he is still all about soccer and just finished another season. He is like a kid with the whole thing -- it's so good for him!! His drive isn't any longer than it used to be but in order to keep it that way he has to leave about a half an hour earlier than normal, so that took some getting used to on his part. Football and basketball season always make for a happy Chris on the weekends, especially now that we have a new giant HD flatscreen tv. I am actually really surprised he didn't sleep on the couch that first night or two! He looks fabulous and has done a great job of keep his 45-50 pounds off...he had to get some new clothes and fits into some that he hasn't worn for years. (I have tried to tell him that he might just want to replace them with something a little more updated. Not so much.)

*As for me, I am still just plugging along. It's funny, when I wasn't ready to take any more clients on, I got referrals all of the time. Now that I'm ready to work a bit more, it's sort of been a struggle to find new clients. In all honesty though, I haven't really worked too hard at it since I've been trying to get settled in the new house, so I think I'll give that a better effort here after the holidays. I am enjoying our new home and all of the extra space that we have. It's been wonderful for the kids to have their own rooms and to have an actual PLAYROOM for all of their stuff!! Makes me so happy to have two tiny little baskets of toys and books that are out of the way in the living room and everything else in the basement where, even if it's a ginormous mess, I don't have to see it or step over it all of the time. I still am taking myself to the gym on a regular basis and have managed to maintain my weight loss. Right now, I'm 60 pounds lighter than I was when I had Mason. I'm sort of disappointed that I've been plateaued for the last six months, but given what's gone on, I guess I should see it as a victory that I haven't gained anything back. I've recently recharged my efforts and am hoping to start seeing a loss again. I have about 25 more pounds to say goodbye to, and I know that they will be the hardest ones yet. It's such hard work!!

I think you are now officially caught up on the Loo family happenings. It feels good to be back in bloggy land, and I really do think I'll be here more often. I have updated my recipes with two of our faves and will also update my menu plan, as I still plan our meals the same way. (Sad that one of the days still said "Christmas Party" next to it. Yikes.)

I will leave you with a picture of the kiddos from our recent blizzard. (I know Miss G's eyes are closed. Trust me when I say, this was the best of the bunch.) *sigh* It's hard to believe how big they're getting! Gotta love Colorado though -- this was last weekend. This weekend it was 75!

Until next time, love and hugs to all of my bloggy friends. *mwah!*

Back in the saddle...

2009-05-19T12:19:00.000-07:00

Do you ever have something you think about, maybe think a LOT about, and then it starts floating around you? Maybe you notice it once and think "Huh! How funny...I was *just* thinking of that" and go on your merry way until it pops up more and more frequently until it finally gets to the point where you decide that maybe you are just a tad bit dense and that God has been patiently tapping you on the shoulder over and over.

No? Just me, then? Mmmm-hmmm.

Well, even if it is just me, that is the story of me and my lack of blogging. Last summer I became the publicity chick for my MOPS group. That required me to publish a newsletter every month. That required (well, probably not required) me to write a little "thing" for the front page every month. That seemed to pretty much zap any creative juices or desire to blog that I may have had.

My publicity days are now behind me and wouldn't you know it? My thoughts about coming back here to blog were soon surrounded by questions and comments from different people that I know...all leading me back to the fact that I need to start writing again. For me. (By that, I mean actually going beyond updating my status on Facebook.)

Sooooooooooooo, here I am!

I guess maybe next time I will get all writerish and dive back in, but for now...how about an update on my little family? I believe I will even start with myself instead of the kids for once!

I guess I'll start with the thing that seems to be my biggest "thing" at the moment -- I am still on a quest to lose ALL of the weight that I need to. I just had that fabulous, good time "yearly visit" with my doctor last week and the target weight that she suggested is about 26 pounds below where I currently am. *sigh* I know that I can do it, but it sure does seem daunting. I was moving along at a pretty good clip with my weight loss for quite a few months and I seem to have hit sort of a wall here lately. Since I started trying to lose weight, I've lost 32 pounds. (I've actually lost 24 more than that - but you know, that was baby weight stuff, so I don't really count that.) The thing is, I've only lost like 6 or 7 pounds in about 8 weeks. Not fun; however, I know that the whole weight loss journey comes with periods of plateau and regression along with bursts of great drops. Those big chunks of weight loss are so much more fun than the plateaus though -- I tell ya!

A great victory for myself is that Chris and I did in fact run a 5K together at the end of April. My goal was to finish under 35 minutes but I surprised the socks off of myself by doing it in 32:45! Amazing. All God. Seriously. Allllllllllllllllll God on that one. I should probably add that I know Chris could have seriously smoked me but he hung in there with me and just ran along side me. (Right up until about the last two tenths of a mile when I was just *d.y.i.n.g.* and I told him to just GO. He likes to sprint at the end and while that sounds really inspiring to me and everything, I was having a very serious conversation with myself that pretty much went like this: "RUN. NO WALKING. RUN. NO WALKING.") As it turns out, I didn't walk at ALL and that was huge. That's really all I wanted, even if it would have taken me an hour to finish. I wanted to run the whole thing and I did! I can't put into words how proud that sweet husband of mine is of me about that. It's so touching to think about because even though I really am proud of myself, it's like he is proud of me on a whole different level and it just feels amazing to be loved like that.

Oh, and I have recently started doing spinning classes. If you have never tried one of these classes, do yourself a favor and keep that streak alive. Unless, of course, you're into things like torturing yourself for an hour. I mean, seriously people -- forget the waterboarding! Spinning is where it's at in the cruel and unusual punishment department. I did finally get myself a gel padded bootie cushion that I used today. Mehhhh - I'm sure it worked but I couldn't focus on anything but my burning thighs and inability to breathe long enough to decide if my tushie was more comfy on the bike or not this morning. I *hate* that class. H.A.T.E. it!!! But I try to go once a week. Does that give you some idea as to the desperation I am feeling to bust through this stupid plateau of mine??!!

We now have the most amazing next door neighbors. They are as nice as can be and I have found a true friend over there. "Miss Aaaameee" as Miss G calls her, is my kids' new BFF. Get this: not only is she like the nicest person you'll ever meet, but she has a clean house, two kids (well, technically they are dogs), a popcorn machine, sells tupperware and LOVES to babysit. More than that -- she loves to babysit MY kids. It's kind of like the best thing ever. Oh -- and triple bonus, she and I both enjoy wine. Like one glass, maybe two, tops. So once a week or so, she'll come over while I'm making dinner and we'll have a glass of wine. Having a husband who can't STAND wine makes me want to pee my pants with excitement that I get to share a glass of wine with a good friend while I cook. And seriously? The woman humors the kids and lets them make her all sorts of fake things to eat, lets Mason drool on her -- you name it. She is FABULOUS and I feel so blessed to have her in my life.

Other than that, things are pretty much the same. As I mentioned before, I'm done with my run on the steering team for MOPS. I will miss the teamwork and Bible study and getting to see my friends every week, but I'm pretty excited to just be a MOPS mom again. I have agreed to help coordinate the volunteer stuff at the preschool again next year -- BUT -- this time there are three of us doing it together, so it feels MUCH more manageable. I still volunteer there a lot as it is, so it won't be that drastic of a change.

Even with trying to cut things out and say no to other things, I am still busier than I want to be. I believe this will be a life-long problem for me, as I just seem to fill up my calendar, even when I don't want to. Thankfully, we aren't overbooked (yet) this summer, so I'm hoping for lots of fun adventures with the kiddos.

Okay -so I have run out of time for this update and would you look at that? It was all about me! That never happens!! You know what though? Probably exactly the way it was supposed to , as I really have been feeling led to write more for me -- get myself mentally unpacked over here again. Hopefully I can start making the bloggy rounds again, too - I miss reading all of my bloggy buddies' stuff, too!

So. Consider my toe officially dipped into the pool again. It feels good to settle back in.

A little rusty...

2009-02-14T07:03:00.000-08:00

Well, since Emily called me out (on my blog and on the phone, too!) about not blogging yet this year, I decided I'd try to remedy that this morning.

Letsee - to catch up...

Mason is now 6 months old. Yes, I said 6 months. Impossible, it seems - but true. He is SO funny and keeps us all cracking up. He is so easy going and happy...even moreso if he can see what his big brother and sister are up to. Last week he started making this happy sound that sounds like tires squealing in a big peel out. (I'm sure there's a more correct technical term but that's my best thinking at the moment.) He is sitting up on his own for short periods of time and has just last week started eating cereal, which he thinks is pretty funny. He is pretty happy to roll around and around and around on the floor and is pretty adept at the inchworm/almost army crawl thing. The kid can MOVE. (Uh-oh, says mom.)

Georgia will be 3 in two weeks. Yes, I said 3. Again - how did this happen?? Our big, giant, HISTORIC news over here is that -- SHE IS DONE POTTY TRAINING!! Can I get a big WOOT, WOOT!! I figured out the "trick" for Miss G was taking ALLLLL of her panties, dresses, skirts and tights and holding them for ransom in my closet. If she wanted to wear them, she had to poop in the potty. If not, it was dreaded PANTS for our little diva. If she pooped in the potty she could start the day with a dress, but if she landed some in her pullup that day, she had to change into (gasp!) pants on the spot. Took about 2 weeks of that business and we just haven't looked back. She is hysterical and always keeps me laughing. I think we got our point across that we are happy and proud of her for being a good girl with the potty training. The other day after Chris told her how how proud he was of her she said (word for word), "It's my pleasure to poop on the potty, Daddy!" That would be her in a nutshell. Her current faves include playing babies, kitchen, playdough, and coloring. Oh, and swiping trains/track from her brother and running away screaming. Good times. Did I mention that the girl LOVES to do laundry? I'm guessing by the time she's old enough to *actually* do it on her own, she'll hate it.

Mitchell is 6 years old and full of spunk. Or something. What I mean is that I think 6 year old boys might just be a tad bit insane. I mean that in the best possible way. He turned 6 and this ginormous GOOFBALL syndrome invaded his body. He is just SILLY. He is also a reading machine and can't get enough of it. Loves to read. Still a full-fledged train addict who is not wild about letting his sister share his stuff. Daily screaming and chasing and crying from both of them in this department. Makes me ~~sort of~~ cranky. He loves kindergarten and thinks carpooling is the bee's knees.

As for Chris - working like a crazy man. He is dangerously addicted to all things soccer. It is kind of nuts, actually. All the gear, tivo'd games of all of these European teams, even a big ol' soccer magazine. Wild. Can't relate but it makes him happy, so there ya go. I sure do love that guy. We had a date night the other night and it was so fun. We didn't do anything exciting, just went to the bar in our neighborhood, had a few cocktails and then went and had some hotwings. It seriously reminded me of the pre-kids Chris and Tara. I haven't said that for a long time. We just celebrated our 7th anniversary last week. I feel so, so, SO lucky to have him as my hubby. I love that Cabana Boy!

As for me, just same ol', same ol'. Everyone is still sick all of the time. I actually decided to get in on the fun this time. You know, 'cause I'm bored and stuff. It is so bizarre to say that I actually miss going to the gym. Between me being sick and Mason being sick, I've been once in 2 weeks. I ran outside one other time, but that's it. Hope everything I worked so hard for isn't completely undone. Last time I ran, I went 3 miles. Amazing!! Seriously, amazing. Chris and I are running a 5K together this spring. I bet it will be a good feeling to reach the finish line together. Actually, he would probably have time to finish, shower, change and take some pictures by the time I get there...but knowing my sweet Cabana Boy, he'll run slow with his pokey wife. I have lost 10 pounds since Christmas, so that's good. I still have a LONG way to go, but I want to lose at least 6 more by the end of March. I will be sporting a strapless bridesmaid gown and would like to not scare my sweet friend's guests away with my bye-bye arms. If you don't know what they are, be thankful. If you do, I need not say more.

Okay. There you go. An update. Next time I might even thrill you with some pictures. And to my bloggy friends -- I really would like to start making the rounds again. I'll see if I can figure that out soon. In the meantime, hi and hugs. :)

Happy Valentine's Day, everyone!

Mini-Me Friday #7ish

2008-12-12T12:17:00.000-08:00

A month? Seriously? I haven't blogged in a month? Hmmmm. I guess that must be right!

Wellll, a lot can happen in a month, as we all know. Things like traveling to Albuquerque for a long weekend, Thanksgiving, your first "baby" turning six years old. (Ouch. Still hurts to type that one.)

I am happy to report that although I have been MIA over here, I have NOT completely derailed myself from my weight loss efforts. It is actually amusing for me to report that I actually went jogging...me, jogging, I said...on Thanksgiving morning to "earn" my big ol' meal! I mean, people -- JOGGING. On Turkey Day. This is big change. Big.

So.

Basically, here's the update. I found this program through word-of-mouth from a great friend (who has a blog but no actual BLOG there or I'd hook you up -- subtle hint that I would like her to blog, isn't it?? she knows who she is.) and downloaded these podcasts to my iPod. So now I jog with good ol' Robert 3 times a week. I did day one of week 4 this morning and Robert -- whoo, he had me questioning whether or not this was such a good idea. BUT, I did it.

And, for all of you Biggest Loser fans out there -- I am pleased to tell you that both Vicky and Heba are good for something, after all. I just pictured them running on either side of me and told myself two things: (a) if THEY could run, I could run and (b) if I quit -- it would be a bad omen for Michelle, so I had to keep running if I wanted to give her some mojo. And guess what? I did it. So. Those two evil, scheming *ahem* women (this is me not cursing at them) actually kept me running this morning...who knew?

Okay. So we have one week left for our group before this session ends. I weighed in last night for the first time in 4 weeks -- I missed because the kids were sick, I was sick, Thanksgiving, and a snow cancellation -- and I was down 5 lbs from my last weigh in! This was very exciting to me because...

It means that I am only 1/2 pound over the weight that I was when I got pregnant with Mason and have now lost 38 pounds since having him! Yay!!!!! I'm also only 17 pounds over my lowest weight -- that was right before I got pregnant with Miss G, so June 2005. I'm so happy about that!

My first goal is 7 lbs.
My second goal is 17 lbs. I'd love to do this by April, as I am in my best friend's wedding and will be in a strapless gown.
My ultimate goal is 37 lbs. This seems more within my reach now that I realize I've already lost that much. Funny how your brain needs little things like that. Or my little brain, I should say.

I am just taking it one day at a time and trying not to be too crazy or obsessed. I'm also trying to be realistic about things. For instance, I have a date night tomorrow with my husband. We have a Christmas party at one of his co-worker's houses and will probably end up out for drinks with friends or by ourselves later. So...my typical Friday cheating will not be happening. Nor have I had a glass of wine while I cooked dinner this week. (My favorite thing!! Love to do that.)

Anyway- there's the update. Have a long way to go but am proud of myself for the hard work I've put in so far. I'm giving all the glory to God though -- He has certainly provided me with a team of loving, supporting, encouraging people to cheer me on, and most importantly -- the strength and courage to do what I need to do.

He is so good. So very, very good.

Tag, I'm It!

2008-11-13T14:31:00.000-08:00

Okay, so my friend, Jamie, tagged me for a little Meme. Yesterday I said I blew off a large portion of my day doing computerish stuff and my adorably preggo buddy, Emily, asked me if that meant I blogged. Nope, sadly. So, here is a no-brainer. (Right up my alley.) Actually though, I'm trying not to repeat what I've already said here , here , here and here. Hmmm...

Here are the rules:

1. Link to the person or persons who tagged you. (Good, aren't I?)
2. Post the rules on your blog. (Seriously, I'm so on top of this.)
3. Write six random things about yourself. (Will do.)
4. Tag six people at the end of your post and link to them. (Readers beware.)
5. Let each person know they’ve been tagged and leave a comment on their blog (Mental note.)
6. Let the tagger know when your entry is up. (Jamie, I am doing a Meme. Just FYI.)

Six Random Tara Facts...

1. When I was little, my brother and I used to play "trucking company" together. He would haul (I have no idea what) around the house in his play semi truck and I would stay in my room. We had a phone that was disconnected, so I'd use that and I had a spiral. I would take messages for him and make appointments for him to take things to various parts of the country. I wonder if he remembers that. I always had fun. (Probably because I was bossing him around and telling him where to go, when to go, and what to take.)

2. I put deodorant and perfume on every single time I take a shower. Even if it's midnight and I'm going to bed. I just do.

3. I talk in my sleep. Chris has had some interesting conversations with me before (actually - more like conversations with me where he thinks I'm an idiot), only to find out that I'm asleep. I used to take orders in the middle of the night when I was a waitress.

4. I love tractors. Never been on one. Not sure why I like them, but I just do.

5. I love to dip fritos in cottage cheese. I know it sounds gross, but seriously - YUM. I blame my mom -- she introduced me to this little snack gem. (By the way, we never have fritos in the house, so I would say I eat this about twice a year.)

6. I could probably make an entire meal out of the relish tray. Olives, pickles, peppers, etc. Those empty, salty calories -- yeah. I am all about the relish tray. And my grandma used to make these things called watermelon pickles...I didn't like them so much when I was growing up but I would like to try them now. I wonder if she still has her recipe somewhere? I should ask!

Okay. There ya go. If you haven't blogged in the last two weeks, now you have something to blog about because I'm tagging you!

Mini-Me Friday #6

2008-11-07T08:36:00.000-08:00

I know I skipped a week. Here's a recap: started working out, didn't do so good on the eating front, gained a half pound.

Fast forward to this most recent week. Our "homework" from group was to pick one of the 9 commitments (prayer, attendance, scripture reading, verse memorization, encouragement, exercise, Live-It -- eating plan, the Commitment Record -- food journal, and Bible study) that you needed to really improve on and just go for it. I picked the Live-It (eating plan) and the CR since they go hand-in-hand and since I'd completely blown it the week before on both of them. When you draw a big ? on two days worth of the CR simply to avoid having to actually SAY what and how much you ate...probably not a good sign. At least there was plenty of room for improvement.

So. I had a GREAT week. I made it to the gym four days this week and can say that I worked hard the entire time I was there. Sore, but not TOO sore...just how I like it. I also just decided I'd write it all down. Good, bad, ugly, whatever. I know I'm loved and supported in my group, not judged or shamed AT ALL, so that wasn't it. It's all about me. Just overcoming my "stuff" of which there is a LOT to overcome. Shooo-weee. Lots of it. Funky junk in my emotional basement that needs some cleaning out, if you know what I mean.

Anyway- I can just tell you this. I went out to dinner twice, had four glasses of wine, stayed up late one night munching on snacks with the hubster, ate my way through a big ol' tub of frozen yogurt and STILL lost 3.5 lbs!! That was the most victorious feeling I've had in quite some time, and I am telling you now -- God is in charge of this whole thing.

HE gets my butt outta bed at 5 am. I mean, really - it's my nursing boobs, but come on. Who invented those? :) I jam my way through my workouts with some great praise and worship music -- my "God Rock" as Chris likes to call it. I get some major prayer time in while I'm doing situps and pushups. Mostly just calling out to Him to help me do 2 more. Okay, two MORE. Alright, two MORE. (Welcome to the inside of my head during workouts...scary, huh?)

Seriously. Between that, completing the Bible study for my group, sharing at the actual meetings with those amazing women, and my fantastically supportive hubby - it's hard for me not to give all the glory for this to God. He has pretty much set me up for success by giving me the tools and people in my life that I need in order to be on the right track. I'm sure that sounds hokey, but it is a fact for me.

So. Guess what happened when those 3.5 lbs came off? Two things.

1. Maternity clothes are being packed up FOR GOOD (I mean it this time!!) today.
2. My old "skinny jeans" fit on Wednesday. Thank goodness for stretch denim, I say. I didn't say they fit WELL, but I wore them out in public because everything else was still wet from the washing machine. I didn't get booed or whispered at, so I'm taking that as a good sign.

All in all, a very good week for me. Like many of you, it was a pretty emotional week with the whole pre-and-during-and-post election "stuff". It felt nice to have some peace amid all of the turbulence.

Okay, can't give you my memory verse for this week because I didn't memorize it. (I continue to have a lot of commitments to pick from in the room for improvement category.) Instead, I will leave you with a link to a song that I seriously can JAM OUT with. I saw her do this song live at the Women Of Faith conference in September and got hooked on it. I am not kidding and being entirely serious when I say that on Wednesday morning, I had to restrain myself from flat out DANCING on the treadmill. Lucky for you, I have found the song, complete with dancers!! This song just speaks to me and makes me wanna get funky. Pretty much, picture me as these kids on the treadmill. Only less coordinated and a lot older. And bigger. And really tired with 5 am ponytail hair. Hmmmm...maybe I should get some camo sweat pants and just go for it? Yeah, probably not.

Enjoy my new fave: "Shackles" by Mandisa and have a wonderful weekend!!

Some kidbits...

2008-11-01T19:37:00.000-07:00

I haven't taken the time to keep track of some of the funnies that have happened around here lately, so here are a few from the past few days. It's hard to stay grumpy some days with stuff like this being said! Oh, and just so you know, any time you see the words "And don't forget..." from Miss G, picture her holding her right index finger up in the air like you do to get a hot dog from the vendor going up and down the aisles at the baseball game. It's her new thing.

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Mommy: You're doing such a great job going potty, Georgia!

Miss G: Yeah. I love to go potty!

Mommy: You're almost ready for big girl panties. You just need to start going poop in the potty.

Miss G: And don't forget PEE!!

****************************************************
Mitchell: I'm ready to go outside.

Miss G: Me, three!

Mitchell: It's "Me, too" not "Me, three."

Miss G: It's me, too.

****************************************************
Last night when we were trick or treating on our block, this adorable little black dog followed us from house to house. He was obviously loose from someone's house in the neighborhood, but he didn't have on tags and didn't want anyone to get too close. He didn't growl, he'd just back away. Mitchell was really concerned about him. When he got up this morning we were talking about how much fun we had last night...

Mitchell: Mommy, what happened to the little dog?

Mommy: I don't know, buddy. Hopefully he found his way home.

Mitchell: I wish I could have helped him. Batman ALWAYS helps save lost little puppy dogs on halloween, you know.

Mommy: Awwww.

***************************************************
At breakfast this morning....

Mitchell: Can I have a treat when I'm done with breakfast?

Mommy: Hmmmm. Probably. Just one and only if you eat all of your eggs.

Miss G: Me, three! (seriously. she says that.)

Mitchell: And Mason, too!

Mommy: Well, Mason can't have a treat.

Mitchell: Sure he can. His MILK can be his treat!

***************************************************
While I was making dinner last night, Mitchell and Georgia were each laying under a blanket on a separate sofa in the living room, pretending to sleep. After a few minutes, they started to run laps around the kitchen table. I told them to go play in the living room for a little bit and that dinner was almost ready.

Miss G: Let's play Mommy & Daddy!

Mitchell: Nahhhh, we just DID that! Let's read books.

Daddy: When did you play Mommy & Daddy?

Mitchell: When we were asleep on the couch.

Mommy & Daddy: Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!

***************************************************
Here are some pictures of our little trick or treating trio...by the way - Georgia called her wig her "crazy hair" and Mitchell was quite upset that his outfit was missing the yellow belt that the picture on the package showed. That's what happens when you go for the cheapo craigslist costume, dude. Oh - and I think I should say that out of the whole big bucket of yummy treats that they collected last night, both of them were most excited to eat -- their chips. A bag of cheetos for Mitchell and a bag of fritos for Miss G. Too funny! Have a great weekend!

Fun at the pumpkin farm...

2008-10-26T05:29:00.000-07:00

We had so much fun at the pumpkin farm last year that we decided to go back to the same one this year! We all had a great time and the weather was gorgeous, minus a steady wind...but hey, that's what you get in late October on the plains of Colorado. (Actually, I think that's what you get year-round out there.)

I realized on the way home that we didn't get a single picture of Mason while we were there, but trust me. All you would have seen was a picture of the stroller with blanket covering it. No one saw him and he didn't see anything but the back of his eyelids, so I don't feel too badly. We have more than enough pictures of him in his carseat by now! (Isn't it funny how many of those sleeping and/or in the carseat, or sleeping in the carseat pictures you end up with, by the way?)

In any case, here's our day in pictures. Well, sort of. I was kind of a slacker with the camera this year. Anyway - I'll put a couple of videos at the end of the haystack jumping, which was noteworthy for two reasons: (1) We were in awe that the little two year old boy who would completely freak out with fear at the thought of going down a little gymboree slide was now a risk-taking almost 6 year old, jumping with glee off of a haystack tower and (2) I didn't have to take my husband to the hospital for another knee surgery after all. (Thank you, Lord!)

I hope you are all enjoying this beautiful season as much as we are! Happy Fall!

Waiting for Daddy to pay for our tickets.

Feeding the ducks and fish is fun!

Proudly emerging from our successful trip through the corn maze! (Which is amazing, considering that I was the navigator.)

Gotta love the good ol' barrel train! Daddy took one for the team while Mommy took pictures. Doesn't he look thrilled? His expression makes me giggle.

And now...for some haystack jumping.

Mini-Me Friday #5

2008-10-24T05:02:00.000-07:00

Okay, I skipped a week. Sorry - my husband was gone for almost an entire week, so I passed over a few things. Cleaning the house and blogging were two of them. ANYWAY...

Last week, I lost 1.5 lbs -- which I highly suspect was more than that, since I am betting I had previously gained something -- and this week, I lost another 1.5 lbs. SO...I am down a total of 5 pounds so far. I'm happy about that! Only 15 more to go and I'll have met my goal for this session of our group meetings. I think I figured out I needed to lose about 1.5 per week to make that happen, so I am on my way!

One thing that I've done for myself this week is...I JOINED A GYM!!! Hooray! I am so stinkin' excited about this, I just cannot even TELL you! A woman in our group said that they were having "blowout" prices for memberships right now. I used to belong there - it's an all-women gym, which I absolutely love...so I went to check it out. She was right -- it was a great deal! (For starters, they were taking $100 of the $125 registration fee off, if that tells you anything.) I could have gotten an even better deal if I'd signed up for three years, but I am having some FAITH that we are going to sell our house this spring, so I only signed up for one year and am hoping to have to join a new gym next fall.

As for when I'll be going...well, I'm gonna be back to my crack of dawn workout ways. The gym opens at 5:30 am and I plan to be there waiting for them to turn the key! Chris doesn't leave most days until around 7:00, so that will give me time to workout for at least an hour and run home to get everyone going. On the days that he needs to go in early, he will just come home by 7:30 so that I can work out before they close at 9:00 pm. I think it is going to be just fine, actually. Not only do I want to avoid paying the daycare costs, but ya know - my kids are around enough germs as it is...no need to push our luck.

So. There ya go. Did MUCH better with sticking to my eating plan this week and I exercised 4 times, even before I joined the gym. I feel like I'm starting to turn the corner and am excited about making more progress each week. By the way - if any of you are hoping to downsize yourselves, feel free to join me and do some Mini-Me updates of your own!

Here's my verse for this week...
Ephesians 6:11 "Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes."

If ya don't like poop stories, come back later.

2008-10-21T13:56:00.000-07:00

Hey. I warned you. Right up there on top. I mean business.

Last night I made dinner. Yummy dinner. Chicken manicotti, garlic bread, and salad. Even oatmeal raisin cookies for dessert.

By the way - can anyone guess why we had such a well rounded dinner? Yes, MOPS mommies - you probably guessed it. I took dinner to a new mom and made the same thing for us. It's like the only time I include a dessert. Anyone else do that or is it just me?? Anyway...

Chris got tied up (not literally, don't worry) at work so I was had the kids eat early and figured I'd wait and eat with my hubster when he got home from work. Yum, yum - everyone eats and Miss G decides she's done.

So.

I say "Are you ready for me to clean you up so you can get down?"
She says "Ummm, I got some poop."
I say "No problem, let's just change your diaper then."

I walk over and whoooooooooooooo. She sure did have some poop - it was stinkin' to high heaven in that little pink booster seat of hers! So, I put the changing pad on the floor in the living room, grab the wipes and go get her. She starts FREAKING OUT when I'm trying to take her pants off. I'm like what is the deal??? (Oh, and I hear the garage door go up right about this time, so he hears her getting all nuts.) I get her calmed down, assure her everything is okay and she's fine.

So, I lay her down -- looks like a mini-blowout. You know the one. Slightly on the waistband of the pants and a tiny bit on her lower back. No biggie. I've seen worse.

(Ha, ha, ha, ha. I can hear my husband laughing at me right about here.)

Take her diaper off and ohhhh, my word. The stink. VERY stinky. UNUSUALLY stinky. As in gag stinky. My hubby walks around the corner right about now and brilliantly says, "How's it goin'?" Yeah. I think I managed to lock eyes while rolling them at the same time, and possibly may have grunted in his direction as well. Mitchell is a doll and runs upstairs to get her pajamas for me so that after I'm done washing off her back she can just jump in her jammies.

Mitchell comes back downstairs and says "Hey, Mom - is that poop on your shirt?" I look down and see a little spot where I was attacked by my spoon when tasting the sauce for the manicotti. I say "Nope. Just spaghetti sauce." Chris says "It really does look like she pooped on you." I say "Nope. Just sauce." Meanwhile I'm thinking that he's the one who gets pooped on in this house.

Back to the massive cleanup. Luckily it was trash night so Chris was on his way out to the curb with the trash anyway, so I just added the toxic grocery bag to his collection. Georgia is fresh n' clean, in her jammies, so I squirt her hands with the antibacterial stuff that I should buy stock in -- and she gets up to go play. I go toss her clothes into the washer on the soak setting and then head to the kitchen to wash my hands. Wash them up and am drying them when Chris comes back in.

I said to him "You know, I must really have been bothered by that stink because I can still REALLY smell it!" He said "It's fresh in your mind. It'll pass." Two seconds later, as he's helping me clear the table, he says..."Well, I think I know what you're smelling."

Yeah. A nice little pile of poop on her booster seat. DIS-GUS-TING. It was so gross. *By the way, I figured out this is why she was freaking out. She must have felt the poop come out when I picked her up or something.* SOOOOO, he goes to get the lysol for me while I scoop the poop. Together we manage to get all of the straps out of the chair so that they can join her clothes in the washing machine. I remember that there is another set of clothes that could use some soaking so I ask Chris to grab those for me.

He comes into the laundry room and I say "You know, I can STILL smell that poop! It just WON'T leave my nose!" He says "Well, why don't you just toss your clothes in there, too. Maybe that's it?"

Okay, just so you know, I'm literally sitting here giggling as I type this.

I take off my shirt and OH. MY. GOODNESS. There are two HUGE smears of poop on my shirt!! One is under my big ol' left nursing boob and one is on the sleeve of the left arm. My boobs are big enough at this point that they hid the poop from my sight...how sad is that? I started cracking up and said "Oh my gosh! There's poop all over my shirt!!"

Chris says "We tried to tell you that, but you said it was just sauce."
I laugh and point to my tiny little smear of sauce and say "THIS is the sauce. THIS (big, giant smears) is the poop!"
My hubby says "Well, I know you - and being in the position you were in, I wasn't about to argue with you about what spaghetti sauce looks like. I figured you probably wouldn't like that."

Smart man, that Cabana Boy! I hope you got as big of a laugh out of this as we did. I was about crying I was laughing so hard. We both agreed that this was another of life's very bloggable moments.

Not-So-Wordless Wednesday - Gettin' Crafty.

2008-10-15T06:27:00.000-07:00

My friend Jenn inspired me to do some crafts with my kiddos yesterday. I had this package of pipe cleaners, pom poms, and googley eyes sitting in the cabinet, so I whipped them out and now we're all decorated! (Seriously - that's all we used...markers, construction paper, glue and scissors. I'm not into very involved crafts.)

The top pumkin is Miss G's, the bottom is Mitchell's. He named his "Stinky" as you can see at the bottom of his page. The spiders were fun, too. Mine's on the left, Mitchell's is in the middle, and Miss G's is on the right. She kept knocking everyone's spider head off before the glue dried (shocking, I know), so those took a while to dry before we could hang them up. The kids LOVED it. I think we're going to make some leaf picture placemats today. Anyway - here's how they turned out!

Mini-Me Friday #3

2008-10-10T12:59:00.000-07:00

So, I'm not very Mini, I'm guessing. I had to skip my meeting last night because of a stomach "issue" which has since resolved itself, but it was a bad week.

I am working on not eating everything in sight, even if it's not such a bad choice food-wise. Having to write it all down and see the number of exchanges I have allowed for the day go clicking off just well, it stinks, pretty much. I like to eat. I'm hungry a lot. So, now I'm trying to figure out if I'm REALLY hungry a lot or if I'm just bored. Or tired. Or worried. Or sad.

Basically, I'm trying to figure out what is motivating me to be so hungry. (And before you suggest it, I've allowed plenty of breastfeeding calories.)

So. There ya go. I still like food. I still like a lot of it. Sort of a problem in the mini-me category.

Oh, and I worked out twice last week. We dealt with sick kids but that's a whole different Oprah so I'll just leave it at that.

My verse this week was Proverbs 20:4 "May He give you the desires of your heart and make all of your plans succeed."

I have to laugh...this week, the desires of my heart involved macaroni & cheese, chocolate, pizza, etc. Probably a good thing that they weren't given to me in the literal sense. Ha!

A hubby quiz...

2008-10-04T10:45:00.001-07:00

A Saturday is a good day to have a post where I don't have to think so I have decided to copy someone. Cheri had a cute hubby quiz and I have decided to take it.

I really wanted to know if I was right on these, so I am going to ask him the same questions. I'll put my answers in blue and his in red, if they were different. Hopefully we'll just see a lot of blue, which will mean he said the exact same thing. By the way, he's downstairs making the kids lunch and I'm up here cleaning the bathroom. (Seriously, that's what I'm "doing".) I just called him on his cell phone to get the answers. I'm sure he'll be really pleased. NOT. Oh, and that smell? Fish sticks. They are sure stinky when you don't know what they are! Anyway, on to the quiz.

1. Sitting in front of the TV, what's on the screen?
Fox News or ESPN.
Either sports or a documentary. Like the history or military channel or something like that.
Oh yeah, I forgot about those.

2. You're out to eat; what kind of dressing does he get on his salad?
Blue Cheese. And lots of it.

3. What's one food he doesn't like?
Tomatoes. And onions. He hates them both.
Sushi.
Me, too.

4. Where did he go to high school?
Machebuef High School

5. What size shoe does he wear?
11 1/2.
He said "Eleven point five."
Nerd alert.

6. If he was to collect anything, what would it be?
Hoodie sweatshirts from different colleges or aircraft carrier hats. He already has a bunch of both.
Either baseball gear or historical memorabilia.
When I read him my answer, he said mine was better.
DUH.

7. What is his favorite type of sandwich?
Pastrami. With LOTS of mustard and LOTS of cheese. (Well, technically I said, "What? No cheese?" after he said pastrami with mustard on sour dough. And he said "Of course. Lots." So, I'm right. Right?)

8. What would he eat everyday if he could?
Peanut butter. (And he totally does.)
My wife's lasagna and my mom's enchiladas.
Yeah, I'd eat those every day, too.

9. What is his favorite cereal?
Frosted Flakes.
Granola or Frosted Flakes.
(By the way, I don't think we've ever bought Frosted Flakes. Ever. That might be a fun Christmas gift.)

10. What would he never wear?
Any sort of NY Yankees gear.
Parachute pants.
And now you know why we laugh a lot.
He then said, "To be serious, anything with a Yankees or Lakers or Raiders logo. Or anything with Obama on it."
Just highlighting that my right answer is first. :-)

11. What is his favorite sports team?
The Boston Red Sox. Or will he say the Broncos? Or the Celtics? Hmmmm. Red Sox.
His answer started with "Ooooohhhhh, that's hard, man." Then he said "I don't have one. It's the Duke Blue Devils, Red Sox, Broncos, Celtics, Air Force Falcons. I can't pick one. If you have to pick one, Red Sox."
Yesssssssssssss, I'm right again. I wish I got paid for this!

12. Who is his best friend?
Me!!!!!
(Yay, he agrees.)

13. What is something you do that he wishes you wouldn't do?
Leave my shoes around the house.
He said "Where do I start?" He SAYS he was kidding.
Ha. Ha. Very funny.
His real answer is that I never finish the entire cup of whatever drink I'm drinking.
Well, yeah. That.

14. How many states has he lived in?
2.

15. What is his heritage?
I believe his ancestors are from Mexico. BUT - I bet he'll say American.
If I have to check a box, it's American. If I have to choose an ethnicity, it's hispanic. He now wants to know if we're ever going to get to important things, like beer and foreign policy. Whoooo. That Cabana Boy is something, isn't he?

16. You bake him a cake for his birthday, what kind of cake?
If it's cake, I'll say German Chocolate. But he'd probably rather have pie -- either pecan or key lime.
He said carrot.
I said "Really?"
He said "Nooooooooooo!" He asked what I said
and I read him my answer.
He said "Yep."

17. Did he play sports in high school?
Yep, baseball, basketball (not his best) and soccer.
He is now all miffed that I tattled on him and would like you to know that while basketball was not his best, he was All-State in soccer and All-Conference in baseball.

18. What could he spend hours doing?
Playing soccer, watching nascar or any sport, really -- sleeping, and talking politics.
Flying my F-16 simulator, golfing (oooh - I forgot that one!) and building models.
I totally didn't see those answers coming.

I love you, Cabana Boy. *smooch*

Mini-Me Friday #2

2008-10-03T04:12:00.001-07:00

Well, this week I neither gained, nor lost. To me, that is a victory because mid-week, I was a cheese eatin' fool! Seriously - I went on, of all things, a cheese eating streak. It was strange. I also know that I didn't eat my snacks that day, so it was right before dinner and I just snarfed it down. I'm sure that's what did it, but I truly was relieved when I saw that I didn't gain anything back.

As far as exercise goes, I did better this week. I exercised 4/7 days, which felt great to get back into. I'm not having to totally kick myself to get it done and I totally thought I would be. I'd like to improve the pace that I'm able to walk at, but I know that will come with time.

In thinking about my week, I can tell you that I did LOTS better eating-wise on the days when I kept my little food journal thing WITH me and was able to write down exactly what and how much I had eaten right away. The days that I didn't have it or remember to do it at all until the next day pretty much got away from me. (Cheese night is a good example. If I would have known how well I'd stuck to my plan at that point -- I probably would have figured out how much I *should* have, cut it up and put the rest back. Instead, I just kept that big ol' brick of cheese right next to me while I made dinner and snacked away. Oh - and got some grapes while I was at it -- one of my fave combos to eat together, grapes and cheese.) Anyway - I have noticed that one, so a goal this week is to keep my CR (food journal) with me all the time.

One thing I've done that's been absolutely fantastic for me is the meal planning. Seriously - that has been amazing. It has saved me a bunch of time at night, a bunch of food has been saved from being wasted, and we've saved in our food budget BIG TIME.

I'm about halfway done with my meal planning for the rest of this month, so I'll put that on the sidebar again when I finish. It's actually been kind of fun...I always talk about trying new recipes or making ones we've enjoyed again but then I get into the middle of a hectic weeknight and just make the same ol' stuff because it's there. Now I can actually TRY those recipes and make those things again that I've only made once but that we really enjoyed.

Yesterday I picked out two cookbooks and two magazines that I knew had a bunch of recipes I'd been wanting to try. I needed 27 more meals for October, so I made a list of 6 chicken/turkey, 6 seafood, 5 pork, 5 beef, and 5 vegetarian dishes. What I now need to finish is actually putting them onto the calendar and making a shopping list for each week from the recipes, based on what we already have in the freezer/pantry and what I'll need to pick up for those meals. Then, I'll be all set. LOVE it. Absolutely love it. The other thing I still need to do and will probably just do in batches is figure out the food exchanges for each recipe. If I know how many are in each serving, it will really help me during the day and stick to my eating plan better.

So, there ya go. My weight loss week in a nutshell. Goals for this week: keep my CR with me and add in some different exercise, not just walking. Even if I don't get a DVD or something in there, I want to make sure I add some easy strength training and stretching in every evening.

My memory verse for this week was Proverbs 29:18 - "Where there is no revelation, the people cast off restraint."

Yes, and some do it with cheese!

Wordless Wednesday

2008-10-01T06:28:00.000-07:00

Here's the face that gets me all melty.

A Great Opportunity & My Favorite Cuties...

2008-09-28T06:36:00.000-07:00

Most of you that know me know that when my husband asked to support two U.S. soldiers for his Father's Day gift two years ago, it was a great decision for our whole family. It has really blessed us to be pen pals and provide care packages for our troops. You think you're going to help them and it ends up blessing you more than you can dream of.

Anyway - I just got an email saying that they are pretty desperate for support right now. If you have any interest in being a pen pal and/or care package provider for one of our guys or gals overseas, you should check it out. Just go look and see what you might possibly be moved to do. They also have some special programs and holiday support, so look at those, too. It's a wonderful organization -- I can't say enough good things about it.

http://www.adoptaplatoon.org/

**********************************************************

I just uploaded some new pictures from the camera and thought I'd share. It's amazing to me how quickly these kids grow. (And I have the receipt from a recent shoe shopping trip as proof!)

Miss G is so good at making messes. As you can see, she loves it. What you don't see in this picture is that she has the ENTIRE newspaper spread across the living room floor. She had just as much fun picking it up (I had her put it all in the empty laundry basket - it was just easier that way) as she did taking it apart. And it let me get dinner together, so I didn't mind too much.

In case you are wondering what Mason might look like when he's 5, here's a rough estimate:

Mason clearly enjoys being admired by his Big Sister. I think that she was singing "Twinkle, Twinkle" to him.

I love the little moments that make up our days together. Most of them, anyway...

Mini-Me Friday #1

2008-09-26T05:24:00.000-07:00

Yes, it's back. Well, I'm back. Hmmm - well, my efforts to slim down a bit and get healthy are back.

I gave myself the 6 weeks after the baby to let my body heal without getting too crazy, and lucky for me - the very next week my First Place group started up again! (It's basically like weight watchers, but is a christian group - so therefore, not much like weight watchers at all, I guess. Well, hopefully you get the point.)

So, last week was our first meeting. Let me tell you, for some reason - it's more motivating to me to eat well when I know that someone is going to be reading about everything I put into my mouth. Why it's not just as motivating to me that MY body is going to look/feel better instead of that someone else is holding me accountable, I will never know - but that's the way it is for me. At least at this point, anyway.

Week #1 - I've done pretty well. I set my goal at 20 pounds for the 13 weeks of this session. I figure that is attainable and not too crazy. Oh - and before any of you get all over me about not dieting and breastfeeding, I'd like you to know that not only did I add 400 extra calories onto my plan for breastfeeding, but that I sought and received my doctor's approval before I began, so there ya go. Besides, really all I've changed is the quality of what I'm eating -- not really even the quantity too much.

We had our meeting last night and I lost 2 pounds this week, so I feel like I'm off to a good start. Yesterday was the first day that I was able to work out. I'm okay with that because I did get a major handle on changing my eating habits this week, and I had a pretty stressful week with MUCH less kid-free or reduced-number-of-kids time than I anticipated having. It's hard to exercise with all 3 of them around. I think I'll put my exercise log in the sidebar again, that helped me stay on track last time.

Georgia got sick last week and then this week, we had a strange deal with hand, foot & mouth disease. You'd think that Miss G would get it, but it was actually Mitchell who showed up with it. Luckily, he only had sores in his mouth and not on his hands or feet, but they were pretty painful. They are almost gone, thank goodness. For 3 days he was talking like he had just been to the dentist for a filling and we had a pretty limited range of foods that he could eat without pain. We've been really, really trying to keep it away from Miss G and Mr. Magoo -- hopefully they will be able to escape it. So far, so good.

ANYWAY - having him home from school, keeping him away from the baby, keeping the other two from fighting, etc. - a good challenge for me in the ol' emotional eating department. Oh, and did I mention that Miss G is giving up her nap? Yeahhhhhh...sigh...sad, but true.

I started really paying attention to myself with regards to eating because I try to write down what I eat the minute I eat it, otherwise I'll forget. I noticed that whenever I would be talking on the phone to someone about what was up with us these days or right after the kids were stressing me out with fighting, I'd end up standing in front of an open refrigerator looking for something to munch on. The good thing is that I had really set myself up for success. I made a menu and planned our meals -- side dishes and everything -- for two weeks before I went to the grocery store so the only groceries I bought were things for our lunches and dinners and healthy snacks. Let's just say that I have eaten a lot of cucumbers and celery with roasted red pepper hummus this week...which feels like a good change from goldfish, chips/salsa, or some ice cream.
(By the way, two tablespoons of hummus is actually quite a bit!)

So, there you go. Emotional eating in the wake of the first week of mops (and all of that yummy food!), a 5 year old hand, foot and mouth victim, a semi-nappy two year old, a boob-loving newborn, a hubby with a stressful, very important week at work, a dinner date and concert, and a women's conference -- that was week #1. I feel BLESSED to have come out 2 pounds lighter at the end of all of that, now that I read it that way.

I think I'll end each mini-me update with the memory verse that I learned each week, since for me - the beauty of my First Place experience is that weight loss is pretty much a bonus. It's what it does for the WHOLE me, not just the chubby parts that I love. This first week I got to pick my own verse, and it sort of sets me in the right frame of mind. I am His, this body is His.

Romans 6:13 (NLT) "Do not let any part of your body become an instrument of evil to serve sin. Instead, give yourselves completely to God, for you were dead, but now you have new life. So use your whole body as an instrument to do what is right for the glory of God."

Have you ever...

2008-09-22T05:57:00.001-07:00

This looks fun, and who doesn't love an already done for you blog entry? Cheri had this on her blog, and I thought it would be fun to see what you all have done, too - so feel free to do it. Just copy and paste the 200 statements then bold the ones you have done...the idea is to highlight the things you have done out of the 200 items on the list.
If you see bold in this one, it's because I've done that. Okay, here we go...

1. Touched an iceberg
2. Slept under the stars
3. Been a part of a hockey fight
4. Changed a baby's diaper (about 2 minutes ago, actually)
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity
7. Swam with wild dolphins
8. Climbed a mountain (most of the way, anyway)
9. Held a tarantula (I passed on that one when given the chance. *shudder*)
10. Said "I love you" and meant it
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea
14. Stayed up all night long and watched the sun rise
15. Seen the Northern Lights
16. Gone to a huge sports game
17. Walked the stairs to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown and eaten your own vegetables
19. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope
20. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Bet on a winning horse
23. Taken a sick day when you're not ill
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Taken an ice cold bath
28. Had a meaningful conversation with a beggar
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Ridden a roller coaster
31. Hit a home run
32. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking
33. Adopted an accent for fun
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Felt very happy about your life, even for just a moment
36. Loved your job 90% of the time
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied (not smart enough to actyally FEEL that way ,ost of the time, sadly)
38. Watched wild whales
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Gone on a midnight walk on the beach
41. Gone sky diving
42. Visited Ireland
43. Ever bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited India
45. Bench-pressed your own weight
46. Milked a cow
47. Alphabetized your personal files
48. Ever worn a superhero costume
49. Sung karaoke
50. Lounged around in bed all day
51. Gone scuba diving
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Done something you should regret, but don't
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Been in a movie
60. Gone without food for 3 days
61. Made cookies from scratch
62. Won first prize in a costume contest
63. Got flowers for no reason
64. Been in a combat zone
65. Spoken more than one language fluently
66. Gotten into a fight while attempting to defend someone - verbal not physical
67. Bounced a check
68. Read - and understood - your credit report
69. Recently bought and played with a favorite childhood toy - PLAYDOUGH, YAY!!
70. Found out something significant that your ancestors did
71. Called or written your Congress person
72. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over
73. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge
74. Helped an animal give birth
75. Been fired or laid off from a job
76. Won money
77. Broken a bone
78. Ridden a motorcycle
79. Driven any land vehicle at a speed of greater than 100 mph
80. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon
81. Slept through an entire flight: takeoff, flight, and landing
82. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
83. Eaten sushi
84. Had your picture in the newspaper
85. Read The Bible cover to cover
86. Changed someone's mind about something you care deeply about
87. Gotten someone fired for their actions
88. Gone back to school
89. Changed your name
90. Caught a fly in the air with your bare hands
91. Eaten fried green tomatoes
92. Read The Iliad
93. Taught yourself an art from scratch
94. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
95. Apologized to someone years after inflicting the hurt
96. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language
97. Been elected to public office
98. Thought to yourself that you're living your dream
99. Had to put someone you love into hospice care
100. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn't know you
101. Had a booth at a street fair
102. Dyed your hair
103. Been a DJ
104. Rocked a baby to sleep
105. Ever dropped a cat from a high place to see if it really lands on all four
106. Raked your carpet
107. Brought out the best in people
108. Brought out the worst in people
109. Worn a mood ring
110. Ridden a horse
111. Carved an animal from a piece of wood or bar of soap
112. Cooked a dish where four people asked for the recipe.
113. Buried a child
114. Gone to a Broadway (or equivalent to your country) play
115. Been inside the pyramids
116. Shot a basketball into a basket
117. Danced at a disco
118. Played in a band
119. Shot a bird
120. Gone to an arboretum
121. Tutored someone
122. Ridden a train
123. Brought an old fad back into style
124. Eaten caviar
125. Let a salesman talk you into something you didn’t need
126. Ridden a giraffe or elephant
127. Published a book
128. Pieced a quilt
129. Lived in a historic place
130. Acted in a play or performed on a stage
131. Asked for a raise
132. Made a hole-in-one **just in mini-golf! :)
133. Gone deep sea fishing
134. Gone roller skating
135. Ran a marathon
136. Learned to surf
137. Invented something
138. Flown first class-
139. Spent the night in a 5-star luxury suite
140. Flown in a helicopter
141. Visited Africa
142. Sang a solo
143. Gone spelunking
144. Learned how to take a compliment
145. Written a love-story
146. Seen Michelangelo’s David
147. Had your portrait painted
148. Written a fan letter
149. Spent the night in something haunted
150. Owned a St. Bernard or Great Dane
151. Ran away
152. Learned to juggle
153. Been a boss
154. Sat on a jury
155. Lied about your weight
156. Gone on a diet
157. Found an arrowhead or a gold nugget
158. Written a poem
159. Carried your lunch in a lunch box
160. Gotten food poisoning
161. Gone on a service, humanitarian or religious mission
162. Hiked the Grand Canyon
163. Sat on a park bench and fed the ducks
164. Gone to the opera
165. Gotten a letter from someone famous
166. Worn knickers
167. Ridden in a limousine
168. Attended the Olympics
169. Can hula or waltz
170. Read a half dozen Nancy Drew or Hardy Boys books
171. Been stuck in an elevator
172. Had a revelatory dream
173. Thought you might crash in an airplane
174. Had a song dedicated to you on the radio or at a concert
175. Saved someone’s life
176. Eaten raw whale
177. Know how to tat, smock or do needlepoint
178. Laughed till your side hurt
179. Straddled the equator
180. Taken a photograph of something other than people that is worth framing
181. Gone to a Shakespeare Festival
182. Sent a message in a bottle
183. Spent the night in a hostel
184. Been a cashier
185. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
186. Joined a union
187. Donated blood or plasma
188. Built a camp fire
189. Kept a blog
190. Had hives
191. Worn custom made shoes or boots
192. Made a PowerPoint presentation
193. Taken a Hunter’s Safety Course
194. Served at a soup kitchen
195. Conquered the Rubik’s cube
196. Know CPR
197. Ridden in or owned a convertible
198. Found a long lost friend
199. Helped solve a crime
200. Responded to a NJP newsletter

What a weekend...

2008-09-21T06:11:00.000-07:00

This is a long one, so you might want to grab a snack and a beverage. Hmmm, well, considering the content, perhaps just a beverage. And a comfy chair.

Miss G hasn't had a great weekend so far. Thursday night, I started my First Place weight loss group meetings again (so watch out for Mini-Me Fridays to start over!) and Chris had the kiddos at home. I didn't realize until I got home that I had actually left my cell phone in the car. It had slid under one of Mason's blankets in the front seat. I walked in the door and his first question was "Where is your phone?"

Uh-oh. That's never a good welcome home question.

"Ummmmm, probably in the car, I'm guessing."
"Well, you should think about actually HAVING it with you more often."
"Yeah, I'll look into that."
"Where is the vinegar?"

Uh-oh. That's not good either. That means something needs to come out of the carpet with my super-duper, fantastic diaper-assisted removal technique.

"Why? What happened?"
"Just where is it?"
"Why???? What do you need it for?"
"She pooped on me, okay? She pooped on me AND the carpet, and I want to get it out! I put both of us in the shower with our clothes on, if that tells you anything."

Ohhhhkay then. Poop. The Cabana Boy has some major poop-related issues, so this was not a good night for dear ol' Daddy in the "quality time with the kids" department. (If you've seen the youtube collage of men changing babies' diapers, they are his kindred spirits. The 2nd man reminds me of him during our Norovirus night earlier this year, and the 3rd guy reminds me of when he changed Mitchell's diapers with a painter's mask on for the first few weeks of his career in Fatherhood. No kidding.) Did I also mention that we *just* had our carpets professionally cleaned last month? Yep, sure did. Oh, and I mean what I say at the top of my blog, by the way. You've been fairly warned. Poop seems to come up a lot around here.

Anyway, I helped Chris expertly extract the yuckiness from the carpet and then we got everyone into bed. It occured to me that in order for the poop scenario to play out the way it did, something was up with our baby girl's digestive world. It also came to mind that my first MOPS meeting of the year was in the morning (of course!) and she would probably not be a good candidate for the childcare situation. I am on the steering team (Alana, since you asked - I do publicity) and really needed to be there to help with the registration process and providing some of the food. Things got even worse when she woke up screaming her head off at about 2 a.m. She has issues with the lights being on - like the ACTUAL light in her room, not a night light. (That is a completely different post in itself that I'll bless you with on another day.) This is what she was screaming about, but while I had her in the bathroom going potty and all of that 2 am fun, I noted that her nose was running, she was all kinds of crazy stuffed up and had a cough.

Basically, she was a complete mess.

Luckily, my father-in-law wasn't working the next day and when I called him in the morning, he willingly agreed to put his own health at risk by watching this little germ factory for us. I went to pick her up after MOPS and he reported that she was as goofy as ever and that she didn't act like she felt bad at all. He also handed me a bag that held some rinsed out pants in it, meaning that the poop situation was not yet resolved. (It was also majorly putting a kink in our Operation Potty Training effort. *sigh*) As I put her into her carseat on their driveway, I asked if she had gotten stung or bit by something. He said he didn't think so, but I was looking at this.

As you can see, she isn't all that bothered by the ginormous welts taking up half of her sweet little face, but I sure was. I am allergic to bee stings and swell up in welts like that when I get bit by spiders, so I was thinking that was probably the case. She helped her Papa pick tomatoes in the garden, so it was a completely plausible theory at the time. I gave her some benadryl before I fed her lunch and thankfully, they disappeared after about 20 minutes. I put her down and she took a great nap. No pictures this time, but when I put her on the potty, I noticed that the rash had done a magical reappearing trick as it was now only on her left thigh.

Hmmmm. There goes the bite/sting theory.

Have you ever noticed that kids tend to get this sort of thing ONLY when there is something great going on that you have been looking forward to? My husband and I had a fun date night planned -- we had tickets to the Montgomery Gentry/Toby Keith concert. Of course.

I think we might have the best parents in the entire world because much like my hubby's father, my parents completely threw caution to the wind and gladly welcomed our little hive-sporting, snot blowing, poop shooting two year old into their home with open arms. (I should mention this would also be their first time babysitting all three of them at the same time!) I agonized about leaving her while she was sick, but again - she was running around like her normal little self, minus being a little sleepy from the Benadryl. We ended up going to the concert and having a wonderful time...I'm really glad everyone convinced me to still go. Miss G did fine - the poop situation improved and my parents said she did great.

We all spent the night at my parents' house since we got back so late and their house was so close to the concert location. When my mom and I got Georgia up in the morning and put her on the potty, the hives were back and in full force. This time they were on her right cheek, all over her stomach, and up and down both legs. It was just so bizarre! Thankfully, she wasn't itchy or in pain, but it was really starting to worry me.

Yeah, about that looking forward to stuff thing? My friend, Erin, got a free parking pass and tickets to sit in a suite at the Women of Faith conference and would be picking me up in about an hour and was taking Mason with me. Mitchell would be going to the CSU football game to watch our cousin play. I told Chris he just had to call the pediatrician and take her in now. It turns out that she has an ear infection. I guess the tube in her left ear isn't working like it should and that it is all tied to and possibly originated from her two year molars coming in.

Poor sweet girl. She never once said anything about her ears, and we asked! In fact, we just went to the pediatrician not too long ago to get her ears checked and they were fine. It was Mitchell who had the ear infection.

I always feel badly when it ends up being an ear infection, it makes me feel like we should have known and gotten her in sooner or something. The thing is, in this case, her ear infection was camouflaged. We saw hives, a runny nose, poop issues, no pain, and an overall happy little girl. Not what typically happens when she gets an ear infection.

I started thinking about how many times I do that in my own life. One issue gets covered up with something else. Something completely seeming unrelated gets piled on and before you know it, like my sweet Miss G, I am a complete mess.

The other day is a great example. We ran late for school. The carpool kiddo I pick up was runing even later. Mitchell left his lunchbox in the car and I had to take it back to school. A cup of milk got spilled on the floor I had just swept and mopped. I went to the pharmacy to pick up my prescription to find out they still hadn't gotten the refill authorization from my doctor that was requested a week before. The kids wouldn't nap at the same time. Mason was nursing while Mitchell needed help in the restroom. Miss G woke up from her nap early. I made tacos for dinner and as I went to put a filled up shell onto a plate, I fumbled it and everything dropped on the floor. That I had now already swept and mopped twice.

Ever had a day like that? How do you even begin to untangle that mess and figure out exactly where you started feeling annoyed. Or weary. Or frustrated. When do you physically break down and start crying? (For me, it was the taco that put me over the edge.) By the time my husband got home, I was not in a good way. I was covered in spit up, my hair was in a ponytail and pulled halfway out in little loops from Miss G's makeover attempts with her Dora brush, a trail of taco meat covered my shirt and pants, and my eyes were rimmed from crying. I think he deserves a shout out for not turning on his heel and running a four-hour errand or something.

The thing is, not once during the day did I stop to ask for help. I called my husband to vent and I got a latte, but neither of those made my insides feel any better. The one thing I didn't do is the one thing I should have done, starting with running late for school. I didn't pray. I didn't ask God to help me. To strengthen me. To give me an extra dose of patience. To give me an extra measure of laughter. To give me some p-e-a-c-e.

Seriously, Tara. What a bonehead move. I know that if I ask, He will give it to me. Now, for my friends who are not on the same page with me on this one, I'm not saying "give me a million dollars" and poof - it's there. I'm saying that when I pray for peace and comfort, I get it. Does it mean I'm not worried about things anymore? No. It means that the peace and comfort offsets the worries and anxieties of my life and things are more tolerable and less intense.

Please, learn from my mistake. When you have "that" day, don't wait until you end up being a complete mess before you take a breath and look to Him for some help. There's a good chance your day will turn around, and even if it doesn't, you won't be as weary and beaten down at the end of the day. Diagnose the problem early, and call The Doctor.

Six weeks later...

2008-09-10T22:46:00.000-07:00

And here I am. Still somewhat in awe of the fact that I have three children.

Let's put it this way - I can only offer to drive two children somewhere and I have a MINIVAN, people. There should be wayyyyyy more room in there! But, no -- we pretty much fill it up on our own. Very strange. (In a wonderful way.)

Anyway, I'm getting ready to go to bed soon but thought I'd do a mini update.

Mitchell just started (and is LOVING) kindergarten. He had to miss the 2nd day of school because of a cruddy cold, which we found out today ended up turning into an ear infection. Go figure -- healthy all summer and BAM. Instantaneous illness with school starting. Nice. Doesn't it always end up that way? He is all kinds of excited because his teacher is taking them on a REAL treasure hunt tomorrow. He keeps emphasizing the "real" part to me. They are all dressing in their pirate best and everything -- he could not be more excited. I'm wondering what the treasure will be. I'm hoping it's celery myself. I would love something like that to be the ending. Tee hee!

Georgia just started (and is also LOVING) preschool. I am told that "she is a pro" when it comes to school. Now, if we could just get her to be a pro on the whole potty training thing, I'd be good. My hair stylist recently informed me of some gray hair sightings...I blame the potty training. She is more into playing with her babies these days and has developed a serious need to sing every day. Not a preference. A need. The girl must jam or things go south. She is also all about anything princess or princess-related. I believe it is an illness, actually.

Mason is growing like a crazy man. He is a little chunk and those baby smiles and coos just melt me and then some. He is the sweetest baby boy! At my MOPS steering retreat this weekend, I believe the longest he was not held was for about 7 minutes. He was a spoiled boy and just ate those ladies up. He would just snuggle in and the next thing you know, all sorts of hormones and "I want another one" comments just started flyin' around the room! He is a joy.

So. There you go. Again, I'll leave you with some pictures. First day of school and Mason at 6 weeks. The picture of him is actually the result of Miss Sassy Pants refusing to stay in her bed tonight at bedtime. We had to remove her beloved Duck and Blankie from the room. Mason was guarding them with his life, as you can see.

I hope to get back in the bloggy saddle soon - both reading and posting. For now, I'm doing the best that I can. Love to all...

Settling in.

2008-08-25T01:53:00.000-07:00

Well, it's been three and a half weeks now since we added little Mason to our family and I can tell that we're all getting settled in.

Georgia, who initially didn't quite know what to make of him or the whole situation, is now fully into loving on the little guy. She calls him "my new beebee" most of the time and loves to kiss, hug and hold him. (The first week or two she was all about just checking him out occasionally, but wasn't real interested in touching him much.) She also must be listening quite closely to what I say because I noticed today that when he started fussing, she immediately said "Hold on, Mason beebee. Mommy be WIGHT there!" Poor little third baby -- even Georgia knows he has to hold on for a minute or two at least 80% of the time. She is working on the whole potty training deal, which given the family circumstances at the moment, is not going all that badly. She is also cutting her two year molars which stinks. (This is actually the reason I'm up at 3 am right now -- not Mason, actually. I think she is FINALLY going back to sleep, but I am not convinced enough to lay back down yet, so I decided to sneak in a little blog time.)

Mitchell is still all about being a great big brother. He absolutely LOVES to hold him, read to him, and try to make him smile. Might I also suggest, as an aside -- if you are having trouble with a hygiene routine with your little boy...you might consider adding a new baby to the family! He has never needed so few reminders to wash his hands...it's wonderful! Really though, he will put the boppy pillow on and hold his little brother for a long time. And I've noticed that Mason clues right in on Mitchell when he's around -- I'm guessing that his little shadow is already trying to figure out how to be just like his big brother!

Chris is back in the groove at work but I think it's still somewhat difficult to leave us. We all just got so comfortable with being together all of the time. His knee is healing really well and he's working hard on the rehab. His soccer team had their first game today so he went to watch them play. I think it darn near killed the man to have to just sit and watch...he is itchin' to get back in there! I have to give him a little shout out for a great idea that has worked really well for me. When he leaves each morning for work, he puts out what he calls "bird seed". He leaves a cup of juice in the fridge and a little bowl of dry cereal on the kitchen table for M and G and turns the tv to Noggin or PBS or something before he turns it off. Then, when the kids get up entirely too early for me, instead of coming to wake me up...they head downstairs where Mitchell gets the juice for them and all they have to do is turn the tv on. I always hear them get up, but it buys me an extra half hour or so of wake up time. It's marvelous, especially after nights like tonight! I'm hoping the whole DNC in Denver madness isn't too crazy for him this week - he works right downtown in the thick of it. He's so funny - he bought himself some extra stuff at Sam's Club today, "just in case" and is keeping it in his office. So if something goes down, know that my husband will be holed up in his office and able to sustain himself for quite a few weeks with granola and powdered lemonade.

As for me, I have to say that I'm actually doing fine. I just "got my hair did" as my best friend says...and instead of touching up my highlights like I planned to do, I actually took them out and went back to a full head of dark hair. It will lighten up, but it's pretty dark at the moment which still catches me by surprise when I see myself in the mirror, but I like it. My husband LOVES it which is nice -- I have been teasing him that he just likes having a new woman in the house. I feel really good physically and other than the usual being super tired by about 3pm each day, I'm managing with the lack of sleep okay. This week I need to get on the stick with trying to nail down a little more of a schedule with Mason. It's funny that I even say that because I'm a little anal about that sort of thing and I remember writing down the whole when they ate/slept/pooped deal with Mitchell and Georgia for weeks. I did it for about 3 days with Mason and that was because I knew I'd be too tired to tell the doctor about what was going on at his little checkup. Hopefully getting something a little more set this week will help us get off to a good start with school the following week. (Kindergarten, by the way. Kindergarten! How is this POSSIBLE??) I'm also getting back on my exercise horse this week. Starting out slow, but man -- I gotta do something. I am ready to pack 'em up and ship 'em out with regards to the maternity clothes, if you know what I mean. My run with "The Dinner Fairy" is coming to an end, and let me just say -- that right there is reason enough alone to join MOPS. What a gift to have your doorbell ring and see a smiling face holding a hot meal for your family, knowing that they really don't care if you have brushed your hair or cleaned your kitchen for days. Angels. All of them.

Mason, our sweet Mason -- has decided that he would like to grow as quickly as is humanly possible. We took him for his 2 week checkup (which was a little closer to three weeks, actually) and the child had already gained over 2 pounds from where he was when we left the hospital. Yes, that's right...2 pounds in less than 3 weeks. We could tell he'd put on some weight -- not only did he feel heavier, but he developed himself a nice double chin in a matter of days...I kid you not. He is a delight to have in our house and it's a rare thing when he full-on CRIES -- he usually just sort of fusses a bit here and there to test the waters. I've noticed that the fastest way to have him cry his little lungs out is to strap him in his car seat and go where he can't see you...this happens a lot as I usually have to make at least one or two trips to the car before I put him in there. Sippy cups, my purse, big kids, etc. By the time I get back in the house to get him, he's usually just howling. The second he hears and/or sees me, all is well. I'm still having issues with myself and putting the little man down. I just can't. I think he might eventually become stuck to my shoulder...we seem to have developed a little nook there, my baby boy and I. He loves snuggling in there and trust me, I don't fight it.

Well - I just went to check on Miss G and she's conked back out so I'm gonna climb back in bed for probably about an hour until he wants to eat again. I'll leave you with a picture of all three of our little buddies and a picture of Mason at 3 weeks.

Have a great week!

I went to the grocery store.

2008-08-13T15:16:00.001-07:00

Yes. With all three children! (And lived to tell about it, which I think is most noteworthy.)

Seriously, this outing was one of my biggest fears about having 3 kids...which sounds sort of silly...but truly -- I really was worried about it. So, yesterday when I discovered we were in dire need of a few things...I got brave.

It really wasn't bad. My hope was that one of those dumb car carts was available so that Big M and Miss G could drive themselves silly and Little M could ride in the seat part by me. Yeah. Two of them left -- neither of them had steering wheels. (WHY are they still out then??) So, they were walking.

I must admit, I am NOT above bribery in times like these. No siree, Bob. We headed straight to that cereal aisle and I told them they could each pick whatever box they wanted. You should have SEEN their eyes...they were huge and dancing with excitement! (I guess that's what happens when Mommy decides to let something else in the house besides oatmeal, honey nut cheerios and kix.) One box of Fruit Loops and one box of Cocoa Puffs later, we were making our way through the store...and I'm happy to report that it was a successful trip. They took turns grabbing things off of the shelves for me and putting them in the basket, and were equally helpful when I was putting the stuff up on the belt to get checked out! It was -- almost -- fun.

It's funny what becomes a big deal to you as a mom in times like these. I mean, really. It is somewhat sad to me that a simple trip to the grocery store was the highlight of my week. Well, it's a toss up between that and Georgia pooping on the potty for the first time, if that tells you anything.

I'm taking each moment as it comes and trying not to lose sight of the blessings I have under this roof. And the more that I think about it, I'm GLAD that the grocery store outing was such a big deal. It means that I'm right where I want to be doing what I know I was meant to do right now, and that's enough for me.

Week One Reflections...

2008-08-10T13:19:00.000-07:00

Well, I've officially survived my first week and a half as a Mommy to three children. That right there is a definite plus, don't you think?

My husband returns to work in the morning after three weeks at home with us. It has been just long enough to make it feel like a new way of life -- having him around and just having family time all the time. I am so very, very lucky that he was able to have that kind of time at home with us...I know that. But I won't lie. I'm already getting a little teary thinking about him walking out the door in the morning. We're all going to miss him so, so much. I think it might be a rough morning around here. I think I'll try and focus the kids' attention on doing something special for him though - maybe we'll make some special pictures or bake some treats. I just want to channel their feelings and energy into something that will make everyone feel better at the end of the day.

Anyway - I thought since true reality will hit me tomorrow, I would post a short update while I have the chance. Here are some of the happenings of our big first week together at home.

* My husband has taken a surprising (and completely unprompted) interest in styling Miss G's hair. I'm serious. He came to pick me up from the hospital and very proudly told me that he figured out how to put her hair in a ponytail for the first time. It was seriously cute. Since then, he's taken the initiative and done her hair most days and has even accepted some modeling and coaching from me. Who knew?

* Half of my family thought Mason's name was Nathan. I guess it sounds sort of similar on the phone or something. I believe everyone now knows that it's Mason, but still -- how funny would that be if we got a card or something for Baby Nathan? I giggle thinking about that.

* Georgia has definitely come around to the whole Big Sister and Baby Brother idea. She asks about him all of the time and frequently wants to hold and kiss Mason. The funniest thing to us is that she never seems to be able to see him when I'm nursing. I mean, my nursing boobs are big, but it's not like you can't see him there. She'll walk around all confused looking everywhere and look straight at me and say "Where's my Mason?" See. Now there's a girl for ya - looking anywhere BUT at the boobs. (If any of you watch that silly "Wipeout" show -- which is our new family favorite, by the way -- Chris had me laughing so hard one night. He said Georgia is like that crazy girl from Alaska who couldn't find the pole when it was sticking up right in front of her. It is JUST like that.)

* Mitchell is a great helper, just like we knew he would be. He is so smitten with his Baby Brother. Our favorite is when people come to see us or bring a meal over...he turns into sort of a mini Vanna White. He holds his hands up just like she does at the beginning of a new puzzle and says "And HERE is Mason. See? Here he is!" It's pretty cute. He also reads him books every day - and that gets me all misty. I mean, you just don't ever expect your "baby" to be big enough to read books (and I mean READ books) to a mini-him. Very strange. And special. And extraordinary. And bizarre. All at the same time.

* My husband looks pretty darn hot holding this little guy. What is it about the whole Daddy thing? He is a great Daddy and seeing him in action with all three of our special little kiddos just makes me weak in the knees.

* Can I tell you that I had forgotten just how much these little newborn people poop? Really. All. The. Time. Mitchell has gotten a complete kick out of the two times that I've gotten mega peed on. I thought he might have an accident himself the first time - he was laughing so hard. It got even more giggly when Mason started pooping on the changing table. I'm still trying to remember to cover that little fire hose with a washcloth every time I take his diaper off. I got out of the habit with Miss G.

* Mason is just about as sweet as he can be. I am finding it very difficult to put him down, not because he's fussy but because I know all too well how quickly it goes and how fast they grow. Right now, one of my very favorite things on the planet is true -- his little teeny bottom fits right in the palm of my hand when I hold him. *sigh* I just adore that. He is a complete snugglebug and I think that I might be setting myself up for trouble in the future, but I don't care. I am gonna hold and snuggle and love on that baby boy all I can.

So. There ya go. Just the tip of the iceberg but some of the latest happenings and learnings at our house. We are happy. We are in love. We are beyond blessed.

We have a baby!!

2008-08-05T14:00:00.000-07:00

And it's a.............

very long story.

The labor -- well, the labor is its own little ball of wax. Nothing major, just long. And by long I mean 3 days of very little sleep and lots of contractions. We did end up being induced the night before, which was not fun for me at all. I wouldn't change a thing though, as it's all gone the way that I know it was supposed to.

Actually, as I was laying in bed Wednesday night, fighting through some very painful contractions for the third exhausting night in a row, I started to get discouraged. I started to doubt myself. I started to question the way it all was going. I started to cry and swirl negative thoughts around myself.

Then I realized what I was doing and heard my husband's voice in my head...he had been saying all along that we were going to be positive. We were going to say positive things. We were going to have the positive experience that we wanted. (When we were walking the halls of the hospital at 3 am Wednesday morning before they sent us home...I told you the labor was its own story...I told him that I was positive I wanted to go home and sleep.) He was asleep on the little pull out sofa bed in my room and had no idea that my sleeping pill had worn off when I started diving into my little negative pool. But I looked over at him and just knew he wouldn't stand for it -- if I woke him up to tell him what I was battling through -- and he would be right.

So. I made a decision to just knock it off and I went back to my word for the year. Trust. I made that the focus of my prayers that night. Trust in myself and my body. Trust in my husband. Trust in the doctors and nurses caring for myself and my baby. Trust in our family to care for Mitchell and Georgia. Most of all, trust in The Lord and His plans for all of the above.

My decision to meditate on and pray for the trust I so desperately needed to give myself over to resulted in a huge surge of the strength, hope and encouragement that I so very much needed at that time. It's the best thing I could have done for myself, and you know what? Things started to turn around shortly after I made that decision.

As long and drawn out and painful as my labor was, my delivery was equally as quick, painless and wonderful. I can honestly say that this was the best delivery of the three and that I would do it all again in a heartbeat without a second thought! One of my favorite things is that while we waited for the doctor to arrive (yes, I had to sit and breathe through some contractions and fight the urge to push!) I decided that I wanted Chris to tell me who this baby was. So, when the doctor finally arrived, I told him that I wanted it to be my husband who announced the news about it being a girl or a boy. That was a great decision -- it was so wonderful to hear the joy and see the delight in my husband's face as he pumped his fist and yelled

"Yes!! It's a boy!!"

I remember just crying and laughing, all at the same time and being about as full of happiness and gratitude as one person could be for the healthy new life that we were welcoming into this world and into our family.

Mason Lawrence arrived at 12:33 pm on Thursday, July 31st. He was 7 lbs, 12 oz and a lengthy 21 1/2 inches long. He has a head of black hair and is as sweet as can be. My mom made the comment this morning that we'll need to label all of the newborn pictures or we'll get his and Mitchell's mixed up -- he is the spitting image of his big brother. Well, except that Mitchell was totally bald. But put a hat on them, and it is a pretty striking resemblance.

We are beyond thankful that he is a healthy little man. Believe me, I don't take it for granted that we were able to stroll out the doors of that hospital with our baby boy just days after his birth. As we waited for the elevator to come, I said a special prayer for all of the mommies and daddies in this world who don't get to do the same thing, and an extra special prayer went out for those people in my life who have had very different endings to their own birth stories.

As I rode in the car after leaving the hospital, hand-in-hand with my very best friend in the world, we remarked how different our journey home has been with all three kids. The first time, I honestly couldn't believe they were letting us go home and wondered how they could be so certain that we could keep him safe and healthy without help. The second time, we were bathed in pink, marveling at how much things had already changed and how we just couldn't believe we had TWO children. This time, we left feeling happy and relaxed, grateful and proud. It was like the thing we never knew was missing was in place, and we were the last ones to know how good it would feel.

Well, Mason is beside me and starting to squirm around, which means he'll be ready to eat (again) in a minute. I'll leave with some pictures of our magical little guy and the very proud family into which he was born.

Hi. No, I haven't had the baby yet.

2008-07-23T06:22:00.001-07:00

This is how I've started all of my phone calls this week. Especially if I'm talking to our parents. It first hit me when Chris was calling them yesterday morning to see if they wanted to go to the baseball game with him today. He *rarely* is the one on the phone, so I think seeing our number on caller ID and hearing his voice probably put them into a tizzy. I was sitting next to him as he talked to my mom and I heard this.

"Hi, it's Chris." "Oh, we're fine." "What? Oh, no. Nooooo...not yet. Sorry."

So, ever since then my new strategy is "Hi, it's Tara and I haven't had the baby yet" when I'm making phone calls. It seems to be working pretty well so far.

Not much of an update to give today, really. Just figured people would be looking for one about now. My due date is Friday -- I always had Sunday down, but I guess it's Friday, the 25th. As in 2 days. I have a dr. appt Friday morning and then if there's no baby, my induction will happen next Friday, August 1st. If you're wondering about my history -- I went into labor on my due date with Mitchell and with Miss G at 40 weeks, 6 days...the day before my induction was scheduled. So...not sure what to tell ya other than to buckle up for another week. (That's what I'm telling myself anyway.)

Good news though -- Chris is now walking "with two legs", as Mitchell puts it. Crutch free! Hooray! We successfully moved Georgia into Mitchell's room and they have had a relatively event-free first week of sleeping in the same room. I just this morning finished moving her clothes out of the nursery and into their bedroom and got the bin of baby stuff unpacked.

So. Now I'm ready.

That's the bad news. I'm running out of "busy work" like this to distract myself with. It's also been in the 90's almost all month, which you know - is just really fun for me and my water ballon/sausage toed feet. I do anything and they plump right up, so I'm doing house stuff in spurts. OH WELL. I really, truly am trying to enjoy it. I promise!!

We are enjoying having Chris home with us. The kids have gotten lots of Daddy time, and I've gotten lots of Mommy laying down with her feet up time, so it hasn't been too bad so far. I hope that you're all enjoying a fun, safe summer with your own families! I think my next post will be *the one* so until then...blessings to you all! I'll leave you with a picture of my two little buddies and another one of the most patient-but-absolutely-dying-to-meet-his-little-brother-or-sister Big Brother I've ever known with the belly. Ya know - sort of a Wordless Wednesday with a twist.

Still going...

2008-07-09T07:36:00.000-07:00

Just a quick fly-by to let you know that yep...still pregnant. Feeling pretty good actually, all except for the feet. Pretty sad when only 3 pairs of flip-flops fit. (The tops of my feet and my toes are so swollen I can't wedge them into anything else. Sort of like those chubby little baby feet, only significantly less cute.)

I have another doctor appointment tomorrow, so hopefully nothing will be going on again. Chris is almost off of his crutches (Friday), so next week would be okay. The following week would be great! As always though, the only one who knows what's up isn't sharing the big plan.

In the meantime, we're hanging out and enjoying our time together. I think I've finally checked everything off of my baby "to do" list and feel ready to go in that regard. I believe the most impatient person in our family may very well be Mitchell. He simply cannot WAIT to meet his little brother or sister! It's so cute how excited he is.

I will leave you with some pictures from the 4th of July - and a belly picture, since I know you will ask for one, Jennifer P! We enjoyed a quiet time at home with my parents and hope that you all enjoyed your holiday as well. It certainly is a privilege to be able to celebrate the amazing blessing of being an American!

Never a dull...well...you know!

2008-06-21T12:41:00.000-07:00

So. First things first, yes - still pregnant. I'm due now just under 5 weeks from now, and probably unlike 99% of pregnant women who are due in the middle of the blazing, hot summer -- I'm hoping that I don't go any sooner than that.

Why?

Well. For starters, my husband had knee surgery yesterday. He has this degenerative condition in his joints and basically is working with a bad batch of cartilage in both knees. The surgeon wasn't sure what he would find when he got in there. See - he just had a scope done, no massive cutting or anything. BUT - if the doctor would have gotten in there and found little to no cartilage left, then he wouldn't have been able to pin anything. He would have just cleaned stuff out and called it a day.

What he did find was quite a bit of cartilage that wasn't even completely detached and so the result is hopefully a good one for the ol' hubster. The surgeon thinks that he'll heal quite nicely and have a much reduced level of everyday pain as a result. That's the good news.

The bad news? He is to be completely non-weight-bearing on crutches for 4 weeks. Originally we were told 3 weeks, but now it is 4.

Oh, and no driving. For. Four. Weeks.

PANIC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That's me. Trying to get him to/from work is one thing. NOW, add the anxiety of being apart from him, with no car and the thought of me going into labor. Yeah. Like I said, panic.

It will be fine. It will work out. We are VERY blessed to have many friends and both of our parents in town, all of whom would GLADLY drop anything and everything to rush to our aid when and if we need it. I know this. I just -- well, I'm hormonal and emotional and it makes me about break into hives when I think about it. I'm a planner and this has thrown me for quite the loop.

This is all quite funny if you think back to what I chose as my word of the year.

TRUST.

Think I'm being challenged/encouraged to actually KEEP that word as my motto for the year? I mean, really. Our house didn't sell after 10 months on the market. We are having a baby we didn't exactly "plan" to have. And now I'm not sure that my husband will be able to walk, drive, etc. when this baby arrives.

Yes, I believe I really am down to one option. Trust.

Oh - and just FYI, I'm WELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL aware that I have it exceptionally good. After breaking into emotional tears this morning with my husband, he was quick to point out that if I really wanted to be overwhelmed, I could picture myself in this same situation living in Iowa. Or with him stationed in Iraq. Or worse.

And he's right. That's actually what brought the whole "trust" thing back to the surface for me. This is all working out the way it's supposed to. I know that. Unfortunately for me, it might not have the word "perfection" written all over it the way I expected it to - but I know that it will be okay.

*IF* I trust.

By the way, we do have history on our side. I didn't go into labor until my due date with Mitchell, and Georgia was 6 days late. So, there ya go. (Yes, I'm aware - it doesn't mean this one can't come early, I'm just saying that is not my pattern up to this point.)

So. Here I sit. With a gimpy hubby, two summer-crazed kiddos, a huge belly and a house that is no longer on the market. What does it all add up to?

A life I wouldn't trade for anything, a whole heap of hope and a renewed trust in Him that everything is going to be just fine.

Melts me like butter...

2008-06-06T08:40:00.000-07:00

I'm A Flip Flopper!

2008-06-03T06:38:00.001-07:00

Yes, that's right. Right in the middle of campaign season and everything.

You see, my friend Alana hosted a flip flop swap on her blog, and being the flip flop lover that I am, of course I played along. It's been so fun seeing what everyone got - they are all so stinkin' cute!

MINE are no exception! Thanks to Reese for sending these great flip flops to me! There were also some English tea biscuits and some raspberry vanilla tea! Yum! As you can see, the kids were eager to taste-test the cookies for me the minute I unpacked the box. (Oh, and dream on if you think my ever-growing cankles and sausage toes are going on the web. Not so much.)

I wear a LOT of black, so they will get some major mileage. (And I'm thinking that if Alana says giraffe is in, so is zebra print, right?) Thanks, Reese! I love them!!

I do have two sort of sad things to report though:

1. During my first outing in them, I stepped in someone else's gum. It all came off with some ice and scraping, but still. It was quite sad. And yet, so very me.

2. There was also a lovely card that Reese sent along with the shoes and treats, but my little card-stealing-Miss-G decided to play "mail" with it and it ended up getting ripped, bent, and generally over-loved so I decided not to post a picture of the "after" side of the card. Just know it was a very sweet addition that got some extra TLC from some little hands.

Head on over to Alana's blog to check out the rest of the flip flop swap goodies. It's fun to see them all...many of them I'd love to add to my collection! What a fun way to start out the summer!

The Great Poop Caper...

2008-05-28T09:34:00.000-07:00

That's what my hubby decided to name our quick trip to Albuquerque this weekend. I'll spare you the details, just know that it began LITERALLY about 5 minutes after we pulled into town and I thought it was over, but Miss G is determined to not let it end. The good news is that no one is "sick" per se...just ya know...not right. I have spoken to one friend who has a daughter in my son's class at school and they had the same stuff going on this weekend, so I'm guessing it is a little end-of-year gift from the school.

Sub!!!
Sub???
Anyone?!

No?

Okay, then. Off to the laundry I go.

The opposite of music to my ears...

2008-05-21T14:41:00.000-07:00

Misery loves company, which is why I have thoroughly enjoyed reading Janelle's blog lately.

Wait. That sounds wrong.

I'm not enjoying the fact that people are being rude to her in the last stretch of her pregnancy, it's just that I'm happy to have someone else in the club. Lately, I have also had at least one person every single day make some sort of bonehead or insensitive comment.

Yesterday, it was boys on the brink of puberty that got to me.

We had to get the oil changed in the van since we're taking a little road trip this weekend. There is a little park that the kids like not that far from the Grease Monkey, so I decided that was how we'd spend the 45 minutes. I had both kids loaded up in the stroller and was hoofin' it as quickly as I could. It was at least 80 degrees and let's face it, pushing two kids in the stroller on a hot day is not the same experience that it was a few months ago.

Anyway - the path to the park runs behind an elementary school. The kids just happened to be at recess on the playground that backs up to the path. (I'm sure you can see where this is going.) All is well, we're talking about all of the geese, ducks, and bugs that we are seeing as we walk when I start hearing older boys' voices (the school goes up to 8th grade) calling me from the playground:

Hey, you!
Lady - look over here!
Hey, you in the blue stripes! (In hindsight, they were horizontal stripes. Probably not a good move.)

Now see, I just wasn't in the mood. I guess maybe I should have played along and given the kids the benefit of the doubt to see what they wanted, but I had seen them on the play structure as we approached, and they were being pretty rowdy. I just didn't get a good feeling about what they wanted to show me. (I sensed a bare butt or two, if I'm honest here.) So, I just decided to ignore them and keep walking.

Well.

They didn't seem to care for my choice. Pretty soon the same voices were following me with:

Hey, fat lady pushing the stroller!

Hey, you - with the big, fat stomach!

Hey, fatty. Where ya goin'?

You'll be happy to know that I didn't even turn around...even though I was tempted to do many things, none of which would have been appropriate for my kids to hear or see me do.

I just kept on walking, and thankfully (or should I say mercifully?) Mitchell didn't seem to hear them either.

But UGH!!! I think I might have preferred to get mooned.

A Little Dose of Miss G.

2008-05-13T04:30:00.000-07:00

Ohhhhhh, my sweet girl. She is a nut.

And I mean that.

Doing what she does best...making a mess. (And loving it.)

Wishing with every bit of her being that she could get on stage in her "princess dress" with Mitchell and the rest of the kids during his program at school.

Here's a glimpse of her eye after her little incident in the bathroom on Saturday.

And, in case you have ever wanted to spend a few minutes with The Hurricane, here you go. They are short little snippets, but give you just a little taste of what things are like when she's in the room. Enjoy!

I know. After seeing those it's hard to believe that a graceful little bird like our own Miss G could ever manage to get a black eye, isn't it?

A Day For Moms...

2008-05-10T21:21:00.000-07:00

Happy Mother's Day, friends. Whether you are a mom, a grandma, an aunt, an "auntie"...I hope that this day finds special joy for you as you reflect on the little ones that you hold dear in your life.

I'd also like to throw out a special big hug to those of you who are grieving this Mother's Day -- the loss of your mom, grandma, special friend(s), relatives...and to those of you who have lost precious babies of your own (no matter how big those babies may have grown to be)...and to those of you who mourn children you long to have or never got to hold in your arms. Mother's Day is for you, too - and I hope that through the pain you can hold onto some happy memories...and if there is only pain, or it's more bitter than sweet, my prayer is that you are granted an extra dose of grace, comfort and peace today. Know that I am praying for YOU today, though I may not know your name. Some of you know I am praying for you by name, and I hope you feel my hugs.

It seems like I get a little more sentimental and a little more weepy with each Mother's Day that I am actually celebrated for being a Mommy. I care less about the gifts and more about the true gifts that I am given each day in my children. Really...if I never got another card, another rose, another crayon or marker filled picture, it would be okay. For me, Mother's Day has become less about me each year, and more about them in that I use that day to really, truly reflect on how immeasurably blessed I am to be able to hold these little lives and hearts in my hands every day.

I'm also more appreciative of the gifts I've been given in the form of my mom, my grandmothers, aunts, "second moms", my husband's family, and my friends. Being a mom myself makes me really take a breath when I stop to think how fortunate I have always been to have been surrounded by such special and amazing women.

Every year there is more to think about, more to celebrate, more to appreciate, more to smile about. Each year I've watched more people that I love and care about suffer through hardships and losses in their lives, and it makes me ever more grateful for what I have in my own life. So many days I take for granted things that I should not. So many days I do NOT count my blessings, nor do I give appropriate thanks for them. Mother's Day is sort of my "reality check" for myself in a lot of ways.

(By the way, my husband is currently downstairs baking some brownies for tomorrow and the intoxicating smell is very distracting! Stuff like that is definitely a bonus, too!)

We had a little scare today with Miss G as we were getting everyone ready to go to a family dinner party at my parents' house. She slipped on a wet spot in the bathroom and fell right into the tiled corner of our bathtub. I was putting the hair dryer away and when I heard a thud I looked over to see her in a pile holding her hand over her eye, and after a very long pause, her blood-curdling pain-filled scream filled my heart with fear. She looked up and I immediately saw a trail of blood coming out from just underneath her right eyebrow. (You know how anything on the face and near the eyes bleeds like crazy.) My husband (who was combing his hair) scooped her up and was trying to get a look at her eye.

I'm sure many of you can relate when I say that my husband is very good at comforting our kids and is completely competent in that department. BUT. When she was in that state and I wasn't physically holding her -- oh. my. word. It was like he was literally holding my own heart in his hands and as I watched a small goose egg instantaneously form above her little eye, I just kept saying "Give her to me. Give her to me. Give her to me." All the while, she is holding her arms out to me saying "Mommy......Mommy....."

*ache* It truly makes my heart ache remembering that moment.

It was probably only about 15 seconds from start to finish, but I just would not have been okay until I was holding her in my arms and physically pouring my love and comfort onto her. Chris (thankfully) didn't fight that and just handed her over. He knew better than to be offended or to take anything personally. He just sort of stood back and let us do our thing. She just melted into me, and really - I did the same to her.

We clung to each other, both crying, for a few moments until my overwhelming emotional tidal wave subsided and some reason set in. I gave her about three kisses and handed her back over to Daddy so that I could run downstairs and grab some ice for her eye. I prayed with each and every step for my sweet girl and tried to keep my heart from beating out of my chest. When I got back upstairs, Georgia and I reached out for each other again and I just headed straight for her rocking chair. She was NOT happy about the idea of ice coming near her eye, so I settled for just having her be still and sang to her as we rocked.

Thankfully, it quit bleeding very quickly as the corner of the tub made more of a puncture-like cut in her skin as opposed to splitting it open. Our focus of concern then changed from the bleeding to swelling, but that also slowed down rather quickly. In other words, we are so very, very fortunate. It's one of those "a millimeter this way or a centimeter that way and things would have been different" sort of injuries. We are SO lucky that she will likely end up with a small scab (hopefully not scar) and a black eye and nothing more.

I was a mess the rest of the day. Truly. It just shook me up. I know I'll get a jolt when I see her for the first time in the morning, too. *shudder* Thank you, Lord - for covering our sweet girl today. Talk about an easy transition into the Mother's Day perspective that I described earlier. Yikes.

I will leave you with a glimpse of my first taste of motherhood with each of my sweet, precious treasures. I am beyond blessed and eternally grateful for being able to say that. Happy Mother's Day.

Mitchell - about 5 minutes old. Can you tell we had a rough start to our journey?

Georgia - one day old and I was already smitten.

Baby Loo - 28 weeks and still cookin'... For those of you who I *know* will be giggling about it, please just this once, ignore the faucet. I was REALLY tired when I took this and forgot that it ends up there. *sigh* So silly.

One Eyed Wonder...

2008-05-08T20:46:00.000-07:00

That's me! I am somewhat of a cyclops this week. You see, sometime while I was sleeping Monday night, I developed pink eye. I got up to go to the bathroom and noticed that my eye was sort of itchy. And watery. And sort of gooey.

Fun, right?

So, in the morning when I got up, I noticed that it was worse, and also very pinkish/red. *sigh* Who doesn't love a good dose of pink eye in the morning? Yeah. So. As the day went on, my eye continued to get worse and worse. I *had* to go to the store with the kids, as we were literally on our last diaper/pull up for Miss G. The cashier literally gasped when I pulled up my sunglasses to see the pinpad to pay. I was like "I know. It's bad. I brought my own pen, don't worry."

I started to get somewhat worried while Georgia was napping in the afternoon as this was quickly turning into something other than your typical run-of-the-mill pink eye. My doctor, my eye doctor and my husband's doctor all had policies that prohibited them from calling in a prescription for medicated eye drops without seeing me first. At this point, I was unable to get an appointment with my doctor until Wednesday morning and I had a feeling that waiting that long would not be a good move. I was reading up on conjunctivitis in my kids' pediatrician's book and started to become concerned that I was having what could be symptoms of cellulitis. My dad said he could come stay with the kids while I went to the urgent care clinic before Mitchell's soccer game.

You know it's probably not good when the DOCTOR gasps upon seeing your eye for the first time.

Apparently, my "allergy" week was more like a sinus infection week. I had green yucky goo in my right sinus cavity and fluid behind my right eardrum. This explains how the pink eye came to be, as they all drain or not drain in the same spot, but she was stumped as to why it was so violently attacking my eye. She said there was a lot of bleeding in there...most likely due to the fact that my eye had so much pressure from the swelling. She put me on an oral antibiotic as well as antibiotic eye drops and told me that if it wasn't improving by the next day, I'd need to go to the ER.

FOR PINK EYE. Seriously??? Only me, I swear.

So. That night was horrible. I couldn't sleep at all. It felt like it wasn't improving at all. The only good thing about no sleep was that I could put my drops in every 2 hours all night long. Thankfully, when I woke up in the morning the swelling and redness in the skin surrounding my eye was better.

So, 3 days later here we are. The discoloration and swelling in the skin around my eye is lots better and I'm not having too many goobers anymore. That said, I 'm still very uncomfortable and still very cyclops/bloody eye looking. Seriously. I went shopping today for a few things and it was the topic of conversation each time I pulled my sunglasses down. Fun, fun. Chris would love it if I wore a t-shirt proclaiming that it's pink eye, not a black eye, by the way.

One funny thing did come of this whole thing last night. I had started to doze off on the couch while we were watching tv last night and my hubby said my name and tossed me something. When I first opened my eye, I couldn't see too clearly. I could swear to you that this man threw me a blackberry. All I know is that it was black and white and rectangular. And cold. I was squinting and trying to figure it out while I sat up and Chris starts laughing at me. He says "It's an ice cream sandwich, you dork." I started laughing, too...I told him I thought he got me a new phone. Maybe you had to be there, but it was pretty amusing. We decided the only way it would have been funnier is if I had put it up to my ear and said "Hello?"

I have never washed my hands so much in all my life. They are just raw, despite using more lotion on them than I have in all my life. So far, so good in the way of no one else getting it. (Any prayers to keep it that way would be much appreciated, by the way.)

Okay - if you are squeamish -- avert your eyes. I know that some of you are dying to see what it looks like, so here ya go. The first picture is about 1 am Tuesday and the 2nd picture is from last night before bed. Gross. Totally gross, I know. Okay - off to do eyedrops before bed!

Randomness...

2008-05-04T02:38:00.000-07:00

Wayyyy back in 2005 (3 years, really??) when I started this blog, I noticed that I often was blogging in the middle of the night. Guess what? That pattern stuck.

Maybe it's because I'm pregnant half the time. Ya think?

Anyway - here I sit at 3:44 am. Heartburn is winning, though I'm on round two of my Tums. And what is up with nature deciding to "move" in the middle of the night lately? Very inconvenient for me. I can handle the handful of sleepy potty breaks, but the other urge just makes it all but impossible to go back to sleep.

Annnnd, I'm sure you all wanted to know that, right? Riiiiiiggggghhhhht.

Speaking of being up in the middle of the night, I became a victim of an infomercial a few weeks ago. One of those steam cleaners -- not for the carpet, but the hand held kind. Complete with floor attachment. I believe I was still in the aftermath of the whole norovirus drama and they had me at sterilizing. Yep, there I was. Watching all of this steam power away germs and dirt and generally gross grime. And then there I was, on the phone buying that thing. It hasn't arrived yet, so I'll let ya know how big of a turkey I am. Who knows? Maybe it will end up being a beloved cleaning tool. I think I'll probably name it...it seems like the kind of thing that needs a name. (Yes, I'm a dork who often names inanimate objects.)

Moving along in the randomness...this next part could probably appear braggy, but I assure you it is simply an amazed Mommy report. You see, it appears that Mitchell has fully figured out this whole reading thing. In the last few months he has really, REALLY improved in the number of words he's able to figure out but I think it's kind of like when kids grow out of shoes. You know they're getting tighter, but then one day the shoes just don't fit anymore and you're left wondering EXACTLY when that happened? (Maybe it's just me.) I mean, I have seen him getting better, but the other night I was absolutely blown away. Last week, my parents took us, my sister-in-law and my two nephews to see this local production of the very Frog & Toad book that we own. (It was actually mine from when I was little.) Well, as you can imagine, he was very excited to come home and read it at bedtime. As usual, I started reading to him after tucking him in and I only got about 3 words out when he said "Mommy, I want to read it to you tonight."

And he so TOTALLY did!

I think in the entire chapter he missed about 10-15 words, max! It was absolutely amazing!! I was tempted to go to the basement and get my Running Record forms from my school stuff to check his accuracy, because I'm nerdy like that. Instead, I turned off the teacher side of my brain and let the Mommy side of my brain just go to goo. I helped him when he asked me to, but mostly I just sat and listened. And smiled like a complete goofball who had taken about 4 too many valium or something. I just couldn't help it.

I think that what happened is that I saw myself in him. He was just LOST in this book. I, for the first time, really saw him figure out how magical reading can be. I sat there snuggled up with a five year old male version of myself -- that child whose real world melted into the scenes found in the pages of the book. I can tell that he is going to be just like me. Called 14 times for dinner, only to be physically hunted down and found to have his nose in a book, oblivious to the fact that there is still life outside of those pages. That makes me grin ear-to-ear because I know that I witnessed him experiencing one of the great joys in my own life: reading.

He was so proud of himself, almost as proud as I was! We talked for awhile about our favorite parts of the play, how it made the book even funnier now, and again about how wonderful he did when he was reading to me. Of course, he begged me to do another chapter right then. I encouraged him to read another one on his own, but that it was bedtime. (He most often falls asleep with books on his bed.) When I left him, he was snuggled under his covers, holding his book in the air, saying the words "Chapter 2." I came back to check on him about 15 minutes later, and he was sound asleep, Frog & Toad still clutched in his little hands.

I remember the day I figured out how to read. I was sitting on the steps in my house with my mom. She was tying my shoes and I was reading to her from my Winnie The Pooh And The Blustery Day book. She stopped tying my shoes and said "You just READ that to me! You know how to read!" I think I was about 4 or 5 years old and to this day, I can still remember what a special feeling that was. I knew I'd just unlocked a whole new world and I could tell by how excited my mom was that it as a big deal. I hope that Mitchell remembers his Frog & Toad moment the same way...that he knows it is a special thing.

Okay - enough babbling for one middle of the night session. I think the Tums are starting to win. Maybe I'll try going to bed again. I took some time to say hello to all of you bloggy friends tonight. It was so fun to catch up!! Hopefully I won't be such a stranger anymore.

Night, night!

Motherhood in a nutshell

2008-05-01T19:08:00.001-07:00

This is my entry picture for this contest.

I was tempted to use a sweet, awwwww-inducing moment, but in the end - I really do feel like this one sums it up for me. I guess the general idea is to hang on tight and try to enjoy every moment. (Even the sleepless, poopy, and tear-filled ones.) Even though it may not look like the textbook definition of it in this picture, I know without a doubt that I'm holding two priceless treasures in my arms. My smile gets bigger every time I look back at this moment.

Yep, that's motherhood.

A good day!

2008-05-01T12:28:00.000-07:00

Wow. 2 blog posts, back to back. Try not to fall out of your chairs!

I am having such a good day. It started this morning when Mitchell crawled into bed with Chris and I before we were ready to get up. He asked if I was still sleepy and I said yes so he said "Well, then I'll just rub your back, Mommy."

And he did, too! Little sweetie.

Then, he decided he would pick out clothes for himself and for Georgia. They are all matchy matchy today with jeans, the same long sleeved shirt and a short sleeved shirt over the top. So cute!

Two of my three clients cancelled for today, but my in-laws still wanted to keep the kids the whole day so that means I get time *gasp!* to myself!! Amazing. On top of THAT, my dad called and asked if I had time for lunch today, so for the first time in years...I got to have a little date with just my Daddy. It was so fun!

I stopped on the way home to get a Chipotle gift card for my brother's birthday and well, Starbucks is next door, so you know I was all over that. (It's snowing today - definitely a coffee day since I skipped having any this morning!) Last year sometime, Sarah posted about one of her favorite drinks there and while I've tried it iced, I've never had the hot version.

'Til today! And girlfriends, it is gooooooooood.

Oh, and because it's soooooo not the way I ordered it, but it's the way the cashier told the barista to make it, I will share with you the official way to order it: grande, decaf, 1 pump cinnamon dolce white mocha with no whip. It really does taste just like a snickerdoodle! Mmmmmmm!!! Such a great little treat for me today.

Now, I'm off to fold laundry and run the vaccuum. Later, I think I'll lay on the couch and watch tv until it's time to get the kids. I still have 2 and a half more hours of me time! So cool.

Thank you, Lord for giving me days like today and for people who love me so much to make days like this possible.

Is that a cobweb?

2008-04-29T15:44:00.000-07:00

Well, if the 'net had cobwebs, this blog would surely be sporting a few! I've not exactly been regularly updating things, now have I?

Let me catch you up quickly, as I hear stirrings signaling the end of naptime in the next room...

*The baby-to-be: all is well in tummy land! I'm feeling good, just getting big and finding it hard to maintain my stamina towards the end of the day. I have been super duper nesty though, so our house is nice and clean and organized, so that's a good thing. These hormones though -- goodness. They are nasty little things from time to time, but I'm trying to round them up and keep them quiet for the most part. It's hard to believe we only have 3 months left to go! Time is a flyin', I tell ya.

*The house: is still for sale. We had our first showing in nearly two months this weekend and the realtor's office just called this afternoon to pass along the feedback that she received from the other agent. Apparently our house is "in their top 3" and showed "wonderfully" -- BUT -- they wrote an offer on another house in the neighborhood. Same size, pretty good condition, and yes - you guessed it! A foreclosure. They wrote their offer for 29K less than our asking price and in the realtor's words "they lowballed it" and there is quite a bit of interest on that house so there is a good chance their offer will be rejected. In that case, I'm guessing they could come back for another showing or write us an offer, but I'm sure there's another similar house in the top 3 as well. We're just not willing to give our house away. *sigh* SO...our most recent decision is this: if our home hasn't sold by June, we will take it off the market and just wait until next spring. Neither of us are really willing to go through all of the trouble of keeping it show-ready with a newborn. We will choose instead to finish the basement off and focus on our family. It feels good to have a decision either way. (Now I'm just waiting to sell it May 30th or something.)

*The family: is for the most part, doing well. The kids and I both got sick with Norovirus after eating what is believed to be some tainted fruit at a birthday party a few weeks ago. Unless you are just dying to see what it's like for your household to spontaneously burst into intestinal distress within an hour of each other, I highly recommend that you steer clear of the thing. Ick. Up until that point we'd never experienced simultaneous vomiting in our house, but whooooeeeee, we got a lifetime's worth in one night with that one. Thankfully, the kids were both fine after about 5 hours of madness and were back to bouncing off of the walls the next day. Unfortunately, my worst time was the next day...go figure. I was really, really sick that whole day but it took a full week for me to get back to feeling like I could actually enjoy food again and lose the nausea. Oh - and did I mention that 2 days after my little episode I had to do the glucose test? That was pretty brutal. (At least I passed though!) Chris is having a blast playing on an over 30 men's soccer team and we've had fun going to watch his games. Mitchell is also having a great time playing soccer...he has a game tonight, actually. He scored his first goal last week, and in true Mitchell fashion came running off the field cracking up to give us all hugs. We had to literally escort him back onto the field to keep playing. Classic! He is so proud of his "Player of the Game" certificate and marched right in the door to hang it up on the fridge. (I won't tell him that every kiddo gets one at some point - he thinks it is just the coolest!) Georgia is loving her gymnastics classes and yesterday she finally decided that she might not just die if she touched the bars. She actually loved the tricks they were helping them to do and was a total giggle box. Her new thing is doing "Princess Turns" -- up on her toes and everything. It is seriously cute. (Even if I didn't know her it would be cute.)

I think that's about it. Not much to report on me -- just getting through the end of the MOPS and preschool year and figuring out how we'll be spending our time this summer until Baby Loo joins us. I hope you're all well - and I really, truly do hope to jump back into reading and commenting on all of your great blogs!

Love to you all!!

Ahhhhhhh.... (that's me breathing, by the way)

2008-04-02T13:59:00.000-07:00

That's my new strategy...Breathe.

Breathe again.
Breathe some more.

Physically, I feel pretty good. I get tired, of course, from growing a little person in here - but for the most part, I really can't complain. I mean, my left hip is killing me and the heartburn stinks...just kidding! Seriously, it's been a pretty easy pregnancy so far. By the way, the new little baby thing on my sidebar - sort of wacky how (s)he floats around in there like a little slow-paced pinball, don't you think? I mean, I know this one's floating too - that one just looks like it's on the moon or something. And also - I put that there so you can know how far along I am even when I'm flakey and don't post for a month or something. I get that "when are you due??" thing a lot, so thought this might help!

Anddddd...because it's my blog and I can interrupt myself if I want to - I will tell you that Mitchell felt the baby kick for the first time today! Oh, goodness - that is for sure in my top ten Mommy moments right now. I got all welled up because he just got so, so, SO excited! He is a bit on the impatient (or five year old) side of life, so before today when the baby has been kicking he hasn't managed to stay still long enough to feel it yet. However...about half an hour ago I was sitting here putting pictures from his first ever soccer game onto the computer and the baby was ripping off some good ones so I called him over and wouldn't you know it -- BOOM. His eyes grew so big and just absolutely lit up! He said "Mommy, was that the baby? Did it kick me?" When I said yes he got the giggles and was just over the moon. He felt about three kicks, I think. I can still see his face and hear that laughter -- oh, goodness. It was magical. When I was pregnant with Georgia, he was still pretty young so he didn't really "get it" but this time, he is definitely hooked up with what's going on, so it was a wonderful moment. I just wish my camera's memory card wasn't in the middle of moving those soccer videos so I could have taken a picture of his face!

Oh, and speaking of soccer: (ummmm, yeah - can you tell how nicely this will flow today?) I have to tell you that this whole thing of him being on a team has been hysterical. Our little wallflower has decided that he is just going to jump in with both feet and his personality is coming right on out of his ears! The team's practices are Sunday afternoons and we didn't know it (wouldn't have gone anyway) but the team practiced on Easter. The sad thing for Mitchell is that they also gave their ideas for a team name at that practice -- he was SO excited to throw out the idea of "The Buffaloes". I mean, his heart was SET on it. So, when he found out that they could only vote for three previously suggested ideas, well - that just was not gonna fly. (I was at home with Miss G for her nap, so Chris relayed this story to me, just so you know.) Apparently, the coach asked him for his vote and he said "Well, I'm just gonna call myself 'The Buffaloes' then!" The coach said "So you don't want to vote?" And he said he didn't. Then two seconds later, he did. And the winning team name?

The Fighting Machines.

I am pretty sure that was not the idea of the one little girl on his team, but I don't have proof. Other than, well - the name itself. Proof enough that it's not the work of a five year old girl, don't you think? Anyway - during his first game last night he apparently growled on the field the whole time he was playing. (Again, information from Chris. I was in the car with a sick baby girl.) I asked him about that this morning and he informed he that he was pretending to be a tiger. We agreed to maybe not growl during any more soccer games.

Anyone who knows Mitchell is probably not all that surprised that we had to make such a request.

Okay, so - back to me and my breathing. Physically, pretty good. Emotionally - well, it depends on the exact moment in time that you ask me. Yesterday, count yourself lucky that you didn't ask me. My husband did and whoooo - I bet he is still regretting that one.

BUT. My new strategy: breathing. Why breathing? Because. First of all, I have to, right? Second of all -- does it get any more simple than that?

Breathe in.
Breathe out.

I've been trying to be grateful for the little things in my life. The small joys. And breathing is one of them. So, when I get overwhelmed with it all - I just try to breathe and be grateful that I can. I just focus on being still, chilling out, and seriously - just being. If only I had a dollar for every time the scripture, Psalm 46:10 "Be still and know that I am God..." has come into my life lately.

Seriously. All over the place. So, I decided to listen to that and give it a whirl.

Guess what? It works. It seriously works. It's really given me some peace and calmed what I can only describe as an inner restlessness that I've felt lately. So, it's my new thing. I breathe.

Okay - I will leave you with a little snippet of Georgia cuteness. Yesterday (the day she was deservedly a crankpot) I heard her on the monitor waking up from her nap. She was talking and calling me, so I came up and opened her door. It appeared that she had fallen back asleep as I was coming upstairs, so she was laying on her tummy, facing away from me. When I opened the door, she picked her head up, turned and gave me the biggest two-year-old glare you have ever seen. She then stood up with her hair looking like she'd just walked out of a wind tunnel and loudly proclaimed "You no wake up ME!!!"

I couldn't help it. I laughed.

Which made her even more mad, which made me laugh even harder. One mention of finding some juice made her smile and say "Okay, Mommy - get me outta here!" Ohhhhhh...that girl is cute even when she's spitting fire, I tell ya!

Thanks for putting up with my randomness today. Feels good to just let it all hang out again. And oohhhh baby, is it ever hanging out! :) I added two of my fave crockpot recipes to the sidebar today, by the way. They are super yummy!

Wordless Wednesday...

2008-03-26T06:44:00.000-07:00

So, I can just hop back into this like I never stopped, right? Riiiiiggghhhhttt!!

Peek-a-boo!

Laying low...

2008-03-17T13:05:00.001-07:00

Hi, friends.

Just doing a quick check-in to let you know that I'm still here, everything is still fine, I am still plodding away. Here's a brief catch-up of what's happened lately...

*Sorry to leave you hanging on the house thing. It actually ended up snowing the day that the people who were really interested were supposed to come back for a 3rd showing. Their parents would have had to drive over an hour each way in good weather, so they just didn't come. My worst fear came true and in the week that followed, the couple who was once so interested in our home took a little drive and found a newer neighborhood about 10 miles up the road that appealed more to them. So...back to square one. As I told Chris, I wouldn't have been so bummed out about the whole thing had I not known how close it was. If I just knew that they'd had a 2nd showing and then nothing - at least I'd know, well -- must not have been for them. But we knew more -- that if their parents liked what they saw, they'd be writing us an offer. Just knowing that a snowstorm is what kept the pieces from falling into the right places? Hard to swallow. However, I'm aware that the same God we've been trusting in throughout this whole process is the author of that storm, so there has to be a good reason. Maybe it would have fallen through at closing. Maybe the next house we're meant to buy isn't on the market yet. Ohhhh... this brain of mine. It has me running in circles sometimes. So, *sigh* there's that.

*I'm 21 weeks along now and everything is fine and dandy with our little baby. It was a relief to get that great information from the amnio results and just know that everything is okay. I did send a long letter to the doctor who was so ummmm -- what was he? Let's just say the doctor that we were extremely disappointed in. At my last appointment with MY doctor, she was very sympathetic, apologetic, and glad to hear that I was writing a letter. She asked to be CC'd on it - that way he would know that she would also get a copy. I feel better not just whining about the treatment we received.

*The kids are good. Mitchell had his first soccer practice yesterday. He had so much fun and was so excited. I think he'll have a great time. Georgia started a Mommy & Me gymnastics class today. The first half was great. The second half was miserable. She loved the first half - especially the long, skinny trampoline that is literally half the length of the gym. Not so much in love with stopping the trampoline time. The rest of the session (probably about 15 -20 minutes, I'd guess) she spent in a crying, screaming, meltdown tantrum. Good times.

*Chris and I are good. We are keeping each other's chins up during this little uncertain time. Where will we live? What transitions do we need to prepare for? I've had some changes with some of my clients. He's still adjusting to his new position at work. We were both very let down with the house thing. Good thing we have each other. That's all I can say. Being married to my best friend is a very, very, very good thing.

I'll leave you with something that he told me I absolutely had to blog about. We got our dates mixed up and so I lined up my parents to watch the kids on Saturday, when really our little night on the town with friends is in two weeks. My parents (and the kids) were already excited to have a sleepover, so we got to have a night to ourselves. Well, being the wild and crazy kids that we are - we decided to go to Bennigan's for dinner, since we had a coupon. (And seriously, that's all we did. We came home, I put on pj's and fell asleep at 8:00 pm while Chris fell asleep at the same time in the bathtub. I'm telling you -- we are just pathetic sometimes.)

Anyway - so we're at Bennigan's. Not sure if you all know that it's an Irish American neighborhood restaurant/bar place. They get ALL kinds of excited about St. Patrick's Day over there. We arrived to two bagpipers (so not kidding) playing us in the door. I personally thought it was a little over the top, but hey -- I'm not so much a fan of REALLY loud bagpipes at Bennigan's. Could just be me.

So, we go in and sit down and I pretty much right off of the bat decide I need to use the restroom. (Par for the course these days.) So, I tell him what I'd like to drink and excuse myself. As I'm finishing up and getting ready to come out and wash my hands, I hear some women enter the restroom. They don't have to actually go -- they seem to be camped out in front of the mirrors chatting.

Now, girls - I'm about to give you a little lesson. If you ever want to see exactly how extraordinarily large you can feel, get yourself about halfway through your 3rd pregnancy and try this one. Oh, and it helps to be wearing a t-shirt and track suit.

I exit my bathroom stall and walk out to find three completely gorgeous, young, thin and non-cellulited women who were representing Killian's beer in the bar. They were all dressed in tiny, green tank tops, even tinier black mini (and I mean mini) skirts, and knee-length, black leather high-heeled boots. They were standing there fluffing up their hair, applying (more) lipstick and lipgloss and chatting about their shirts. One girl was telling one of the other girls that she didn't like the way her shirt fit because it was too big.

*Here's where I say "Excuse me" so I can wash my hands.*

The other girl says "Well, what size did you order?" She replies "A small. I should have ordered an extra-small like you did, Michelle. Look how much better yours fits."

At this point I realize that I now have to wedge back through the girls to reach the paper towels.
I swear to you, I wasn't trying to, but I was leading with my belly. I dried my hands off and waddled out the door as quickly as I could.

I sat back down in our booth and laughed as I told Chris the story. (Well, tried to tell him, actually. Those dang bagpipers were circulating around the restaurant and decided to camp out near us right about then, and I seriously had to semi-yell half of my story.) He said "Oh, I think that's gotta go on your blog. That is TOO funny." He's convinced it's not the same without actually seeing me re-enact my belly-leading waddle to the paper towel machine.

So. Anyway. You are now officially caught up with me.

I don't know -- I might try blogging more often here again. I just am kind of in a little funk (again, I know - I'm aware) and get sick of rehashing it over and over. But I'll try. Sometimes blogging actually pulls me out of it. I'll also try to make the bloggy rounds more often. I've been spending more of my down time reading these days -- sort of a little escape of sorts. But I'll try.

Love and hugs, bloggy friends. Love and hugs.

Could it be?!

2008-03-02T04:34:00.000-08:00

After 7 lonnnnnggggggg months of having our house on the market, we have a potential end in sight. I won't say I'm not getting my hopes up because I already have, so if it doesn't happen, then I'm prepared to be disappointed. I'll get over it.

But let's hope I don't have to, right?

We had some people come look at the house on Friday afternoon. I told Chris when I got home that I think they must have liked it because one of the packets for people who are considering a contract were gone and one of the chairs at the dining room table was pulled out -- meaning it looked like they sat and chatted about things there.

Fast forward to Saturday morning - the realtor's office calls to set up a showing that afternoon. I asked if it was the same people, but it wasn't. Bummer. Oh well, another showing is a good thing, too so we set it up. While we were out during the showing time, the office called back saying someone else wanted to do a showing this afternoon -but this time it was the Friday people coming for a 2nd showing! Ohhhh - happy dance! We were also excited because it meant that they'd see another card on the table and know that they have some potential competition. (Probably not, but you get the idea.)

So, on the way home yesterday our actual realtor calls. (This means it's serious!) She tells me that she just talked to the Friday people's agent and they want to come back for a 3rd showing this morning (Sunday) with their parents. (I guess it's a young couple -- we did the exact same thing here, I take that as a good sign.) Here's the best part of what she told me...

If the parents give them the thumbs up, then they plan to write an offer!!!!!!!!!

I *do* realize that it could be a pretty lame offer, one that will disappoint us and we'll have to counter and all of that, but still...for having NOTHING for 7 months, this has my engine running, I'll tell ya. Good thing we have two birthday parties this afternoon - -it will keep me from obsessing too much.

I will keep you posted, but just know that for now, I am super excited at the possibility of getting this whole thing resolved BEFORE the baby arrives. Or not right when baby is expected. Or right after. Basically, this is what I've been hoping for. I've been praying for God's will for our family with regards to the house situation, but my own hope and request was to get this all settled soon.

Have a great Sunday! Hopefully I'll have another great update for you soon.

Just an update...

2008-02-27T20:11:00.001-08:00

I should really be cleaning up the living room right now - it looks like a strong wind blew everything around, but I was too tired to deal with it before bedtime. Basically, I broke my own clean up before we go upstairs rule tonight. I also sat in my bed with Mitchell and had a fudgesicle date. Usually a squirrely, 5 year old boy + chocolate + my bed is not going to happen, but tonight, it worked.

Anyway - I know I sort of said "Hey, I'm having an ultrasound today" and then disappeared, which wasn't very nice of me. We did have our u/s last Tuesday, but it turned out to be somewhat emotional and confusing so I just decided to avoid the update thing until we knew what was what.

Because of my *cough* age, we were having a Level II u/s done. When I scheduled the appointment, the receptionist asked if we would be doing an amnio. I said that our strong inclination was to not do one, but that I didn't feel comfortable 100% turning it down. She said she'd put us in an "amnio" spot for our appointment, which meant we could meet with a genetic counselor, get any questions answered, etc. and then if we decided to do one after the u/s we could, and if we decided not to, that was fine.

Okay - I did say I would nutshell this, right? No? Well, I'm going to try. I'm sort of too tired to relive the whole entire thing at the moment, and I *have* to clean up the living room - it's bugging me.

Short version...right...short version.

We had the u/s. 99% of everything was absolutely perfect. Amazing. Still so absolutely amazing to see that tiny little person swimming around in there! The spine is what always looks so completely awesome to me -- I'm not sure why, but I am always thinking "Wow!!! Look at that!!!" Sweet feet, precious hands, everything was just so fun to see.

Now, about the 1% that was not so perfect. Basically, they saw something called a "bright" or "ecogenic" bowel, which means that part of the bowel looked as bright white as the bone around it. This can be attributed to the baby having swallowed some "uterine debris" (ick, huh?) or possibly having some sort of infection. On the much more serious side, it's considered to be a soft marker (more coincidental than diagnostic, particularly when in isolation) for some chromosomal abnormalities, like Down Syndrome for example.

Like anyone, this difference made us a bit uncomfortable as we listened to the possible explanations and their wide range of severity. Thankfully, this was one of the first things that the u/s tech commented on and it was followed by nothing but positive, right on track measurements and development.

So. We were left with the option of having an amnio done. Or not.

They told us that if it was the uterine debris thing, most likely if we came back for a follow-up u/s in 4-5 weeks, it would be gone as the material would be reabsorbed. Would that inspire more confidence that nothing else was abnormal? No, was the answer. (This is the extremely abbreviated version.)

All I can say about the actual doctor (a reproductive genetic specialist, or something like that) is that he was loud, pompous and EXCEPTIONALLY inappopriate about voicing his opinion. Again, to shorten the story -- he pretty much downright offended us in communicating his opinion about what he would do and why. We made our decision in spite of his advice, because we felt like it was the best choice for our family. In the end, if something was seriously different with regards to our baby's health and/or development, we decided we'd like to know sooner rather than later to prepare not only ourselves, but our children and our families for some things.

We went ahead and had the amnio done -- and whoa, nelly -- that was pretty painful. I think that half of it was because the doctor had me so worked up and emotional (and keep in mind I'd been awake since 2 am that day) that I couldn't relax at all. At. All.

Today I spoke with the genetic counselor and she gave us the wonderful news that everything is fine. There are no chromosomal abnormalities, and since I tested negative for the cystic fibrosis screening -- that is not a good likelihood. It was just so nice to get that reassuring news.

Had to edit since Rebekah reminded me that I didn't share boy/girl info. *sigh* Here's the thing, I want to find out and hubby doesn't. So we decided not to. But I'll tell ya, when she asked if I wanted to know yesterday and I knew this wasn't based on a guess on the u/s but was like FACT information, I had a hard time saying no. I also had a hard time not calling back. I told Chris last night I *almost* called back. He said it was up to me and he wouldn't be mad if I just couldn't take it. I think I just need to get over it. If he wants to be surprised and it's our last hurrah, then I should give him that chance. So, it's a surprise baby. We are both guessing boy.

And noooooo way could I keep that secret. No. Possible. Way.

And now I'll be writing a letter to the doctor about his behavior and lack of professionalism. He disgusted me and I'm appalled every time I reflect on his words and attitude. Just awful and simply unacceptable. Ack. Almost went into detail. Can't! Must go clean!!!!

ANYWAY - there you go. (And trust me, this truly was the biggest nutshell ever.) I came down with a pretty nasty virus/cold thing the same night as my u/s -- I think between being awake for 20 straight hours (I took Chris to a basketball game that night) and my emotional state being completely out of whack, my immune system was pretty weak. Now that I'm almost over it, I'm feeling pretty good again.

So, I'm off to clean the living room - here's a bonus -- especially for you, Jennifer P -- a picture of me right after Georgia's 2nd birthday party (that will be another post this week). We un-invited both our brothers/their kids and my grandparents since I was a sickie. Both of our parents decided to throw caution to the wind and still came -- my dad took this picture as they were leaving. I was absolutely exhausted and literally just climbed into bed (clothes and all) for a nap about 2 minutes after he took this. Enjoy the belly -- 18 weeks exactly in this photo.

It's that time again...

2008-02-19T02:25:00.000-08:00

...as in, the middle of the night. *sigh*

Most of my 2005 posts were probably made between the hours of 10 pm and 8 am. I was pregnant.

Hi. It's 3:25 a.m. at the moment. I'm pregnant. *yawn*

I'm just sayin'...this seems to be my thing. I believe that I brought tonight upon myself as I ate too late (and something a little sweet) and had horrid heartburn and well -- here I am. Law & Order is always on almost all night and usually will put me back to sleep. Not tonight.

As long as I'm up, here are two (as Chris calls them) "bloggable" moments from this week in our house.
*****************************************************
Here's an almost hourly conversation with Georgia this week. NO idea what it means or where it came from but she's pretty satisfied every time I play along.
Georgia: Guess what, Mommy!
Mommy: What?
Georgia: Charlie Brown! (cha-ee bon)
Mommy: Charlie Brown?
Georgia: Yeah.
(Uhhhh, nope. You're not missing anything. That's it. That's where she happily runs off.)

****************************************************
Mitchell made me get all teary-eyed at dinner on Valentine's Day. I made breakfast for dinner and the highlight for the kids was the pink, heart-shaped pancakes that I made. (In hindsight, very strange. I try pretty hard to not give them red food dye if I can help it and then I gave it to them on purpose. Go figure. I had planned the heart-shape thing earlier, but the pink idea came to me at the last minute. Next year, it's raspberry and/or strawberry puree in the batter, baby.)

Anyway, he was getting himself another pancake from the kitchen and Georgia said "More cakes?" as he was getting up. He brought the whole plate back to the table with him and said "Maybe we can share one, Georgia!"

We then watched with pride as he completely unprompted proceeded to tear a pancake in half. He put one half on his plate, then put the other half down on his placemat. He asked Georgia for her fork and began trying to cut the other half of the pancake into smaller pieces for her. He was pretty unsuccesful at that, so he put the fork down and began tearing off bite-sized pieces for her. Every time he'd hand her one she'd say, "Ank u, Mitcho" and he'd smile so big and tell her "You're welcome, sweetheart."

*sniffle* It was seriously just the sweetest thing. Chris and I just sat there and watched. Well, he sat and watched with a smile. I watched, smiled, and cried...'cause, well - that's what I do.
*****************************************************

I'll leave you on a good note: I have my big ultrasound this morning. In 4 hours. Guess I better try again for some sleep, huh? Oh, and no - not finding out what we're having but praying for a healthy whoever is in there. I'll update you on that front soon.

Night, night. (See -- look at me, being all optomistic and stuff. Pretty cheery for 3:39 a.m., huh?)

A Little Meme Action

2008-02-11T14:23:00.000-08:00

Nichole (who I didn't even know had a blog until the other day) tagged me for a Meme. Okay, I say...I have nothing else to write about at the moment, so here goes.

First, the rules:
(1) Link to the person that tagged you.
(2) Post the rules on your blog.
(3) Share six non-important things/habits/quirks about yourself.
(4) Tag six random people at the end of your post by linking to their blogs.
(5) Let each random person know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their website. (I won't be doing that. If you are like me and need a random topic, I tag you!)
(6) I feel as though there should be six rules, but there are only five. Go figure.

Okay---seeing as how I've done this before, I'll try to think of some new stuff.

1. I cannot STAND the sound of nails being filed (like on an emory board) -- it makes my skin crawl. Seriously. Top 10 things I cannot stand - it makes the list.

2. Last week I ate an entire bag of those round, cherry ball things that only come out around Valentine's Day. Oh, and they were super good.

3. I am now resisting the urge to either (a) buy another bag or (b) buy a bag of the cherry things that are like gumdrops in the shape of hearts. Clearly, I have some issues over here.

4. I have been craving pepperocini peppers this pregnancy. As in, I ate an entire JAR by myself in a week. I didn't tell my mom about this, but a few weeks ago she said she had a dream that I had a baby boy who was born with shoulder length, jet black hair. The best part? We named him Pepperoni and would call him "Pepper" for short.

Seriously??????? *twilight zone music plays here*

5. I just spent my $40 iTunes gift cards in the middle of the night last night. (Georgia's been having some sleep issues, which means I've been having some sleep issues.) The code you have to type in about drove me nuts at 4 am. The 8 looked like a B. I was talking (sternly) to the computer each time it would tell me "invalid code" and I think a little too loudly. Chris got up and turned on a lamp, glared at me and said "Maybe that will help." Ohhhhh - that Cabana Boy. He needs his beauty sleep.

6. If this baby is a boy, he may very well go nameless for a few weeks. We cannot agree on boy names. Let me rephrase...my husband has not yet realized the amazingness of my favorite boy names. (To give you some insight regarding the seriousness of our level of disagreement -- we have both suggested each other's favorite name to each other as a future dog name. Oy.)

....annnnndddd, there you have it. A mini-blog in a Meme. Who knew it would turn out so well? I'm off to play a rousing game of Hi-Ho-Cherry-O. Wish me luck - I usually get walloped.

Like I said, if you are in the mood for a Meme - have at it!! Thanks, Nichole - it was fun!

6 Years.

2008-02-09T05:42:00.000-08:00

It has been 6 years since we said our vows. 6 years since I saw him nervously turned with his back against the wall so that he wouldn't see me before the wedding as I came to wait at the back of the church for the ceremony to start.

6 years. Today. Wow.

We had plans to take the kids to my in-laws' house so that we could go catch a matinee movie and have a long, leisurely, late lunch and do whatever we wanted to do before meeting up with them at church tonight. Instead, my husband is sick in bed. I don't know if it's just a bad cold, the flu, strep, bronchitis, or what...but he is not feeling well.

We're kind of striking out on enjoying special days and holidays lately.

So. Instead of waking him up, I thought I'd take a few quiet (shouldn't have written that word) moments this morning to talk about him, our marriage and what they all mean to me. We were asked at my MOPS group last week what we valued the most about our marriages. My answer was so easy -- I am married to my very best friend in the entire world. It is without a doubt, a complete luxury to be able to say that and know with all of my heart that it's true. We have our vows (we wrote our own) framed and hung above our bed. Like most of the romantic, wonderful ideas in our relationship, this was his thought. His framed vows were a gift on our first anniversary and he mounted them on the wall that night. He got my framed vows on our second anniversary.

The words that he spoke to me six years ago hang above my head while I sleep, and the words that I spoke to him six years ago hang above his head as he sleeps. I love that. I truly love that, and it's so very us. We loved writing our own vows and every single year on our anniversary, we read them out loud to each other again. I love that even more.

I recently bought a book that I have been using as my own personal devotional for my quiet time in the mornings. It's called The Power of a Positive Wife, by Karol Ladd. I just wanted something that could really help me get through what will definitely be a year of transition for me as a wife and mother. Adding this third child to our family is exciting, but it also has stirred some feelings of anxiousness and uncertainty in me, so I thought I'd be proactive and just arm myself with thoughts, scriptures and knowledge that I can meditate on in those moments where you wonder what in the world you are doing. I am the kind of person that has a tendency to project my own feelings onto those around me, and I'm trying very hard to change the way that it happens when negative, yucky stuff comes up. We have a good marriage today. Like everyone else, we have our struggles and difficulties, but overall, I know that we both have a lot of confidence in ourselves as a couple and feel that we have a solid marriage. My hope is that we can have an even better marriage tomorrow, and I'd love to be the catalyst for that kind of change.

So, I think that I have found a little guidepost for myself in my quest to better myself as a wife. Here is an excerpt from the first chapter...the bold part essentially puts to words the desires of my heart.

Here it is: The most important ingredient in the recipe for a great wife is God-centeredness (not husband-centeredness). First and foremost, a great wife is a godly woman. Not necessarily a church lady or a Bible-study attendee or even a prayer-circle leader. All of these are good things to be, but a godly woman has the distinct characteristic of having a deep and vibrant love relationship with God. She is a woman who loves the Lord, her God, with all her heart, mind, soul and strength.

Why does a godly woman make a great wife? Let's examine the blessings that overflow from her life.

A godly wife forgives, loves, serves, and encourages her husband as a natural outpouring of her love and devotion to her heavenly Father. She isn't demanding, controlling, or overbearing, because she walks in God's grace and offers that grace freely to her husband and others. She reflects the positive qualities of the fruit of the Spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.

Her walk with God allows her to keep the other areas of her life in balance. She doesn't sweat the small stuff, but focuses on things of eternal value. Nor does she live on a performance track, trying to please her husband in order to gain his approval. She looks to God, not her husband, for affirmation and acceptance. A God-centered wife enjoys her relationship with her husband, understanding that both husband and wife are God-given complements to one another. She finds her joy, peace, and inner strength from the only true source: God himself.

You may be thinking, Come on. No one is that perfect! You're right. No one is - but that's the great thing about God's redemptive power. God is in the business of taking weak, ordinary, sinful creatures; redeeming them; and changing them into beautiful new creations. His power and work in our lives make us better than we could ever hope to be on our own.

So, there you go. My blueprint for where I'd like to go and who I'd like to be.

I love my husband so very, very much and all I want to do is make this year better than the last year. It would be fantastic if I could turn this year into an opportunity to make it a foundation for improving our marriage in ways I never thought possible. I'm excited just thinking about it.

Happy Anniversary, honey. I love you so much more than I ever thought I could, and today more than yesterday. I know what you're going to say, too.

And no, I love YOU more.

Ummm - definitely need some work.

2008-02-06T12:10:00.000-08:00

Not really time for a big post, but as I previously mentioned -- I'm in the process of digging out in many areas of life. I've been trying to find time to put back into my time in the Word and in prayer. Well, yesterday I tried (not so bright of an idea in retrospect) to do my Bible study lesson while the kids were playing quietly.

Quietly lasted about 2.2 minutes.

I have to laugh this morning because looking back, the lesson I was in the middle of was about balancing priorities, making wise choices, and spending time with family. I was really enjoying what I was reading and learning and thinking about.

When quietly ended - so did my patience. I ended up getting pretty testy with the kids. Yes, right smack dab in the middle of my Bible study lesson.

What a nerd!!

So, yeah -- I've got my shovel out and I'm digging the best I can, but there is much work still to be done around here. (Oh, and by the way, I know that pobody's nerfect and all of that - it's just so humbling to think of the fabulous timing I have.)

Hope you're all well...I'll be checking in again soon. I promise! I will even try to get a picture of my ever-growing belly. It is starting to freak me out size-wise -- it's something to behold for me as I'm much bigger than I was with the other two at this point. (I know that's typical for a 3rd baby - but whoooeeee...a little intimidating to think that I still have 25 more weeks for it to grow!)

Toodles, my friends.

Tips From Tara...

2008-01-24T14:53:00.001-08:00

Tip #1:
When lending out maternity and/or children's clothes to friends and family, I now know that it is imperative to relay in very specific terms that you are LENDING said clothes. Not GIVING said clothes. There was a slight misunderstanding in that department last time I lent out my maternity things and as a result, I'm now down to one pair of pants and one pair of sweat pants. The jeans? Black velvet pants? Favorite black maternity pants ever? All gone. Consigned or given away to someone else she didn't feel she could get them back from. (I still have many of my things, just not several items that I really liked.)

*Sigh*

So, I'll be going shopping for maternity clothes this weekend. I need to psych myself up.

Tip #2:
Never, ever discuss a birthday party theme with a one Miss Georgia Reagan a good month and a half prior to her birthday. Not only will she change her mind as the wind blows, but she will also bring up the 143 different themes every time she sees and/or hears anything that reminds her of them.
All.
Day.
Long.
(In case you're curious -- the current favorite is Mickey Mouse with Dora, Blue's Clues and Hello Kitty making a nice showing.)

Tip #3:
If you have no idea what to have for lunch, I highly suggest the following sandwich. I made it on a whim today and have been thinking about going to the store for more avocado ever since then so I can have another tomorrow!!
*Toast 2 slices of your favorite bread (I did a good multi-grain wheat.)
*Slice up some avocado, tomato, cucumber, red pepper, and grab a nice leaf of romaine
*When the bread's done toasting, spread on 1 wedge of light laughing cow garlic & herb cheese
*Pile on the veggies and give it a good smush
Heavenly!! (And hellooooo - veggie city, baby!!)

Tip #4:
If you own jumper cables, try putting them in your trunk. Hanging them on a peg in the garage, not so helpful unless your car conveniently dies in your garage. **Key element for Tip#4: If your husband happens to take them out for some reason, please have him alert you to this fact or replace them when he's done with his little project.**

Tip #5:
If you are ever in a situation with a girlfriend whose van needs a jump, remain calm. Simply call your husband and ask him to walk you through it. It is actually sort of fun when you succeed and don't end up blowing up both vans and all 5 precious children inside of them. Oh -- and word to the wise -- the little clampy things are supposed to shock a little bit, but try ever so hard not to let them touch.

You're welcome.

Blah Blah Blah...

2008-01-21T02:08:00.000-08:00

In other words -- danger -- random thoughts ahead!

Okay, it's 3:09 a.m. This probably will lack direction and focus, so beware.

Thank you, bloggy friends -- your love, support and encouragment is so very appreciated. Jennifer, I especially appreciate your comments and have thought about them several times since I read what you wrote. I think you are a wise woman, and I wish you lived close enough to just sit with a hot cup o' something and listen to you tell me I'm actually *okay* and that this is all just normal and to cut myself a break now and then. You seem to be quite good at that!!
*******************************************
Blah blah blah reminds me of a funny Mitchellism from this week. He was peeved at Chris for something and decided that whining to me about it was a great idea. Not so much. I was fighting the urge to just sleep on the couch so I said "Mitchell, if you are unhappy with your Dad, then it's your job to tell him how you feel. Tell Daddy 'I don't like it when you blah, blah, blah because blah, blah, blah.' Then he'll know exactly why you're upset and he can explain why he did/said what he did. Whining to me isn't going to help much." I hear him stomp about 20 steps into the kitchen (there's a half-wall thing I can't see over) and say "Daddy, I don't like it when you blah, blah, blah because blah, blah, blah. Got it?!" Oh. My. Word. I am very surprised one of us (Chris and I) didn't pee our pants. Even Mitchell got the giggles over it. And guess what? No more peevy Mitchell. Too busy laughing at the blah, blah, blahs.
*******************************************
Georgia has been super interested in going on the potty this week. Mitchell was about as difficult a child to train as I imagine there is and I about drove myself insane in the process of the process, so I promised myself that she would drive this bus. And...she is. For a few weeks a couple of months ago, she wanted to sit on the little potty all the time. So we let her. And she'd sit. And get off. And sit. And get off. And it drove me crazy sort of - but it was really no big deal. No piddle. No nothing. Just lots of giggles from her thinking she was THE coolest big girl in all the land.

Fast forward to this week. For some reason, she is all about the potty seat that fits on the actual toilet. She'll sit on her little potty now and then but she is most interested in sitting on "Emo Wod." (Georgia speak = Elmo's World, a.k.a. - the Sesame Street potty seat.) So, tonight at the dinner table, my little rose petal was tooting very loudly and announced "I poop!" I just thought I'd throw out the offer to sit on the potty. It was met with a very enthusiastic, "Yeah!!!!" Upstairs we went. Lots of tooting, which in turn meant lots of Georgia giggles. One thing that helped get Mitchell started with the whole idea of pee-pee in the potty was what we call "Pee-pee water." It's basically an ounce or two of warm water poured on the bits to get that feeling started. I asked if she wanted some pee-pee water and she said yes. As I turned off the water I heard some tinkles. She went pee-pee in the potty!!! She's not even two!!! For a mom who didn't get to wrap up the whole potty training thing until her son was pushing four, this was HUGE news!! I started giggling and laughing and telling her how proud I was of her...it was so fun. The boys both came running and it was this big, fun "Yay, Georgia" thing.

And then I about cried. Can she REALLY be this big? Can she REALLY be old enough to do stuff like this? *sigh* I guess so. She'll be two next month, and I think she is doing her best to snap me out of my denial about the whole thing.

On the up side -- the possibility of only having ONE in diapers has me motivated to help her follow her potty interest!
*******************************************
I went to coffee (well, I had a cider) with a friend today. She is one of my oldest and dearest friends. She is 5 weeks ahead of me in her pregnancy, and though this will be her 3rd child, this is her 1st pregnancy. (She and her husband have adopted two girls. They didn't think they were able to get pregnant, so like me, this is a surprise package.) We met at the bus stop when we were 15 and have been close friends (sister-like) ever since. In fact, the picture at the top of my blog was taken at a girls' weekend with her and another good friend and she has her arm around me in the little picture of me in the brown shirt up there.

Anyway -- did I mention I would probably ramble?? -- we met for coffee today. I left the house at 1:45 pm. I thought it would be an hour or so. Uhhh - YEAH. At 4:30 I said that I should probably go in about 15 minutes. At 4:54 my cell phone rang. Chris was wondering if I had decided to run off with her and wanted to know just how big my cup of coffee was. After I hung up with him, exactly 2 minutes later, her cell phone rang. Her hubby was making sure she was okay since he hadn't heard from her. We decided that the little ones had probably been up for longer than 30 minutes and were interfering with football viewing and had a good chuckle about that.

I think we were both reluctant to leave. It was like we stepped into a little bubble for a few hours. Our friendship has gone through several ups and downs and we actually almost lost it all one time, but in the end, we are always closer than we've ever been. Neither of us could remember the last time we did this -- with anyone. Just went and sat and talked. And talked. And laughed -- oh, man did we laugh. And compared weak bladders and growing tummies.

I get all teary when I think of the gift it is to share this journey with her. We were both so sad that when Georgia was born, she couldn't come to the hospital. I wanted her to be able to witness her birth because she hadn't been able to be in the room when either of her daughters were born, and well -- she is just one of those people that I know the experience would have meant the world to. Of ALL of the days -- she ended up having a severe migraine and couldn't get out of bed. It was so sad for both of us because we wanted it so much, but now - -here she is about to have her OWN birth experience. Amazing.

Oh, and her dad said the coolest thing when they announced their pregnancy. He said that he was so glad they were unsuccessful in getting pregnant for so many years because otherwise they wouldn't have Madeline and Mara. I get teary every time I think about that. God truly does work in ways that we can't possibly understand until it's in our rearview mirror sometimes.
******************************************
Okay - I think that's it for now. I'm about to crawl back into bed and attempt to sleep again. Wish me luck. I promise, I'll be back in the bloggy saddle here soon. I miss reading everyone else's blogs and seeing what you're all up to.

I think I'm almost all the way out of my little hole. Thanks for lending me your shovels.

Buried.

2008-01-15T15:26:00.000-08:00

Okay, for starters... I have sort of gotten myself into a rut. Okay, not sort of. I just have.

I'm sick.
The kids are sick.
I'm tired.
I'm pregnant.
I just don't have time.
Repeat.

The above has been my mantra for the last oh -- three weeks or so. For everything under the sun.

Cleaning? Mantra.
Time in The Word? Mantra.
Exercise? Mantra.
Fun stuff with the kids? Mantra.

Okay - now I *will* cut myself a little bit of slack. I have been sick. The kids have been sick. I am most certainly pregnant. I don't know if I've EVER been this tired in all my life. True. All true.

But.

I can make a good mantra. I can get myself out of this "buried" condition. A month or two ago I was happier than I'd been in quite some time. I was eating fantastically. I was spending time in The Word each and every day and loving it. I was participating in two Bible studies regularly. I was working out several times a week.

Now -- not so much. For any of it. *sigh*

I do, honestly - feel buried. Under the blahs. Under life.

But I can get out. I know I can. And I will. So, no worries.

Okay - so speaking of buried. Here's that post I mentioned like a month ago that has been knocking around inside of my brain. Ironically, it's about things being buried, too.

Alot of our stuff is in storage right now. Obviously, not things that we use every day or on a somewhat regular basis. Most of the stuff are things that we want to use again in the new house (wherever that may be) -- train table, formal serving dishes, our overstuffed rocker recliner, etc.

Well, when we went to get our stuff out for the holidays (ALLLLL of our Christmas decorations were in there), I was struck by how buried it all was. How boxes and boxes of other "stuff" made getting to what we were actually looking for so very difficult. We had to wade through very tiny walkways, stand on desks, etc. to make sure that the box at the very bottom of the back pile was indeed Christmas stuff.

Then, once we got all of the things out that we needed, we had to put the rest of the boxes and items back in...only they didn't fit the same way. There were gaps and holes where the things we'd taken out had once been. Now some boxes stacked akwardly. Some furniture had to be rearranged again. Things like that.

It just struck me as we drove away how similar that is to my own heart and the "junk" I have stored in there. Sometimes in order to dig deep and get to the things that I really need to have and deal with right now, I have to unpack some other things that I didn't even know were jumbled up in there. I guess the thing that jumped out to me is that so many times, I have things buried in my heart and half the time, the things I have to deal with in order to find what I'm looking for I thought I'd dealt with long ago.

Here is where I'd usually elaborate, but it's taken me two attempts to get THIS much written down so I'll stop here. I'm 12 weeks along now and am off to the OB's office in a few hours for my 2nd appointment. I'll keep you posted.

A sincere thank you for all of the love and "where are you" check ups. I'm here. I'm tired. I'm fine.

I'm buried, but digging out.

Off to a rockin' start...

2008-01-06T02:35:00.000-08:00

So.

Last time I posted I told you how we were going on a 4 day mini-vaca as a family and were excited to be leaving the sickies behind as we rang in 2008 as a healthy, relaxed little group.

Welllll...it didn't quite work out that way.

On Saturday we spent the day packing up our stuff (more of a "me" than a "we"), putting Christmas stuff away, shoveling walks (that was more of a "he" than a "we"), and finally loading all of our stuff and ourselves into the van. Seriously - you would have thought we were going for 4 weeks, not 4 days -- that thing was packed to the gills! We had already decided to just avoid the headache of taking the kids out to eat and instead brought enough food and drinks to last us the whole time. Also, the hot item of the week had been the new kitchen, fake food and tea sets that arrived at Christmas, so we decided to bring those along. (The kitchen barely comes up to my waist -- it's tiny. The fake food and tea sets are all in one 3-drawer rolling plastic bin, so it was easy traveling with those.) We also loaded up a bag full of trains and books. We were all set!

We planned on leaving around 1 but didn't get on the road until about 3. Not a big deal until we decided we needed to make two stops once we got into our little mountain town. By the time we got to the condo, checked in and got everything unloaded it was about 6. I think it was around this time that I told Chris I felt like I was getting sick. My throat was starting to hurt, I had a headache and I just felt a little "off". (Remember that Mitchell and I were both already on antibiotics for strep at this point.) I sort of shrugged it off though because I assumed it was just from having a busy day and not staying totally on top of drinking enough water, so I just started drinking a lot of it right then.

We had a fun night and made some pizzas for dinner. There was a great gas fireplace in the living room which really warmed the whole room -- and it was so cozy and relaxing. (The kids did a wonderful job of staying away from it, too!) The kids were so excited to be in the mountains and it was snowing off and on, which was beautiful to watch. Mitchell was already asking to go play outside in the snow, and we promised him that we would the next day.

We are a sports-loving family, so we were all having fun watching football together - especially since Mitchell insisted on bringing his new Broncos outfit and helmet with him. He loves to pretend he's in the game and "helping the team" - it makes us laugh to see him running around in his own little football game. Such a goof! The only problem that we found was that the large, rectangular window above the couch was REALLY drafty...super drafty. That weekend was filled with high wind and very cold temperatures so we had to improvise with some extra pillows and sheets to block the draft. We never got it completely sealed off but it was much better after our little alteration. The kids also had fun "making dinner" and just playing together in the living room.

We got everyone settled into bed that first night -- Georgia didn't really even fight sleeping in her pack n' play, which was fantastic! There was a little cut-out closet with no doors right inside of our bedroom that made the perfect, cozy little spot for her. Mitchell ended up just sleeping with us. We have a queen sized bed at home, so this HUGE king bed had more than enough room for all of us. Chris and I were both exhausted, so we all went to bed at the same time.

The next morning (Sunday) when I woke up - I knew I was about to get hammered. (I should mention here that we had some "people" over for dinner on Friday night and it turns out that one of them had been sick in bed with a bad cough/cold and the chills *read: fever* all day, yet didn't tell us this and still came to dinner at our house so I was hoping against hope that this wouldn't happen. I'm trying VERY hard not to be bitter or angry about this, as I'm sure you can understand.) I felt absolutely HORRIBLE and feverish. I also was starting to cough and every time that I did it felt like my entire throat and chest were literally on fire. (You know how it feels when you run in really cold weather? That burning?) Mitchell was also starting to cough a bit, which worried me as I was sure he'd soon be feeling like I was. We got everyone fed and sort of got our stuff a bit more settled in the kitchen and living room. It really is so very beautiful up there -- and the kids, like us, were amazed by the view out of our window. We all sat taking it in for awhile, watching for birds and squirrels and other wildlife. There were some gorgeous bluejays that kept flying in and out of the trees right off of our deck.

Mitchell was begging all morning to go outside, so we decided that since the wind hadn't kicked up too much yet, that it would be as good a time as any. (Good thing - the 20 minutes we were outside was it for the WHOLE weekend!!) I really can't believe that I'm putting this picture in here -- you can see how great I felt. Oh, and for the record, I didn't even BRING my makeup bag with me on the trip so just know that. (And BethAnne, my friend, I don't even want to HEAR about another horrible hair/no makeup day from you -- I've clearly trumped you but good in the looking glorious department.) Anyway - it was pretty cold out there (but then again, I had a fever) so we didn't stay long but the kids had so much fun just tromping around in the snow outside of our complex. They cleared the whole picnic table off -- I think that's what took the most time -- and Mitchell made a few great snow angels. Oh, and sweet Miss G did her usual face plant in the snow thing, of course. Then we headed back inside for more football and some hot chocolate and snacks.

I'll give you the nutshell version of the rest of the weekend:

*By about 2pm that day, Mitchell and I both were feeling awful. He and I both kept our fevers until Tuesday morning. His got up to 104 but was usually around 102 and mine was around 101 most of the time. Tylenol and motrin (just for him) helped, but only temporarily. *Georgia joined in on the fun for most of Monday by throwing up once and having a low grade fever, but other than that seemed to be feeling like herself most of the time. *Chris ended up escaping the sick bug -- but I wonder if that's because he was already on Tamiflu from his little episode the week before. *We watched a lot of football and cartoons and I was thankful that there was a Law & Order Marathon on tv all night long since I didn't do much sleeping. *Chris ran to the grocery store 3 times for more medicine, drinks, etc. which was the only money we spent, so at least that was a good thing *He got in the private hot tub on our deck exactly one time but was in sheer heaven while he was soaking *I was actually awake at midnight on New Year's -- of course that's because Mitchell's fever wouldn't go down and I was worried sick while he slept on me. *There were super high winds and it was freezing!! all weekend long, so even if we'd wanted to go outside, we couldn't have.

So.

Here we are, back at home a week later. (And it's the middle of the night as I'm still not sleeping very good, thanks to this monster cough.) I'm still sick, though much better. Mitchell is the same way. Georgia drank out of his cup a few days ago and today came down with a 101.6 degree fever and a cough. *ding,ding* Round 2 anyone??

Still.

It's manageable. It stinks like crazy and I truly have not been this sick in years, but it's manageable. And temporary. And as Chris and I kept repeating to each other all last weekend while we were away...at least we're together.

I'll be back more often once we kick this thing for good. Hope everyone else's year is off to a better start!

Echo...echo...echo....

2007-12-29T04:00:00.000-08:00

Hellooooo.....
Helllooooo.....
Hellllooooo...

Is that an echo? I need to clear the bloggy cobwebs, huh? Ohhhhh, my friends...what a week it has been around here!

Both of my kids had a short-lived tummy bug at the end of last week. Mitchell's came back in the middle of the night the next day though (meaning more pukey sheets to wash!) and a fever came with it, which was different from Georgia who simply threw up twice and was fine two hours later. I took him to urgent care on Sunday after learning that our neighbor (who is also his classmate at school) had just tested positive for strep the day before and sure enough -- he had it, too. The doctor was nice enough to write me a pregnancy-friendly prescription, too -- that way I could save myself the $50 copay if I started having symptoms.

Anyway - for me the sad part (you know, in addition to having sick kids and having to repeatedly clean up throw up with a delicate pregnant nose and wash sheets 6 - yes I counted- times) was having to miss our annual "cookie day" at my mom's house. We get together and make all kinds of cookies for Christmas: iced sugar cookies that we really get into decorating, russian tea cookies, chocolate chip (a different than usual recipe), peanut butter, raspberry jam filled sugar cookies, Danish dapples, and peanut brittle. It's a big-time tradition for us and a day that I always really enjoy. Even though *I* wasn't sick, if there was a chance that I would be, I didn't want to be preparing food that 35 people would eat on Christmas Eve, as the cookies are our family's dessert every year. I also stayed home from making our yummy meatballs on Sunday which also bummed me out, but again - better safe than sorry. Sooooo, anyway - Sunday was a pretty good day - Mitchell seemed much better and the rest of us felt fine.

Then, on Monday - yes, that would be Christmas Eve - I ended up having the other kind of tummy issue allllllllllllllllll day long. Chris had to work and when he left for work it wasn't too terrible yet, but it quickly got to the point where I was pretty much non-functional. (I have hit that pretty much constantly nauseated point of my pregnancy, so that on top of the other stuff = not good.) I knew Chris had a really big, important meeting at 3pm though, so I just decided to suck it up and handle it myself. Both of our parents offered to come help me take care of the kids, but there was no way that I wanted to pass this stuff around so I just managed. The tv was on literally all day long and they ate things that required me to get up no longer than about 2 minutes: cereal, cheese quesadillas that I nuked in the microwave for 30 seconds, fruit, etc. The rest of the time I was either parked on the sofa or in the bathroom. I think Georgia must have sensed just how yucky I felt because all she wanted to do was sit on me all day. Literally. That girl never left my side -- I think it was the most still I've seen her. Ever. Such a sweetie -- and Mitchell was such a big helper to me. So, we made it through the day. By the time my husband fought traffic, stopped at the store for me and finally arrived home, it was later than he had hoped. He got the kids fed and into bed and then came downstairs with me.

He started acting really weird right about then. Now, I don't know if any of you have the type of husbands who will just readily tell you when they don't feel good, but if you do - count your blessings. I have one stubborn man who pretty much tries to hide and/or downplay his illnesses. It is always sooooooooo annoying when he's denying that anything is wrong, but on this day it was particularly feather-ruffling for me. After he tidied up the kitchen, he came and sat on the loveseat directly across from the couch that I was laying on. He had his hands between his knees, his head bent over and he was rocking back and forth slightly. I asked him what was wrong and he said he was just really cold.

Really cold? MY husband? I have never in our almost 6 years of marriage heard him say that he was ever slightly cold unless we are literally outside in frigid weather. Usually I will have on three layers of clothes, two blankets (so not kidding) and still be cold and he'll be talking about how it's hot in the house since I turned the heat up.

Anyway - I knew something was up, so I had him come over and let me take his temperature. It was 101.5 and I just sighed. Here we go again.

I'll spare you the long, drawn out version - -ha! Too late, huh? I ended up being up all night long with him (he slept most of the night though) worrying myself silly because his fever climbed all the way to 104.9 and wouldn't come back down past just under 102. He was in pretty bad shape and it was worrisome for me to see him have such a high fever, as that is COMPLETELY unusual. I did the whole alternating tylenol and ibuprofen thing every 3 hours and let me tell you how fun it was to convince him each time to sit up and take it. Uhhh, yeah.

Luckily, I started actually feeling much better during the night and by the time Tuesday (Christmas morning) rolled around, I actually felt like I was halfway human again. The yuckies had stopped and my stomach was no longer constantly rolling. I was actually hungry and enjoyed drinking some water and gatorade. Funny how little things like that will make you so happy sometimes.

We had cancelled our annual Christmas breakfast with all of the grandparents, but my parents still came over to see the kids open their big surprises. (I ran around - again - with the lysol spray and clorox wipes prior to their arrival.) Poor Chris managed to make it to the landing, where he sat to watch a safe distance away from everyone. After about 2 gifts for each kiddo, we packed them up and shipped them off to grandma and grandpa's for the day and a sleepover. I'm sure I don't have to tell you how sad it was for me to not spend Christmas with my children, but it was important for us to make sure that they still had an enjoyable holiday, and we knew that it was the best thing.

Chris went back to bed for a few hours and then it was back to urgent care again. I should mention that it was snowing hard all day on Tuesday, so we got to do all of this running around in the middle of a very cold, blustery day. The doctor told him that he had influenza, gave him a shot of something and a prescription for tamiflu. Off to the pharmacy! Of course the one that is about a mile from our home was closed, so it was off to the Walgreens about 20 minutes away. It turns out that half of the world was in the same place and we ended up waiting almost two hours for our prescriptions. (I decided to just go the cautious route at this point and take the antibiotics.) As we were sitting there waiting and people watching, we knew that the kids were definitely where they needed to be and we were thankful to just be together. When our name was finally called, we grabbed a frozen pizza and some drinks on the way out, which gave us a good laugh. We never envisioned grabbing our Christmas dinner from Walgreens. I also told him that no one had selected "pizza" on my what will you have for Christmas dinner poll, yet here I was.

As we drove home, a little piece of irony came to my mind. My friend and I write the group's discussion questions for half of the MOPS meetings, and one that I myself had come up with for our most recent meeting was about a holiday where things didn't go as planned. Nice foreshadowing, don't you think? On our slow, snowy drive home, we were talking about people we know that have critically ill children who are in the hospital, friends who have endured major family losses so close to the holidays, and all of our country's soliders who would LOVE to be driving home with a frozen pizza from Walgreens, as long as they were with their sick-as-a-dog spouse on Christmas. We still had a whole load of presents to open with each other and the kids, even if it was a day or two later.

We decided right then and there that we really didn't have too much to complain about after all.

So, the good news is that we *hopefully* got all of the sickies out of the way before we head out of town. We are off to the mountains today to spend three nights at a lovely little condo. Just the four (and a half) of us. We're really looking forward to it and have already decided that instead of killing ourselves to get the house all crazy perfect before we leave, we're going to call the realtor's office and tell them no showings this weekend. That really wasn't a difficult decision at all. At this point, it's all about our family and what we need: some time to get away together, relax and unwind.

Happy New Year, friends. May you all enjoy a year filled with love, peace, happiness, health, and an abundance of God's blessings. Thank you for filling my year with friendship, hope, encouragment and laughter. See you in 2008!

Still here...

2007-12-19T06:04:00.000-08:00

Thanks for checking on me, friends. I'm still here. Not feeling all that horrible, but not feeling all that great either. I had my first appointment at the OB's office on Monday and all is well. I even got to see the little bean on an ultrasound, so that was reassuring. My due date is now officially July 27. I've just been really, REALLY tired so blogging has been put on the back burner until I can keep my eyes open past 8 pm. Plus, I've been enjoying the fact that my husband has been getting home earlier and we've been spending time together at night. This week I have got to wrap presents as so far, I have wrapped ONE. Probably not a good pace I'm setting.

Seeing as how it's Wednesday and I'm in a rush to get Mitchell to school so that Georgia and I can go finish my shopping, I will just take the Not-So-Wordless-Wednesday path today. I *do* have a more thinking cap type blog in my head -- it's been there for about 2 weeks now -- maybe this week I can find a few minutes to get it down.

Love and hugs to all my bloggy friends. Hope you are wrapped in the love of Christ as the day of his birth draws near.

Our first family gingerbread house. We were sort of over it by the time we got to the windows and the wreaths. The kids loved playing in the backyard after the snow. Unfortunately my camera batteries died after these two shots. That last one is of Georgia after she face planted. Doesn't she look thrilled? It was pretty funny - she is SUCH a drama queen.

Thankful and then some...

2007-12-08T05:00:00.001-08:00

Okay, thanks to Alana for giving me the idea to keep my November thankful list on my blog. I'm moving on to December. It's a blessing to be thankful for so many gifts in my life...big and small.

*Cameras. I LOOOOOVE pictures. They are definitely on the things to grab list if there's ever a reason to flee the house.
*The telephone. Seriously. What would I do without it??
*Fresh Flowers. I love to look at them and feel so special when I receive them. They're so beautiful. One of God's amazing creations.
*Blogs! Hellloooooooooo...self explanatory, right? *hugs, bloggy friends*
*My husband and I crack each other up. Yesterday I hit him between the eyes with a spongy football the size of a tangerine and I bet we laughed for 15 minutes. I was crying I was laughing so hard. It's so "us" and I'm so thankful that it's true. We laugh all the time.
*A hubby who doesn't mind rubbing my back. Does it get any better than that??
*Ice cream. Uhhh, YEAH. 'Nuff said.
*Grandparents. They have made a huge impact in my own life and are tremendously influential in my children's lives. I'm so thankful to be able to say that.
*My pink bathrobe thing. So comfy!!
*Always having enough to eat. My children have never TRULY experienced hunger, and for that, I am so grateful.
*My iPod - Rebekah, you're right. Thank the Lord for iPods!!
* Tissue. We have been very appreciative of it this week around here.
*Shoes. I love them. I just do.
*Public libraries. I mean, free books? Come on...that is the coolest!!!
*The Bible. It is where I go to renew, refresh and remind myself of what REALLY matters and where my Hope can be found.
*K-Love -- that station keeps me in the right frame of mind all day long. It's especially good on days like today where I'm dangerously close to losing my mind!!
*Gingerbread Spice hot tea. It's my new thing this week. Just the little treat I need to warm me up - -and no guilt! Hooray!!
*We have two safe, comfortable vehicles. Being able to go where we want, when we want, and not have to worry about the safety of the car taking us is such a gift. It gives our family freedom.
*A warm bed to snuggle into each night. I can't imagine not having that and know that I am fortunate for having a bed at all, let alone a very, very comfy one. (And a snuggly hubby in there, too. Bonus!!)
*Mexican food. Specifically chile rellenos, cheese enchiladas and GOOD green chile. Not that I have weight issues or anything.
*MOPS...it has blessed my life in so many ways. I have made some amazing friendships and have learned so much about myself there.
*Hugs. Very few things in this world can make me happier or feel better than a good hug from someone I love.
*Okay, okay - I'll say it. I am thankful for Starbucks!!!
*We're selling our house because we WANT to, not because we HAVE to. We're not in foreclosure, we don't have two mortgages, we're not upside down in our mortgage. We will actually be upgrading. So our house hasn't sold yet. We are tremendously blessed to HAVE a home of our own.
*My good health. I'm SO appreciative of that.
*My girlfriends...each and every one of them.
*I'm a child of God, and have the freedom to worship Him. Amazing Grace for sure.
*I'm an American! I'm so blessed to be able to say that.
*Being married to my (totally hot) best friend. I treasure our love.
*My two beautiful, healthy children. Miracles -- both of them.

Mini-Me Friday #10 - A Biggie!!

2007-12-07T14:33:00.000-08:00

So...I expected to get some questions as to why I hadn't been updating my Mini-Me stuff, but I guess you were all just assuming that I'd already fallen off the wagon or something. Naughty people! You're supposed to be holding me accountable over here!! *wink*

Well, I can tell you this. I am going to be changing the focus of Mini-Me Fridays from a weight loss journey to a weight gain journey. You see, sometime near the end of July, there will literally BE a Mini-Me. Or a Mini-Chris.

Look what I found last Monday:

Yep! Baby Number 3!!

Yep! Total surprise!! (Yes, we know how it happens, by the way.)

Yep! We're excited!!

Nope! Don't have a preference for what we're having!!

Yep! Feeling pretty good -- nausea off and on, but otherwise just fine.

So, there ya go. The biggest Mini-Me update yet. Oh, but in case you're wondering -- I still plan to exercise throughout this pregnancy. I think it's funny that *I* of all people am actually excited to get the 3 new pregnancy dvd's that I just ordered this week. I am sure that I have already gained back all 8 of the pounds that I lost...I have been an eating MACHINE this week. I think that the brakes have been applied though -- last night was my first big food aversion and it was a biggie. I'm feeling more queasy today than I have pretty much all week, so I'm guessing that I'm entering "that phase".

Well, anyway -- there's the big news! *big, deep breath* We are looking forward to seeing all that God has in store for us with this newest little blessing.

Another Meme - Christmas Edition!!

2007-12-04T20:34:00.000-08:00

The lovely and talented, Renee tagged me for this one and I'm all over it as I was fresh outta bloggy material. Sweet timing!

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags?

Both. I have a large collection of both. In storage. And an ever growing assortment of gifts accumulating in the basement. Waiting for both a tree and gift wrap. Back to the subject though - I have both bags and wrapping paper, but when it comes to wrapping paper, look out. I have sort of an addiction to it. No matter how much I already have, I *always* buy at LEAST a roll or two every season because I just can't help myself. Oh, and one thing I also have started doing that my mom did growing up was to do covered boxes. Basically you wrap gift boxes in special paper and instead of tape, use glue to secure it and permanently wrap it. Then, every year that person gets a gift in the same box. They are my most favorite boxes in the entire world and some of them are literally falling apart but we still use them. I love getting gifts in my scottie dog paper (I had a scottie dog phase in 7th grade), or my paper doll paper (that started in about 3rd grade), etc. It's definitely a tradition I want to continue in my family. Mitchell already has a Peanuts box and Georgia will have a Princesses box this year.

2. Real tree or artificial?

Artificial. My mom is allergic to pine -- she stops breathing. SO - we have always had a fake tree. I actually am very turned off by the strong scent, so it works for me. I think my husband missed a real tree at first but he's all good with the not ever spending money on it again thing, being the thrifty man that he is. Plus, it's pre-lit. Hello.

3. When do you put up the tree?

Not as soon as I'd like. It varies every year. The year Mitchell was born I had it up the day after Thanksgiving with some help from my dad because I was ready to pop. We were going to put it up last week but did the outside lights instead. We're doing it on Saturday.

4.When do you take the tree down?

Usually the week after New Year's.

5. Do you like eggnog?

No. I LOVE IT!!! And Renee -- there is a GREAT, lowfat, safe for pregnant women eggnog that I discovered when I was preggo with Miss G. It's yummy and better for you - I love it and haven't bought the real stuff since! I put some in my coffee this morning, actually. You're welcome. :)

6. Favorite gift received as a child?
Ohhh, toughie. Hmmmm - I'm going with my walkman and Bonnie Tyler tape in 6th grade. Total Eclipse of the Heart, dudes. Like, totally.

7. Do you have a nativity scene?
Yes, three of them. Two are for the kids, the white, ceramic one is for the top of the entertainment center! We have this one from Current and Mitchell just got this Little People one for his birthday. Both are huge hits.

8. Easiest person to buy for?
My husband. I get a list every year.

9. Hardest person to buy for?
My grandma. I hate drawing her name because, seriously. The woman needs (and pretty much wants) nothing. I usually end up doing gift cards to restaurants for her.

10. Worst Christmas gift you ever received?
Oh, SO easy. The ex (a.k.a., "The Jerk") on our first Christmas together gave me -- and I promise, I am not making this up -- a joke book and a tin of popcorn. We were 24 years old and that's what he gave me. Uhhhh, YEAH. That was him in a nutshell.

11. Mail or e-mail Christmas cards?
Mail. Though at this point, I'm aiming for Valentine's Day cards. *sigh*

12. Favorite Christmas movie?
I think it's Rudolph, which I just watched tonight with the kids. Still love it. It was always my favorite.

13. When do you start shopping for Christmas?
Usually the first week of December, but I started a little earlier this year.

14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present?
I think I did with a bottle of red wine once. I just have never been a cabernet fan and gave it to someone who was as a hostess gift.

15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas?
Oh, another easy one! Our traditional Christmas Eve meal. It's a Danish thing (my great grandparents on my mom's side came from Denmark) and we always thought it was this very special meal. My mom and her cousin went to visit a few years ago, and it turns out it's a very routine thing to eat there. Who knew?

It is carb city, people and sounds strange but it is so yummy I can't even begin to describe it to you. Anyone who has ever joined us for Christmas Eve dinner has fallen in love with it, too!

Here's how you put it in the soup bowl (the flat kind work best, by the way):
*rice
*mashed potatoes on top of the rice
*homemade chicken and noodles (like a stew with peas and carrots) over the top of both
*homemade chicken/veal meatballs (that have literally like 10 sticks of butter in them) on top of everything

I have no words for the yumminess that IS this Christmas meal.

16. Clear lights or colored on the tree?
Ours are colored. I think the kids like it that way. Works for now. I don't have a strong preference. My mom has two trees -- her fancy tree is all clear lights with gold, crystal and white ornaments and is just gorgeous.

17. Favorite Christmas song?
Away In A Manger.

18. Travel at Christmas or stay home?
Well, we go to my parents' house for Christmas Eve, have all the grandparents over for breakfast on Christmas morning and go to my in-laws for Christmas dinner.

19. Can you name all of Santa's reindeer?
Not at the moment. I'm too tired. Love that Rudolph, though!

20. Angel on the tree top, or a star?
We have both. The angel is in SORRY condition though, so probably a star.

21. Open the presents Christmas Eve or Christmas morning?
My kids get to open one gift on Christmas Eve each year and it's always new, washed and ready to go pajamas to sleep in. Another tradition I carried over from my own childhood. I love it. Georgia's just arrived today -- here they are!

22. Most annoying thing about this time of year?
I think for me it's that stress sometimes wins out. Too many parties, too many gifts to buy, too many cards to mail, too much food to cook, etc. It's like good intentions pile up and sometimes result in the focus of the season getting lost. It's sad that it sometimes feels so hard to make the season Christ-centered.

23. What I love most about Christmas?
I love seeing the whole thing through the eyes of my children. The wonder of the story of Jesus' birth. The beautiful songs that they love to sing. The joy and excitement of the gift giving and receiving. The fun it is to see them adore the trees, the lights, and all of the decorations. I just think that there's nothing like the magic of the season to a child. I just love it.

As for tagging someone, I'm going with Sadie, Emily, and Teresa. Get on it, sisters. By the way, T -- I always want to comment but it won't let me. And, Em - I am trying to get you to move past the pumpkin patch, honey. LOL *smooches to you, friends*

A Hand To Hold...

2007-11-30T14:50:00.000-08:00

On Thursdays I work and am lucky enough to have in-laws that not just agree to, but love to watch our kids for me while I see my clients. The kids look forward to going, and their grandparents look forward to having them. It's free daycare for us, so it's a great situation all the way around.

Yesterday morning as we arrived, Georgia did something that really caught my attention. It was one of those things that I'm sure on most days I'd never notice, but ever since it happened, I have found myself thinking about it pretty frequently.

It was really cold yesterday morning so Miss G was all bundled up in her coat and hat and was tightly clutching her beloved Duck Duck in her right arm. I was walking beside her on her left side. As we got to the porch step that is much too tall for her to just step right up on, she stopped. Then she simply lifted her chubby little hand in the air.

She didn't look up.
She didn't look around.
She didn't say "Momma."
No, she simply held up her hand and knew with unfailing certainty that I would be there to help her. She was right...I was.

As you may or may not recall, I have chosen the word "Trust" to be my guiding theme for the coming year. There was my not-yet-two-year-old baby girl demonstrating for me what it truly means to trust. Without batting an eye, she raised her hand into the air, confident that I would be there to hold it and help her get where she needed to go.

I so badly want that to be me.

Next time I'm standing in front of a step that I know is much too large for me to take, holding tightly to that which I hold so dear, I want to without a second thought hold up my hand. I want to do that and know that He is beside me, waiting to take my hand and give me the help we both know I need.

Unfortunately, this is not a strength of mine. Yet.

I tend to get into situations that require a great deal of faith and trust and do a lot of talking about both of those things, yet it takes me a while to actually do the trusting and have the faith. It's not that I don't think the Lord walks beside me. It's not that I don't think He cares. It's not that I don't think He wants to help me.

It's that I don't make myself available for being helped. He can't hold my hand unless I give it to Him. Many times I make it as though I need to seek Him out with bullhorns and neon lights.

"Yo, God -- this way. I'm over here. I see a step. I'm afraid. I can't do it myself. I need help."

Sure, that will get His attention. Sure, He will find me. Sure, He will help me.

But He'll do it anyway, even if I don't say a word.

Psalm 9: 9-10 (NLT)

9 The LORD is a refuge for the oppressed,
a stronghold in times of trouble.

10 Those who know your name will trust in you,
for you, LORD, have never forsaken those who seek you.

Trust.

I keep coming back to trust in a big way, friends. I just never thought my little Love Bug would give me such a clear example of what it's supposed to look like.

Wordless Wednesday...

2007-11-28T05:42:00.001-08:00

Blue Tootsie Pop + Runny Nose = Not Good For Anybody

Spreading Free Holiday Cheer...

2007-11-27T14:42:00.000-08:00

Okay, I know -- two posts in one day! But I had to share! You see, last year one of my friends emailed this to me and Mitchell just about peed his pants watching it. Then we did it with Mitchell's picture and the child was literally doubled over, cracking up through the whole thing.

Well, folks -- it's that time of year again and this time, they've bumped it up a notch. Instead of one picture, you can use up to four.

So. Of course we did the whole family!!

I just emailed it out and have gotten responses that have ranged from "sort of disturbing" to "hilarious" to "wow". (Incidentally, the friend who said it was slightly disturbing OF COURSE tried it herself!) So -- make your own decision. If you (and your kids) love it, you can make your own when we're done grooving. Oh, and you can record your own voice on there, too -- but we were much too impatient to wait for that to finish loading. Enjoy!

Watch our family rock the house by clicking here.

Tag, I'm It!

2007-11-27T12:56:00.000-08:00

My buddy, Jennifer, tagged me for a Meme -- 8 Random Things. If you have read any of my blog at any time, you will know that I specialize in randomness. I know I just did 7 things about me a while back, but this time, I will NOT be consulting The Cabana Boy so it is all me.

1. I was bald until about the age of 3. Then I was a toehead. Now I'm back to being a brunette (natural color) with blonde highlights (a little help with those) and have more hair than I can handle. (Seriously - it takes forever and a day to dry because there is SO MUCH of it. I am not intentionally whining, for those of you who are about to tell me to count my blessings because you have thin hair and hate it. I'm just saying - it's REALLY thick and some days, it stinks.)

2. I am the only person in my house who likes pickles.

3. My nickname when I was little was (hold onto your hats, friends -- it's gonna blow you away)... Motor Mouth.

4. I have never, ever been able to consistently sleep through the night.

5. My husband and I had our son named before we were married, let alone pregnant.

6. I have always really, really, really wanted to go to Italy.

7. I am uber clumsy. As in, my college roomie nicknamed me "Ouch" for awhile.

8. I can do this funky thing called the 5-toe-spread where all of my toes spread out like fingers. Speaking of things The Cabana Boy just can't get enough of. *snort*

Tagging people -- hmmmmm...if your name starts with the letters A-Z, you are reading this blog and need something to blog about...I tag YOU! You're it!

The Cabana Boy Said WHAT?! And A Recipe...

2007-11-26T06:27:00.001-08:00

Just a few random tidbits here and there, and the chicken enchilada casserole recipe at the end...

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Last night at dinner -- I made Chicken Parmesan (yum!)with a new marinara sauce recipe --

Me: I am not a fan of this sauce.
The Hubster: I don't like it at all.
Me: *blink*blink* Oh.

That is the first time in our almost 6 years of marriage he's ever said anything like that. I actually just laughed and didn't get my feelings hurt -- after all, I didn't like it either. To be fair, he can't stand tomatoes and that's all that was in the sauce...so there ya go.

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About 10 minutes later, laughing about how bad the sauce was...

Me: So, did you just take your vitamins with Budweiser?
The Hubster: Yep, sure did. Blog that!

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I don't recommend not being able to find the word you are thinking of when you are a speech therapist. You don't get cut much slack. Especially when the word is "fast"...

The Hubster: What's up with that cop?
Me: I'm not sure, but he's not going very hurry for having his lights on.
The Hubster: Going very hurry?
Me: Going very hurriedly.
The Hubster: Hurriedly?
Me: He's going pretty slow, huh?
The Hubster: Stay in the shallow end, honey.

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White Sauce Chicken Enchilada Casserole
(so NOT a Martha Stewart recipe, by the way, Beth Anne!)

This makes either one 9x13 pan or two 8x8 pans.

4 medium or 3 large chicken breasts (boneless,skinless)
3-4 large or 5-6 small flour tortillas
2 cups shredded cheese (I used 2% monterey jack/colby)

Sauce:
5 oz evaporated milk (fat free)
1 can cream chicken soup (healthy request)
1 small can diced green chiles
1 small (8 oz) tub light sour cream
Any seasoning you want -- I used some garlic powder, salt and pepper.

Preheat oven to 350. Boil chicken breasts until cooked through. As the chicken is cooking, stir together the sauce ingredients in a large bowl. Tear the tortillas into 1-2 inch pieces.

When the chicken is done, shred it and stir it into the sauce until well combined. Spray the bottom of the pan with cooking spray and line with a layer of tortilla pieces. Layer half of the sauce onto the tortillas. Spread half of the cheese over the sauce. Repeat the layers. (I had enough for two layers.)

Bake uncovered for 45 minutes or until cheese is melted and everything is hot and bubbly. Enjoy!

Happy Thanksgiving!

2007-11-21T05:50:00.000-08:00

Happy Thanksgiving to all of my bloggy friends. May we all be reminded of the tremendous blessings that surround each of us, even on the worst of days. I've enjoyed adding to my thankful list every day - so much so that I have decided to have a Thankful December as well. I hope that everyone enjoys a wonderful Thanksgiving holiday -- enjoy celebrating with your friends and family and don't forget to make some time to truly count your blessings.

With a thankful heart,

Thoughts galore...

2007-11-20T13:34:00.000-08:00

This will be a totally random post, so if you are expecting a logically sequenced stream of thoughts, you might wanna keep on shopping around.

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I am having a very productive day -- and it feels so good! I had our dinner made and in the fridge by 8 am, if that tells you anything! Today was my day to take dinner to a woman from my table at MOPS as she's recovering from surgery, so I made a pan for her and a pan for us. It makes a 9x13 casserole, so I just made two 8x8 dishes instead. (Here's where there would be a lot of clicks on the remote if I were a tv show, huh?) I know she got a meal last night and will get one tomorrow, so I figured on Thanksgiving week, leftovers probably wasn't a big deal -- besides, the only disposable pan I had was 8x8. (That way she doesn't have to wash or return the dish.) I felt even better about my choice when I got there and her hubby had me leave the food on the table because he needed to make room in the fridge for it. Plus, now we have dinner ready to heat and serve, too! Score! Oh, and in case you're wondering - I made White Sauce Chicken Enchiladas. We're also having refried beans/cheese, brown rice and fresh green beans. (They got the same, except for I gave them one of the steamer broccoli bags instead.)
Yummy!!

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So, I just got off of the phone with my husband a few minutes ago and our conversation prompted him to say the following:

Hubby: You need to add that one to the list.
Me: What list?
Hubby: The list of random things about you.
Me: You mean the one that quickly grew into a list of crap that bugs my husband?
Hubby: Yeah, that one.

What was he talking about, you ask? My need to clean by hand our self-cleaning oven. Apparently, his label for this sort of issue is (and this is a direct quote) "There's clean, and then there's 'Tara' clean."

Ummmm, yeah. I have a few issues. But, to be fair -- the man was cleaning his bathroom with dish soap until I came into the picture, so ladies -- let's consider the source, shall we?

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I so totally did NOT want to work out today. (Like, totally dudes. Gag me.) However, I managed to scrape up just enough motivation and did a quick 30 min dvd during nap time. I feel good about that one!

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Did I mention that my oven is clean? And I love it that way?

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Yesterday at the pediatrician's office, we graced a P.A. that we'd yet to meet with our family goo. Both kids have snotty noses and coughs -- and for the past 4 years, that has meant a good possibility of an ear infection, so I took them both in. Mitchell had just started to fall asleep in the car on the way there, and I'm sure I don't have to explain the resulting demeanor to those of you moms with preschoolers who don't nap anymore. When they do fall asleep, and it's only for a few minutes -- whoo---eee, look out now. Or is that just him? Not sure.

Anyway -- so we're in there tearing up magazines and other fun stuff (uhhh, yeah - good times) and in walks Mark, the P.A. that we've never met. Georgia immediately shows off by blowing a snot bubble out of her nose and Mitchell literally crawls under the table.

Me: Hi! Welcome to our little world of fun.
Mark: *blinking like a deer in headlights* Hi, guys!

No, really - he was super nice and quite the trooper. In my defense, it was 2:45 and we'd been waiting for a while. Mitchell quit the shy act after about 2 minutes and Georgia did her normal charming act and all was well.

I think the highlight for me was when Mark used his little plastic hook tool to get a chunk of wax deep out of Mitchell's ear so that he could see the eardrum. He cleaned the tip of the tool off with a tissue and set it down to pick his otoscope (the little ear looker thing) back up. Mitchell saw the tissue sitting there and blew his nose with it.

Mark looked totally grossed out.
I just laughed and said "Well, at least it's his, right?"

I'm pretty sure we made an impression. Oh, and by the way - Mitchell does have an ear infection, and Georgia's was pretty close. (Even with tubes.) *sigh*

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I'm making out my Christmas list (of things to buy, not receive) and can I just tell you right now how LOVELY the whole "scaling back" effort feels right about now?? Not just the money we won't be spending, but the stress of shopping, wrapping, etc. for stuff that I am not so sure people will really use or love. I *know* that each and every thing on my list will be appreciated and I think it just might mean more, not getting lost among a pile of other "things." I feel so good about it -- and the shopping I'm really looking forward to is with the kids and Chris for our soldiers at war that we sponsor, and for the angel tree families we will sponsor this year as well. I can't wait!!!

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Alrighty then, I'm off to make sugar cookie dough. We're making football and turkey cookies for Thursday. In my very clean oven. Did I mention how clean it is?

Walking...

2007-11-19T05:39:00.000-08:00

My sweet, sweet hubby has been so wonderful to make sure that I get some time to myself on the weekends -- and I usually go for a walk. It's nice not to have to push the stroller, stop to dish out snacks, put jackets on, take them off, pick up sippy cups that have rolled under the stroller, etc. I also don't have to stop at the park for a wiggle break. I can just strap on my iPod and start walking. I get to keep walking until I want to stop.

I'm always surprised by the flood of thoughts and ideas that I experience -- they don't seem to make their way out of their little brain jail until I'm alone and just walking. Maybe it's because I'm always too preoccupied, or too focused on other things and other people in every other situation. Maybe it's because I don't take the time to just breathe. To just focus on me and the things that have been building up -- thoughts, emotions and ideas come in a steady stream as I walk.

Stress.
Anxiety.
Praise.
Joy.
Worry.
Fear.

It all seems to come out when I'm walking by myself. I was thinking about this yesterday as I was trucking along -- and it's like my walks become one big prayer. Sometimes I pray out loud, sometimes I pray silently, and sometimes I let the music I'm listening to guide my prayers. I pray for myself, I pray for my family, and I pray for countless others that are on my heart and in my mind.

I always thought that I liked to walk by myself because I didn't have to deal with the exercise-hindering issues that come with kids and strollers, but yesterday I realized that I like to walk by myself because it's such a huge release. You'd think it would have been more obvious, but for some reason it wasn't. Yesterday as I left, both of my (sick) kiddos were pretty much melting down at the fact that Mommy was walking without them. They were both throwing pretty sizeable tantrums, which of course, made me feel guilty for leaving my husband alone to deal with it. Instead of being annoyed, he said "Honey, GO. I got it. We'll be fine -- just go do your thing."

So, with a big sigh and a somewhat reluctant stride, I made my way down the sidewalk and away from the house. As I got about a block away, I called home and asked him if he was sure he wanted me to go. He just laughed (above the screaming in the background) and said that it was fine and the only thing that would make him upset is if I came home. With that reassurance, I set out on my way.

Obviously, my thoughts and prayers started there, at home, and as I prayed, I was aware of the fact that I was physically walking away from the stress and into my own little world. I wasn't going to work, not to the grocery store, not running errands, not volunteering at school -- I was going to be alone with myself, my thoughts, and my desire to improve my life.

What a gift.

Mini-Me Friday #9 - and a Me-Me

2007-11-16T19:13:00.002-08:00

This is gonna be a quickie while I'm waiting for my hubby to get home. If I end abruptly, now you know why! I choose him. Yay!

So, I lost one pound this week. I can't remember who asked, but someone asked how much I've lost. I've lost 9.5 lbs so far, which makes it 10.5 lbs away from my first goal of 20 -- and I have 5 weeks to get there. (That's the end of my first session with First Place.)

I feel good about things and know that I can do better. I *will* do better. I think this week was about more than weight loss for me, and the fog has lifted. I feel more energized, more joyful, and more confident in myself -- I finally feel like things have clicked in on this journey and I'm doing it the way that I need to. I'm more about the whole package than the scale, and it's been a LONG time since I could say that.

So, there ya go. The long and short of it.

Bethanne basically dared anyone who reads her blog to do a Me-Me, and because we were united in our tween angst of being Annie-haired-freaks, I will go ahead and oblige her. I'm tagging anyone who needs something to blog about and has seven wacky facts to share. (Basically, that's about 75% of my audience, I'm guessing.)

Okay -- here ya go. 7 (probably lame) things you might not know about me:

1. When I was growing up, I *hated* playing Barbies. This got me into many little squabbles with friends who were Barbie-a-holics. I wanted to play house. Or store. Or teacher. Or some sort of role-play game. (Yes, I was a five year old control freak -- started early, girls. What can I say?)

2. I am PHOBIC of lightning. I'm not talking "I don't like it" or "It scares me" stuff. I'm talking I go into almost hyperventilating, shaking mode when it gets bad. I will NOT go outside if I see it anywhere REMOTELY close. (This is where my definition of "remotely close" usually drastically differs than 99.9% of the population.) This whole lightning "issue" drives my husband nuts.

3. I had stick straight hair before I had kids. I know some women's hair falls out. Mine all stayed in, but it got curvy. Yes, curvy. Not wavy, not curly -- curvy. The first time I got my hair cut after I had Mitchell, my hair stylist accused me of cheating on her -- she thought I went and got a bad perm. Not so much. She right then and there appointed me the posterchild for what hormones can do to someone's hair. Oh -- and it gets worse -- it's only on like the bottom half of my hair -- not bottom half as in one piece of hair -- but as in thickness. So the top to middle of my hair is sort of straight and it gets crazier as ya go deeper. Not pretty. Not. Pretty.

4. I don't wash my face at night. I know, I know. I'm an alien. With a bad skin care regimen.

5. I do this thing that Chris has nicknamed "The Tara Shuffle" and it is off-the-charts in the nerdy department. Basically, my arms are stretched out straight in front of me and my legs are stretched out straight behind me and I run in place that way. Yes, it's quite a sight.

6. When I sit and watch TV, I don't realize I'm doing it, but basically I rest my hand (in sort of a loose fist) against my chin and my pinky goes against my upper lip. Chalk up another "drives the hubby nuts" thing.

7. Every hanger in the closet has to face the same direction. HAS. TO. As in NOT up for discussion. (By the way, the hubster just got home and helped me with these last two and suggested a &, *, !!! for this one. I'm a bit freaky about it.)

Okay -- done. There ya go. Happy weekend!!

Do you really want to hear?

2007-11-15T06:24:00.001-08:00

That was one of the "themes" of this week's sermon at my church. He was talking about hearing God's voice in your life and using it to direct your path.

One thing that he said really, really resonated with me and I've been thinking about it a lot this week. He said that if you are TRULY interested in hearing His voice, you need to be prepared and willing to hear him say NO. That's a good thing for me to hear because I can definitely get into periods where I perceive a non-response, when really it's just a NO. I am completely capable of being pretty self-absorbed and just waiting on the big YES that I know is surely coming my way. Really, I'm pretty dorky in that way.

Anyway...back to the thing I really wanted to share. He said that many times, God's responses to our prayers fall into four categories:

*No, I love you too much.

*No, not yet.

*Yes, I'm so glad you asked.

*Yes, and here's more.

In looking at my own life, I couldn't agree more with this. I really can plug into one of those for each and every prayer I've ever laid before His feet. I find, too, that lots of times -- the "Yes" answers start with the "No, not yet" reply.

Okay -- this is a much quicker post than I would like but I have to go sort $5,000 worth of cookie dough at M's preschool this morning. Don't ask.

Maybe I'll come back for Part 2 later.

Spiritual Gifts...

2007-11-13T06:19:00.000-08:00

I am on the steering team for my MOPS group this year and am really enjoying the Bible study that we are doing on servant leadership. Last week, in preparation for our discussion, we took an online survey to determine what our spiritual gifts are.

Here's the survey.

It was so interesting for me to do, as I haven't done anything like that before. Truthfully, I wasn't really all that surprised by my results -- they were kind of what I thought they would be. (I do have to add that #3 on my list was writing, so obviously this blog lets me get a lot of what I have inside out in a productive way!) Since you asked...
Tied for 1st: Hospitality/Encouragement
Tied for 2nd: Faith/Writing

One thing that did surprise me as I took the test were the occasional pangs of guilt about not saying "yes" to some of the questions. I wanted for it to be true about myself, but I also know that I could in no way represent that it was. It just wasn't me even if I wanted it to be. The other thing that I took note of as I went through the questions was that different people popped into my head -- I could tell "Yep, that's a spiritual gift for So-And-So" or "Oh, that's totally So-And-So."

As we were talking about our results during Bible study, the funny part was that most of us had trouble believing that our top gifts were truly spiritual gifts. There were lots of comments about how it just seemed like that's the way you do stuff...that's the way you go about things...that's just the way it is.

I came to the conclusion as I listened to everyone share that having that feeling is actually confirmation that they are INDEED spiritual gifts. Each person is blessed with the innate skills and talents to have those things be second nature, to be a part of that person's core. The fact that it is "just how you do things" says to me that God made it that way for you because he definitely didn't make it that way for everyone. Others that didn't have those spiritual gifts also chimed in, indicating that they wished they were blessed with such things.

I just thought I'd share this with you all since I enjoyed taking a closer look at myself in such a cool way. Try taking the survey with some friends, your spouse, and/or a Bible study group. The discussion is the best part! I'm guessing that whatever you are surprised with will be obvious to those that know and love you.

Funnies From The Bugs...

2007-11-11T06:28:00.000-08:00

I've been so caught up in my "ME" journey that I haven't taken the time to really have some good bloggy Doodlebug and Lovebug moments. I am going to remedy that one right now!!

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Chris: I can't remember what it was that he said, but it was something really dorky

Me: You are such a ding dong.

Mitchell: Mommy, don't call Daddy a ding dong. He's not a doorbell!

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Last night I picked Georgia up from the nursery at church and asked how she did. (She had on her Sesame Street jean jacket.) They said she did great and that they enjoyed having her. One lady said "She is so funny! I told her that I liked Zoe and Elmo on her coat and she looked at me and said 'My JACKET.' I mean she flat TOLD me, it's a jacket. Can you believe it?"

Me: Oh, yeah. I believe it.

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The other day Chris had just gotten out of the shower and was getting ready for work. Mitchell had just come in our room and I could hear Georgia in there making all kinds of noise in her crib. (Her room is attached to our room by french doors that we leave cracked open.) I went in to get her up and found that she had taken her fleece, footie pajamas off and was sitting in just her diaper. She got all happy when she saw me and said this while she rubbed her naked baby belly:

"Hi. Joja shower Daddy."

Yep, that's right. She was all ready for the shower, just like Daddy.

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Mitchell made a book the other day at school. Mrs. G. had written words for him (dictated, I believe) on the inside two pages, but not on the cover. I wanted to know what the picture of the cover was so I asked him to tell me. I got out the sharpie and wrote it on there. How could I not? I mean, it's not every day that Jesus drives to the park.

I should add that some of the drawing is hills. Some of it is Jesus. Some of it is children. And some of it (when he showed me) is actually Jesus' driving route.
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I think that my favorite thing about those two at the moment is that they really, truly love and I mean L-O-V-E each other. It's so fun to pick Mitchell up from school. Georgia usually doesn't even wait for me to finish signing him out in the attendance book before she's running in to find him. I have yet to see one single day where they didn't do a big, running, "The hills are alive" run toward each other with outstretched arms. Then they do this big, huge hug and giggle at each other. You would think by now, after about 3 months of this, that I'd be over it by now. But I'm not. I look forward to it every time. So do the teachers -- one of them was in the bathroom the other day when we came and she actually said "Oh, darn! I missed the big reunion moment!"

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So, there ya go. Life with The Doodlebug and The Lovebug. I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world.

Mini-Me Friday - Check In #8...ANNND...A recipe!!

2007-11-09T20:08:00.000-08:00

First things first -- thank you for all of the kind words, support and encouragement. I think that the scale just sort of was the tip of the iceberg for my bluesy attitude the past few weeks. I'm happy to report that I'm not feeling so "funky" anymore -- and that was even before the good news I got at my weigh in last night.

Yes, I said good news. I lost 1.5 pounds this week...so basically, I undid the last three weeks and am now back and ready to keep on truckin'.

I feel good about my efforts in all of my 1st Place commitments and know that I did the best I could this week. The funny thing is, last night after my meeting, I came home and had that "bottomless pit" feeling. I just wanted to eat. And eat. And eat.

And eat.

So, I sort of did...but not on anything that I felt horrible about and nothing that put me over on my daily exchanges, so I don't feel guilty. (And let me tell you what a great feeling THAT is to not lug around today!)

I also finally busted open the motivational cd's that came with my starter package and have listened to them the past few days. There really was some good stuff on there, and I've had lots to think about.

Okay -- I have to go clean up the house from today now that the kids are both snoozing away. I'll leave you with the recipe for my dinner. Jennifer's Veggie Stew (which, by the way, made me giggle because it has a roast in it! How awesome is that??) inspired me to make some vegetable soup, so this was my quickie, off the top of my head version. I'll put the "recipe" (ha!) below. Enjoy -- and Happy Friday, friends.

Quick And Yummy Veggie Soup
1 cup whole grain pasta (I used mini penne)
1 can diced tomatoes
1 yellow squash, chunked
1 zucchini, chunked
1/2 red pepper, chunked
1 tbsp extra virgin olive oil
2 cloves garlic, minced
Whatever seasonings you choose, I used about 1 1/2 tbsp of this salsa seasoning mix
2 cups vegetable broth (1 can) - I only used half a can because that's what I had, but it didn't make a whole bunch of broth.

Cook pasta according to package directions. Meanwhile, heat olive oil in a large skillet. Add garlic, squash and zucchini and sautee for 3-5 minutes. Add red pepper and tomatoes, and seasoning. Sautee 5 minutes longer. Add vegetable broth and cooked pasta. Bring to a boil, then reduce heat and simmer 5- 10 minutes. (This is also the part where if I would have had it, I would have added some fresh basil.)

Enjoy!!

Still grateful over here...

2007-11-08T06:36:00.000-08:00

This song seriously hits home with me right now and reminds me about the joy and attitude I want to meet each new day with. Enjoy and be blessed.

"How You Live" by Point of Grace.

A Month of Gratitude...

2007-11-06T12:51:00.000-08:00

Don't you just love it when someone else's ideas give you a little way out of a funk? I do!

Alana (who, by the way, is awesome!) did a "thankful month" post and I absolutely think it's just what I need, so I'm following her lead.

Each day this month, I will add to the "Things I'm Thankful For This November" list in my sidebar.

Blessings. I don't count them often enough.

Do you?

The blahs...and Mini-Me #7

2007-11-02T21:13:00.000-07:00

I got 'em. And I mean I have GOT 'em. I haven't been in a very bloggy mood lately -- I think it's because every time I think about writing something down, I get all blah-ish again. I'm blue. Funky blue.

So, the Mini-Me part of things -- not so mini. Up another half of a pound. This time, I seriously (and I mean SERIOUSLY) had to talk myself out of bawling my eyes out in front of everyone. I stepped right off of the scale and had to go to the restroom and compose myself. My leader that did the weigh in was very sweet (sigh -- AGAIN) and understanding, but I'm pretty sure that she might think I'm a bit nuts at this point.

I didn't say a single word during the Bible study. Not one word. And that's just not me. Well, it is, actually -- when I get upset, discouraged, frustrated, etc. -- I clam up. So, there is your explanation for my MIA bloggy status. I just don't have words.

The thing is, I know that I'm doing the right things. I can honestly say that I have nothing to be ashamed of this week. I fulfilled all of my commitments. I was accountable to myself and to others. I not only did my Bible studies, scripture readings and memorizations - I did them joyfully.

Which is why it really stinks that I let myself get down and not participate in the Bible study when I had the chance. I let "him" win again. I was right where he wanted me, even though I was *really* right where the Lord wanted me to be. I missed it because I got distracted by thoughts and feelings that I know in my heart are nowhere near what I was meant to be feeling. The upside to being quiet is that I heard some pretty great discussion from my fellow group members and even though I was a complete non-participant, I left feeling blessed anyway.

I think that's the thing. I need to stop looking at this through my own eyes -- that leads to seeing what the world sees, what the enemy wants me to see. My own eyes don't show me what I need to see. I need to start looking at this through His eyes.

Okay -- really. I'm such an idiot. Guess what I just thought of? My memory verse for this past week...want to know what it was???

I Samuel 6:13 "The Lord does not look at the things that man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance but the Lord looks at the heart."

Ummmm, yeah. I get it. I. GET. It!!! Can you say slow learner??

As my thoughts turn to THIS week's verse...

James 4:7 "Submit yourselves then, to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you."

Okay. Guess I have my game plan then. I have a devil to resist, friends. Oh, and there's more. I read these two thoughts while doing my Bible study tonight. It hit home in a major, MAJOR way for me, particularly given the verse that I put on my fridge last week.

"The devil enjoys placing before your eyes the things that are your greatest temptations. Images of food appear when you are hungry, images of bed and/or rest appear when you feel too tired to exercise, images of all you have to do appear when you are pressed for time and you haven't done your Bible study. All these images lead you away from God and what He wants for you."

"Satan is working overtime to make sure temptation is everywhere."

So, there ya go. That's where I am. That's where I've been. That's where I'll be.

I promise, I'll be back. I just need to go inward for a bit. Do some thinking. Let these thoughts rattle around a little longer. Love to all of you, my bloggy friends.

Happy Friday.

p.s. Earen and Renee, thank you for your check-ins and encouragement...they are like big, warm hugs and I can't thank you enough. I thank the Lord for both of you and the priceless gift of your friendship.

Mini-Me Monday - Check In #6

2007-10-28T19:25:00.000-07:00

Before I start in on the whole thing, I want to say that I think after this week, I might switch from Mini-Me Mondays to Mini-Me Fridays or something. It's hard for me to weigh in on Thursdays and then wait until Monday to talk about it.

Okay -- I just finished typing, and this is long. And ugly. And probably somewhat difficult to follow. Don't say I didn't warn you!!

Soooooooooooo...another week has come and gone. Another week -- annnnnnnnnnnd, I blew it again.

*sigh*

I gained another .5 lb this week. I know that doesn't sound so bad, and in the big scheme of things, I know -- it's not. I know exactly what happened, and I also know exactly what didn't happen this past week to get to this point, and let's just say I was in clearly in charge of both. I feel badly for the sweet co-leader of my 1st Place group. I hopped up on the scale (after arriving late to the meeting) and when it went back over, I asked if it was a gain. She said "Yeah, a half pound."

*Dramatic pause while those words echo around the room.*

As I stepped off of the scale, I let out a big "UGHHHHHH, WHY????!!!!" and basically threw a big-girl tantrum over the whole thing as I stormed out of the room. (I know, pretty mature.)

I know she gets it. I know she does. Heck, anyone who's ever had a weight issue gets it, I'm sure. The thing is -- what an idiot. I mean, first of all -- I have the nerve to ask "Why???" Come on, Tara...you KNOW why. Then, to just flip out like that and act like a total brat??? Nice, real nice. So, yeah...not the best week for me. I did apologize to her and of course she was sweet and understanding and not feeling the need to be apologized to, but still. So lame of me.

So. Lame. Of. Me.

Ever since Thursday night, I've had time to think. Think. About what really happened. And not even so much as what happened, but more about why it happened. (And I also realize that right about now, there are probably some "Does she realize she's talking about half a pound here?" thoughts going on, but really - it's just so much more than that.)

See, here's the thing.

I was so excited about joining 1st Place because I knew it was what I needed. A nudge not only for my actual weight, but also for every thing that's caused my weight to actually be a problem. I was so excited because it was finally a structured, concrete way for me to combine my faith with my weight loss efforts. The more I learned about it, the more excited I became. The first two weeks were great.

Uh, yeah -- honeymoon, anyone??

After that, back to the same old bad habits. Weekends killing me. Stress killing me. Emotions killing me. One slip up leading to the next. And the next. And excusing it all with the same excuses. Hoping to make up for it here, make up for it there. All the while never truly acknowledging what's going on.

What's. Going. On!!!!

Here's what's going on. Until Thursday, until after my little tantrum -- I wasn't doing any of this for me. I wasn't doing it for my kids. I wasn't doing it for my husband. I certainly wasn't doing it for God. I was doing it because I just kind of felt like I should. Like it was the way into some skinny jeans. Into a better looking, better feeling me.

After Thursday, I got real honest with myself in a hurry. I looked back over the first 4 CR's that I'd turned in and gotten back from my group leaders. (The CR is the Commitment Record - it's basically a daily journal of my eating, exercise, prayer, etc.) I started really looking at what I was doing.

I found that after those first two weeks, I started creeping over the limits for the food exchanges with my eating. Not by a lot, just a little. Then on the weekends, I'd not just creep over -- I'd march across the line and pitch a tent on the other side. Any victories during the weeks were wiped out by the weekend behaviors -- and then some.

Once that started to falter, my exercise started to wane a bit as well. I went from working out 4 and 5 times a week to 2 and 3 times a week. Still exercising, just ehhhh - half-heartedly and not as often.

What came next? A day here, a day there - no prayer time, no Bible study time, no scripture memorization, no time in the Word. Two weeks went by without me reaching out to encourage other group members.

Basically, one by one, I started to loosen my grip on the 9 commitments of the 1st Place group I'd so tightly held when I first agreed to follow them. As I read through my CR's and watched it all unfold, I realized that I hadn't done any of this for the right reasons. Truthfully, the only reason, and I mean the ONLY reason I filled them out at all the last two weeks is because I knew we had to turn them in, and I'm sort of anal about that kind of task completion. Basically, I was doing it because I knew someone would be asking for them and I didn't want to turn them in blank or say I hadn't done it. So, I did.

(By the way, I know I'm rambling now, but it's my blog, so I'm gonna keep doing just that.)

By the time Thursday night rolled around, I was sitting at the kitchen table waiting for Chris to get home so I could leave for my meeting. The kids had just finished eating dinner and were watching whatever TV show I turned on for them so that I could finish my homework. We had 3 things to read in the big 1st Place book, and I also needed to complete the week's Bible study.

Yes, that's right. All of it. That night. Because I hadn't done ANY of it. Nope. Not one day's worth. And to make it worse -- I was only doing it because we would be discussing it at the meeting. Oh -- and as for my memory verse for the week...I learned it that day. In the car as I was driving between my appointments with my clients. And only because I have to recite it as I get weighed in each week. Not for any other reason.

After I looked through my CR's, I got out my prayer journal and was ashamed to see that I hadn't written in it in almost a week. I had said prayers in between that time, but I hadn't taken a serious chunk of time and committed it to prayer.

What. Was. I. Doing?!?!

Humble pie -- at least it's calorie free, right? Goodness, goodness...I think that I have lived off of it this week. Something finally clicked. All of that reflection on the past 5 weeks was like a huge slap upside the head for me. (One that I desperately needed, I might add.) As I considered all of the things I'd done and not done, my thoughts were actually brought back to something I myself had *just* said.

While we were driving on our date last weekend, my husband and I were talking about our faith lives and especially about the changes that I've made in the past year or so. I said these exact words to him: "I finally figured out that I can't do it by myself. I just can't. I need help. And the only place I can find enough strength, joy, comfort, peace, and determination to do things better and over and over and over again is through the Lord."

My own words rang out in my mind -- when I spoke them, I was talking about myself as a mother, wife, friend, daughter, woman, etc. I wasn't at all speaking about my weight loss efforts and everything that goes along with that journey -- yet, here I was -- at the same place and feeling and thinking the very same thing.

I can't do it by myself. I just can't. I need help. And the only place I can find enough strength, joy, comfort, peace and determination to do things better and over and over and over again is through the Lord.

And now I'm talking about my weight loss efforts. It's finally time to do this the right way. It's time to do this for me, through Him.

Ever since Thursday, I've had a great week. It hasn't been a struggle to do what I need to do. What I NEED to do. The biggest change is that I *want* to do it now. For me. Not because I'm turning my CR in. Not because I have to recite that verse as I step on the scale.

I want to do this because I know I can. I want to do this because I know He wants me to. I want to do this to glorify Him.

Here's a verse I found this morning as I was doing some reading. I put it on an index card and taped it to the fridge. It's basically what happened to me after Thursday night. I love it when the Word speaks right to me. To me. What a gift; what a treasure.

I Corinthians 10:13 (NLT)
"But remember that the temptations that come into your life are no different than what others experience. And God is faithful. He will keep the temptation from becoming so strong that you can't stand up against it. When you are tempted, He will show you a way out so that you will not give in to it."

Monday Morning P.S. - I wrote this last night before going to bed. I just finished my Bible study for the day. Here is word-for-word the prayer at the end of the lesson (which was pretty much ALL about this exact topic): "Heavenly Father, help me to make a fresh commitment to my efforts in the First Place program so that I may reap a harvest. Holy Lord, help me to make every effort to be found spotless, blameless and at peace with You."

I guess I'm really in the right place, wouldn't you say?

Not-So-Wordless Wednesday

2007-10-24T13:56:00.001-07:00

I seem to have trouble with this whole "wordless" part. (Shocker.) For the record -- I am SO FAR behind on making the bloggy commenting rounds. Sorry, bloggy friends. I've been kinda swamped over here. I'm reading, and enjoying and will be back in the saddle soon. I promise!!

Okay- so here's an oldie, but a goodie. Yes -- that's right, we are Red Sox fans smack dab in the middle of Rockies country. (FYI for all of you out there that may not be married to baseball fanatics like my man -- the World Series starts tonight.)

Oh, and p.s. - that one sock of hers was missing for that ENTIRE season.

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Red Sox!!!

Mini-Me Monday - Check In #6

2007-10-22T11:05:00.000-07:00

Okay - so not so great of a week. Both kids were sick, I fought off a cold myself, and well - without spelling it out - let's just say I had a very good reason for gaining some weight that day. I didn't work out as often as I would have liked to, and I completely (and I mean COMPLETELY) blew it this weekend. The thing about this weekend is that I got a date day in with my husband -- and we needed that so much. We had a couple of weeks where we were snapping at each other about any and every little thing, and both generally were run down. To get away from town for a day, enjoy ourselves and just be together without anything pressing on us was exactly what we needed. We needed some rest and relaxation and we got both.

Okay, so back to the mini-me part of things. One of the comments on my CR (the thing I turn in at meetings that says what I ate, etc.) one of my leaders wrote to me was to try and not lose control on the weekends. Ummmm, yeah. Maybe next weekend I'll work on that one. Baby steps. I'm taking baby steps. It's still a problem.

Maybe that will be my goal - to keep this coming weekend under control. Okay - there ya go. I have a goal. Well, that - and to tip the scales in the right direction again.

On a good note - this past week I used my weights for the entire workout for my hardest dvd - AND I did each and every situp, and all of the pushups. To do ALL of that - was a good step. I'm getting in better shape, apparently. Hooray!

How's it going for you ladies, my other mini-me'ers?